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How long until you fall in love?

StAy HiGh

StAy HiGh

Bluelighter
Joined
Nov 2, 2004
Messages
196
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Dark side of the moon
How long, on average, does it take to fall in love? I know the answers will vary, but I'd like to get an estimate. Thinking back to your best relationship, or your past relationships as a whole, how long into the relationship did it take you to really fall in love? How long after dating did you say those infamous words "I love you"? Did something spark these feelings inside you, a gesture, act, convo, etc or something that sparked a realization within making you suddenly feel head over heels for this guy/girl? Or were those feeling gradually progressing overtime and it just felt right to say it and believe it? or a mixture of right timing and seeing your partner in another light?

what made you fall in love? how long until you fall in love?
 
My first girlfriend I dated around 8 months and didn't fall in love with her.

My second I knew after 2 months. I could tell because I kept on getting more and more attached to her, crying about me going to college, wanting to talk.
 
StAy HiGh said:
Thinking back to your best relationship, or your past relationships as a whole, how long into the relationship did it take you to really fall in love?
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Not sure what you mean by "really fall in love". To know with certainty, I would say 3-6 months, but from that it continuously grows (three years and still growing).

StAy HiGh said:
How long after dating did you say those infamous words "I love you"?
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About the same period, 3-6 months.

StAy HiGh said:
Did something spark these feelings inside you, a gesture, act, convo, etc or something that sparked a realization within making you suddenly feel head over heels for this guy/girl? Or were those feeling gradually progressing overtime and it just felt right to say it and believe it? or a mixture of right timing and seeing your partner in another light?
Click to expand...

Gradual.

StAy HiGh said:
what made you fall in love?
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Her incredible intelligence and sense of ethics, her extraordinary beauty, sense of humour and crazy kinkyness :-)

StAy HiGh said:
how long until you fall in love?
Click to expand...

You mean how long I usually stayed celibate ? It varied greatly, between 2 months and 2 years.
 
In my best relationship, it took me about 3 months. He told me he loved me after two days though hahaha...but I was his first girlfriend so that's probably why :P actually I told him back because I thought I loved him too but a few months later I realized my feelings had gotten much more powerful and overwhelming and stuff. So I guess you could say it was progressive.
 
There is no average.
The same person can take varying amounts of time to develop varying degrees of emotion throughout various stages of their life to the same person let alone with people in general.
Let's not forget the value of expressing love from day one as opposed to falling in love.
 
With my first boyfriend, we said "I love you" after 8-9 months. I thought I felt in then, but, thinking back, it wasn't even close to love. We dated for three years.
With my current boyfriend, we said "I love you" after 6-7 months. I honestly felt it after maybe 4-5 months. We have been dating for over two years. It keeps growing stronger.

As was said before, there is no average, but that is my experience :)
 
Strong romantic attraction isn't love. Falling in 'Love' should be considered the point where you develop familial love for a romantic partner.

I've yet to reach that point with a romantic partner.
 
I think there's a difference between loving someone and being in love with them. I've been in a couple relationships where "like" wasn't a strong enough term to describe how i feel (damn limitations of language) but saying I was in love was too strong. Falling in love though has only happened twice with me, they're ex's now yet oddly enough I still think about them and what could have been. The first girl was maybe 4 or 5 months and then I proposed to her but broke it off about a year and a half later. The second girl was maybe 2 months? Sadly drugs tore us apart and I still miss her to this day. WOW it's actually my ex fiance's birthday today, crazy...
 
No answer for that; you hear about people feeling a crazy connection from the very first, and others who (as mentioned) go out for years and never really feel it. For that matter, I think you can also love someone and not even be consciously aware of it, let alone vocalize it.
 
Ok fair enough...
Lust? On sight...
Like? 1 date...
Love? A few weeks to a few months...
Willing to put up with a lot of issues? Priceless...
 
Anywhere from two weeks to a month. Took me two months to tell my beau "I love you", though I was thinking it for a month.
 
I agree that there is a difference with being "in love" and having love for someone. In love- true passionate, deeply intimate, taking the bad with the good, putting them before yourself, wanting a future together, being 100% about that special guy/girl (u get the picture) vs love which is close intimatcy, having a strong emotional connection and friendship. You love your family, you love your closest friends, but youre not IN love with them! Sure theyre different. I agree w the poster who said there have been ppl whom I felt something stronger then "like" for but the limitations of language didnt allow me to express it without jumping to love.

I was in love, once, he said it after 2 months and I said it back. Stayed together 4 years. kinda Short time frame to say those 3 words but we meant it. I think it was just lust at first that developed to infatuation and eventually being "in love".

I wonder if those feelings dont come right away, or at least under a year (seems long to me), if two people will ever really fall "in love"? Maybe their relationship will grow into love, deeply caring for one another, but will that passion i-have-to-have-you soulmate type feeling be there? I wonder if its just there from the start, or at least until they rly get to know eachother, or if it never comes. hmm
 
I don't think there's really an average for me (or really for anyone). You could be head over heels for someone on like ur 3rd date or u could be with them for months and not feel it ever. I know people who got married after like a week and have been together 20+ years happy as can be (clearly this is a unique and isolated incident but kinda the point) for me I felt it early on but its 2 early 2 say cuz u wanna be shure and don't want them 2 freak out yady yady yada lol. So gradualy I'd say. I told her after 4ish months (maybe more). And she was just everything I was looking for and could want. Fun caring blah blah blah :)
 
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