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How High Are You? v. Ticket To Ride The White Line Highway

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Half a gram of meth, topped off with a nice MDMA capsule.

Time to crank up the hard trance music! :D
 
Smoking more meth, before I go out to help a friend with some 3am renovations to her house.
 
700 mg carispodal, 100 mg diphenhydramine. Massive, unsafe dose of tramadol. Might pop an ambien to see if I can get a nod on. I've never had a true nod on tramadol, but I'm feeling sweet and detached enough that I think I might be able to today.
 
amt IS very euphoric, but not as psychedelic as I hoped at this level. Maybe add 20mg in a few minutes. I imagine 50mg mdma and 50-75ug lsd would feel similar, though perhaps less intoxicating.

Edit: Added 20mg now unsure if first dose had peaked.

Edit: I was in a mental instutution for saying the wrong things and trying to jump into traffic(Actually going to edge of road to get reception)
I was neither homicidal, suicidal, or acting strangely. They did it for no good reason, 5 days thrown away. They gave me a risperdal 2 week injection. I think they may be trying to turn the patients into aliens or mindless drones. my one shot is harmless but I worry about those who get 10 or 20. They are well on their ways to becoming mindless drones and slaves. It is some corporation behind it. I don't know if aliens are involved but it looked like the pigs were not controlling their shape well after I hit my head(first time to loony bin).

The first time I went was for behavior while out of my head due to injury(fighting against ambulance crew, trying to grab a cops gun). I didn't know my own name then. I was back to normal and was told my institutionalization was "because we don't tolerate violence against ambulance crew or police" no matter that I thought I was in danger from them. I was back to my senses, it was just for revenge that I got sent away 3 days, the shrinks thinking I didn't belong and was slightly depressed otherwise normal. I have little memory of the ambulance ride or grabbing at guns and tazers with intention of suicide to escape what seemed like hell to me. I wasn't going to fight the cops if I got the gun. Either I shoot myself, someone else does, or zI am talked down. I was still completely out of it from the headblow.
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But don't trust any long lasting shots. They may be for nefarious purposes. Take 1 to get out if you must, but that's it. That was the choice I had to make.

Now I feel bad about those I left behind, many who didn't seem to need to be there.


I'm filing a lawsuit against the PD who decided it was a crime for me to walk down a sidewalk, suggested a place I could cool off maybe 150meters away, then didn't let me walk there. I offered to go in car after they got me in handcuffs, instead straight back to an inhumane nut house. I have no idea what I di dwrong there. I did start cussing and screaming when I found out where I was going, those places make every day an unending depression of a deep nature even though I was not depressed going in. I think it makes normal people depressed. I've felt much worse since #1 though much improved in number 2 when given depakote. I still felt bad usually, just not near suicidal.


I am still negatively impacted in how I function due to the experiences, sometimes crying an hour and I have nightmares where I am back and bad things happen. I am always afraid of police and doctors. I fear the power they hold. They could put me away at any time for any stupid reason. I hate cops and doctors. I am not depressed, the depakote took that away, but I fear the bad things that could happen everytime I leave the house. every drive to college is a challenge, with fears of something going wrong. I want to sue as many as I can.


These places, especially Parkview Dallas and Green Oaks Dallas need to be investiged. At the second, someone told me that they called my mom alerting her that I died of a ketamine overdose. Only staff knew I had used ketamine. They would not allow me to call my mom to let her know I was alive and wouldn't agree to make the call theirselves. That was cruel , having me think I was thought dead by parents and nothing I could do about it. They also violated my legal rights by letting my ketamine trip story get to the patients. They will be sued.


For parkview, I don't need money. If they clean their act up I will be happy. No beds, only chairs a couch and one 15 inch tv. There was a guy who slept on top of saved garbage as a bed, and always garbage in other places. Very unsanitary and inhumane.

Trip update:
More visual and empathogenic now. Music is totally at a new level, I can feel deep down in my soul every sound. Time to stop typing.
 
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No, just keeping withdrawals at bay. I added that much more and I might feel it, not sure.


Edit: I think this would be a good psychotherapy tool. My emotional state is open.
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I had a couple of trips a while back involving me being in the nut house and it was quite similar to the reality I experienced soon after of being locked away for little reason. 1st revenge, 2nd saying thr wrong thing and trying to get sell reception on/near roads. I never showed signs of insanity. I feel like I will be permanently scarred by my experiences. My dreams are all nightmares of being in an institution and bad things happen. Its all I seem to dream now

My emotions are more locked when sober. It feels almost like iit coulds have caused mild PTSD even though no violence took place. I barely feel safe at home. They can do with me as they please. I have no control over it. I'd rather die than go back to an institution. I'm going to obtain cyanide to use if the need arises. If the cops puill me over or there is any risk of going back, I 'll take some capsules.-
 
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1 vape packing
2 bowls of weed from the bong
65mg of oc injected
20mg of ambien
150mg of diph for potentiation

and a lil grapefruit juice... wished i had some kpinzs but the script cant be filled till Tuesday

+15mg of OC for a lil booster

then vape alot with friend....

and say some guys carrying a 30 pack past my doors and i bought 3
 
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dosed another 200 mg of tramadol, 700 mg soma, and 10 mg of ambien. I was trying to get to sleep, but now I"m absurdly fucked in a very good way. i wish i had some vicodins. god yes.
 
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