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How High Are You? V. Dude Where's My Bar?

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10 mg hydrocodone
10 mg melatonin
A couple bong rips of Girl Scout Cookies

Hoping to get a little sleepy soon. Hydro and Oxy used to make me drowsy, but now they just make me feel numb and wired all night. 😬😬
 
Just snorted ~25mg of 2-FMA. I'm in day 9 of light suboxone withdrawal. Slipped up with opiates over the summer after 6 years off them, and had the genius idea to use suboxone to try to bypass kratom and occasional poppy seed tea withdrawals (very light withdrawals I might add), but liked it a lot so kept using it. I was never using daily, or even mroe than every 3rd day, but I would toss in some kratom or poppy tea after 2 days sometimes, and if kratom, I'd do it frequently for 2 days until the bag was gone. But still, I'd say I'm JUST past the peak of it. I've found euphoric stimulants in low doses work pretty well to counteract the awful sedation and some of the anxiety.

I am about to eat a weed edible, and I plan to take some phenibut a little later. Gotta be careful with the gabapentinoids, as I have used 300-600mg of gabapentin for the past 4 or 5 days, but I'm seeing my girlfriend for the first time in 2 months tonight, as well as my entire family, and I don't want them to know I fucked up because they seem to have finally stopped worrying that I would. :\

I've been taking etizolam to sleep every other night, took some last night, but hopefully the phenibut will let me sleep tonight. The majority of the restlessness is gone, though it is still hard to sleep. So that's good. It's mostly anxiety and intense physical fatigue now.
 
Xorkoth said:
Just snorted ~25mg of 2-FMA. I'm in day 9 of light suboxone withdrawal. Slipped up with opiates over the summer after 6 years off them, and had the genius idea to use suboxone to try to bypass kratom and occasional poppy seed tea withdrawals (very light withdrawals I might add), but liked it a lot so kept using it. I was never using daily, or even mroe than every 3rd day, but I would toss in some kratom or poppy tea after 2 days sometimes, and if kratom, I'd do it frequently for 2 days until the bag was gone. But still, I'd say I'm JUST past the peak of it. I've found euphoric stimulants in low doses work pretty well to counteract the awful sedation and some of the anxiety.

I am about to eat a weed edible, and I plan to take some phenibut a little later. Gotta be careful with the gabapentinoids, as I have used 300-600mg of gabapentin for the past 4 or 5 days, but I'm seeing my girlfriend for the first time in 2 months tonight, as well as my entire family, and I don't want them to know I fucked up because they seem to have finally stopped worrying that I would. :\

I've been taking etizolam to sleep every other night, took some last night, but hopefully the phenibut will let me sleep tonight. The majority of the restlessness is gone, though it is still hard to sleep. So that's good. It's mostly anxiety and intense physical fatigue now.
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That sucks my man.... I know this all too well. On my 3rd day after a dope relapse. Not an advocate of high dose immodium but I took 12mg in the Am yesterday, 12mg in the Pm and 8mg this morning. I am planning on taking another 8mg tonight and then 4mg in the Am tomorrow and 4mg in the PM. I also have some kratom but I have been using it very judiciously because it is actually not very helpful for me in opiate withdrawal for some reason. It never takes me fully out of withdrawal, I have to dose it every 3-4hrs, it keeps me from sleeping and when it is wearing off it exacerbates my withdrawal. I don't know how much I am taking because I don't have a scale but I have been mostly using it for its low dose stimulating effect. I have fresh leaves from one of my neighbors trees. I dried out the leaves and I am making a tea. I actually feel fine except my sleep has been absolute shit. Hopefully my protocol will reduce most of the negatives once I pull off all the helpers.
 
I forgot all about loperamide, thing is, some hemorrhoids I got from my longtime addiction of the past and chronic, severe constipation, got aggravated as fuck when I got constipated again, and I am just finally feeling better after a few days of shitting water. So I don't want to lose that... however, I know full well how effective loperamide can be at helping the physical aspects. Maybe I'll go get some for when it gets really bad (today it's pretty bad actually and I want to feel relatively good when I see my family/girlfriend... I feel more comfortable falling into a funk after a really nice initial reunion, rather than meeting them feeling funky. It's making me anxious to the point that when it gets really bad (mornings especially), I start to cave and justify one little dose just for when I first get there, and then I have to fight my way out of that mindfuck. Loperamide would be better than anything else non-opioid as there truly seems to be little to no cross-tolerance so you can use it for emergencies.

Although I am taking phenibut today (I stagger my doses and have taken 1500mg so far, I will probably go for 2g or 2.5g at the highest). So hopefully that will do the job.
 
^ Phenibut should help some. I took some earlier, about 1.5 grams. Up to 2.5 grams is a good dose for someone used to taking it.


Took 40 mg concerta

On the top of the bottle there's a sticker that says "Swallow whole. Do not chew or crush." lol That label was never on there before. It should say "Do not chew or crush or snort."
 
Xorkoth said:
I forgot all about loperamide, thing is, some hemorrhoids I got from my longtime addiction of the past and chronic, severe constipation, got aggravated as fuck when I got constipated again, and I am just finally feeling better after a few days of shitting water. So I don't want to lose that... however, I know full well how effective loperamide can be at helping the physical aspects. Maybe I'll go get some for when it gets really bad (today it's pretty bad actually and I want to feel relatively good when I see my family/girlfriend... I feel more comfortable falling into a funk after a really nice initial reunion, rather than meeting them feeling funky. It's making me anxious to the point that when it gets really bad (mornings especially), I start to cave and justify one little dose just for when I first get there, and then I have to fight my way out of that mindfuck. Loperamide would be better than anything else non-opioid as there truly seems to be little to no cross-tolerance so you can use it for emergencies.

Although I am taking phenibut today (I stagger my doses and have taken 1500mg so far, I will probably go for 2g or 2.5g at the highest). So hopefully that will do the job.
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the loperamide has been amazing just that small amount has kept me perfect... I didn't even have any kratom since a small tea this morning. I have even been running and doing pushups when I hadn't previously. My gabapentin connect moved somewhere across town but I might have to hunt him down for when I pull the plug on the lope or maybe order some phenibut. I'm fucking done this time. Over this shit. Going to go %100 clean for a while... I was leaning on chemicals to the point where I had to be intoxicated everyday with multiple substances again. I am super surprised that I am at the end of day 3 and feel fine with such a low lope dose because I went on a week long binge where I was using a half G to a gram of fent dope everyday. I did skip a couple of days after that week long binge and tried to use smaller amounts on those days but that shouldn't have helped that much. I still feel like Im waiting for the other shoe to drop.
 
I'm feeling clonazepam for the first time. I've always mixed it with other drugs and couldn't tell what was what, but this morning I took 2mg and have otherwise been clean, and I'm feeling a nice physical relaxation wash over my legs and finally feel peaceful enough to sit down and watch a movie or something.

Still very much a background feeling though. Supposedly 2mg is a strong dose but I don't really feel very 'stoned' at all, and am considering adding in some etizolam or something in an hour or two if it doesn't get stronger.
 
Drinking long drinks and talking with my dad about investments: why him investing in my Europe road trip would be positive for his mental health 8)

Clearly I should have continued my investment career (yearly rate of +20%??)

NBOMET high enough
 
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45mg methadone
3mg clonazepam (took 3 days off from last wed to sat on which day the withdrawal started to really fuck with me so I took 4mg throughout Saturday and took a break with this just first dose since)
24oz 8% abv screwdriver a few hours ago
Last small bowl of bud just now (pretty sure roommate is out too)

Feeling better but still feeling mentally shitty.. just that time of year I guess? Kinda why I haven't posted much the past couple weeks.

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Helpmeescapethis said:
I’m not even “high.” I’m depressed. 2mg fentanyl HCl IV just got me well. I could dose more, or stack some iso on it but I’m trying to reduce my tolerance.

I’ve gotten to this point. Desperately posting on message boards just hoping that somebody else has been here before.
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I know how your feeling my man, trust me. I just posted how I've been cutting back my own use and am in a mental funk. If anything, just know your not alone.
 
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