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How long should I wait? (traumatic experience)

N

NJ5227

Bluelighter
Joined
Oct 14, 2011
Messages
130
Location
among the rocks
I had a nasty experience a little over 2 months ago.

A little over 2 months ago, I went to a concert with my gf of 2 years. We had had a rough few weeks but the last few days had been better. My girl presents me a cap of molly (unknown dosage) as a present. We had been waiting for this concert for awhile so this seemed like an awesome present at the time.

About 45 mins later, as we started to come up, she asked me outside to talk. Within a few minutes, the conversation somehow turned to our relationship, and soon she told me it was over.

We quickly left for home to sort this out. I was freaking out. I started having an anxiety attack shortly after she left the house for the night. I was able to get my Dad to come over and ride this out with me (he didn't know the whole story).

The following days were awful. I felt like I was in shock. The break up is finally resolved, both on her end as well as emotionally on me. Only now am I feeling normal again and not ridden with depression and anxiety. This was a very scary experience! I would liken it to being dressed up to go to the beach, and being thrown in a pool of ice water.

I'm looking to close the door on this relationship and move forward with myself. In the past, mdma has been very helpful in pushing me into the next phase of my life. However, based on what happened I'm very hesitant to use a SRA. I've been wondering when might be safe to explore a seratonin release agent in the future? I have some very quality 6-apb powder thats waiting for the right time.

Any advice on this situation is appreciated.
 
What a bitch, who gives someone a psychoactive substance and then breaks up with them. Your better off without her.
 
agreed carr90. I think its not only fucked up to do to the person, but also disrespecting the substance. I came out ok compared to her. She went all jerry springer and started screwing a married couple. More power to ya kid. She's a mess, glad to be rid of her.
 
She gave you molly planning to break up with you? that's fucked! I would wait at least another month and see how you feel. Nobody can tell you the ideal amount of time because everyone is different, however i recommend a minimum 90 day break.
 
thats what i was thinking, at the minimum. I don't feel right now that its a good idea. I've kinda used molly as a motivational tool, and I've got my hands full until March. That way, i can relax and really let go.

I'm hoping she hasn't ruined it for me for good :(
 
Holy shit. . . Man I can't tell you how sorry I am to hear that. What an incredibly fucked up thing to do to someone. Wrong on SOO very many levels.

Severely Etarded is right. . . as for as the substance itself goes give yourself at least 3 months. . . emotionally speaking you may very well decide you want longer. Unfortunately at least until you'd start peaking the substance has such a negative connotation for you. You may find that you'll want to wait until you've sure you're completely and totally over her. You may find that you want to wait until you have someone else in your life you care about to share it with. Honestly only you will know when it will be right for you again.

I don't think she's ruined it for you forever. Don't let her have that power. If MDMA is something you enjoy then don't allow her to poison it for you. Allow yourself time to heal of course (emotionally speaking. . . at least 90 days chemically) but take back your authority for your happiness when you're ready.

Best of luck to you man. . . and I can't help but say again: WHAT A FUCKING CUNT!! (sorry had to)
 
thanks for the reply Nottamous, and I completely agree with you, she is a cunt! lol. Anyway, all the advice seems to coinicide with what I had already thought, its good to have the reassurance and the words of advice. As bad as I got it, she's living a lot worse without me. I can definitely do better.

Thanks again for the support :)
 
God, how horrible. So sorry for you, OP <3

I agree with other responders, take a good long break from MDMA, and a permanent break from that girl! Next time you roll, remember set and setting and try to have everything be as positive as possible to help your brain re-associate MDMA with happy times.

Best of luck to you :)
 
SET UNCE SETTING, it's not your fault this happened my man, I'm sure the next time you roll in a great place you'll have a blast, and fuck that bitch, there are plenty out there brother.
 
Dude, that's really fucked up. I'm so sorry to hear that. In her defense though, she probably didn't plan it out like that. When the E kicked in, her true feelings probably came to the surface, and if that's the case, then find someone better. I'm also in a relationship of 2 years, and if my girlfriend did something like that, I would probably lose my mind.
 
i agree with the above; why the fuck would she do this at a concert and on 'e'. She should have said something before or after.

I think you'll be fine so long as you don't associate mdma, drug use or concerts with that experience. I imagine if you went to a concert right now that you were excited about and took mdma the same way that you might think about your break up but even so it may help you to finally push past it and not be worried about using mdma or other drugs in the future. You will know when the time is right, if you feel stable emotionally then i think you'll be okay.
 
Ya... This girl is retarded or you must have said something insanely dumb. Giving someone a psychoactive with the intent of discussing any type of serious issue is one of the most fucked up things I have heard in awhile.
 
thanks for all the advice from everyone. What made this experience particularly difficult is that I moved out here to CO 6 months ago with her, so I had to go through this with virtually no support network at all.

Its been almost 3 months and the anxiety has diminished significantly. I'm a fairly experienced user of psychedelics and I'll definitely make sure the next setting will be very friendly, with a mix of some established friends, and a bunch of new ones. Part of the magic of using these substances is building the anticipation :) Thanks for all the advice and words of encouragement guys n gals, its helpful for sure
 
^OP, I didn't even notice you were from CO! Welcome!

If you don't mind me asking, what show were you at when this happened?
 
queenbee1127 said:
^OP, I didn't even notice you were from CO! Welcome!

If you don't mind me asking, what show were you at when this happened?
Click to expand...

Thanks! Despite this shit storm, I love it out here!

It was the Portishead show back on Oct 27 at the 1st Bank Center. Talk about salt in the wound, I over paid for the tix, and only got to hear about 5 songs before we had to leave. Did I mention that i've been trying to see them live since the mid 90s? :-/

I wish I could say I made all this up.
 
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