Just got out of the mental hospital.
On 50mg codeine, 20mg hydrocodone, 4.2g gabapentin, 1mg alprazolam, and 15mg diazepam and a couple of beers to celebrate my release.
Tomorrow I have my real celebration. I'm going to use a huge dose of DOI and poppies.
Tonight I sleep after getting less than 1-2 hours of sleep per night for 11 nights and none the last 3 nights of the ordeal due to loud snoring all night from two patients in my room.. Things are quite weird right now probably due to severe sleep deprivation. I was suicidal and planned to kill my self with the date set for yesterday because I wanted to die on my birthday. It was triggered when the doctor took me off of my meds. I got really high and out of my head and told my mom what I was going to do and she convinced me to go. That place was hell but I am back on my meds and my depression is pretty mild now.
I just hope I am normal after I get some sleep and not seeing insects all over the place and feeling like someone from the mental hospital is reading my mind to gather evidence to take me back, There were no psychotic type symptoms until the tenth day of severe sleep deprivation. Even now I logically know what is real I think.
I may take a seroquel pill. I was supposed to get risperidone but they didn't give me any supply of that when I left. It really helped my depression, panic attacks, and anger. I was on it before but the doctor would not prescribe it or the zoloft and I went off the rails pretty fast when that happened.