I used to use a lot more drugs than I do now, not long ago either, it was not that I had a problem with any one drug, but I would use many different drugs not on a regular basis, but reasonably often.
I found it hard to cut down, then something truly lucky happened to me, I met the girl who I am now engaged to be married to, and I can safely say, that is THE one best thing that has ever happened to me, she has been caring, empathisised with my use, and just been the most big-hearted, generous, understanding and outright loving woman that I could ever hope to be lucky enough to be the fiancee of.
My baby saw that although I was not addicted to anything, or doing anything seriously dangerous, that I could have done if I had kept on at the same level and allowed my drug usage to increase, so we talked it over, and came to the conclusion, that responsible moderate use occasionally is ok, and in some cases can be good for a person, just not too often, and not binging on things.
I used to go on two or three day binges on diethyl ether, its still one of my favourite drugs, but now, instead of going on binges every week to week and a half, and taking at least some ether every night, I will only touch the stuff..hell, its been several months now since I had any at all, and at most, if I have a supply of ether, I keep it small, and only keep a few hundred ml at any one time, partly due to the fact I scared myself with the previous usage, and of course, partly due to diethyl ethers nasty habit of forming very unstable explosive peroxides
Since I first met my fiancee, we became good friends on the day we met, which started by me randomly walking up a local disused abandoned railway track, to test a new scope I had bought for my treasured .177 air rifle, and I met her, her then boyfriend, who is a fucking dick, and two of her friends, we just seemed to click on a friendly level from the minute we met each other, it was purely by lucky chance, because if I hadn't decided to politely bum a cigarette from my fiancee's 15 year old friend who was with her, who only comes up to my town once every few months, I would never have got talking with the girl who I am going to get married to in two years
Having my relationship with my sweetheart, and her concern about me ABusing drugs, rather than using them, it gives me a VERY strong motivation and will to make her happy, by keeping my use down.
Now that you have been nicely bored to tears by my little life story, LOL, I suppose I will put forth a few of my strategies for keeping individual drugs at a low to occasional level of use, the only drugs I do use on any frequent basis are weed, usually every couple of weeks I will smoke up a £10 to £20 worth of the strong herbal class of pot known erroneously in the UK as "skunk" or a bag of bubble hash of the same value, £10 to £20, which I make last me two weeks, and buy no more than £20 worth in every two weeks, whilst limiting myself to not buying it EVERY two weeks.
The other drug I do use regularly, is probably the worst, being that I smoke. My fiancee is trying very hard, and doing well, to quit smoking on all but the odd time socially, with friends or under times of great stress, and she is doing very well.
I found I hardly even had to try, when my baby cut down, I went from 10 menthols every two days, to perhaps three cigarettes a day, and I now smoke just the odd few, not every day, just when I happen to have spare money, or get offered cigarettes, I tend to smoke quite heavily though, when under the influence of tryptamines, or worse, on my very very rare cocaine use.
Alcohol: I used to drink a LOT, so I forced myself to cut down, by sheer bloody mindedness really above anything, now I will very rarely drink any alcohol at all, maybe one or two units in total every couple of months or so, and I never buy alcohol at all, except for a birthday celebration for somebody else who did drink once. I find I have no desire to drink an unpleasant smelling volatile solvent that I use regularly as a solvent for my interest in amateur (legal) chemistry, I deliberately associated the thought of alcohol with the more foul smelling chemicals I have, mainly white phosphorus, now I find I have absolutely no desure to drink alcohol, and hate getting drunk.
Cocaine: I don't have THAT much money to spend, I do quite like good quality cocaine, but it is expensive, and I keep the risk of addiction or habituation at the forefront of my awareness, so my strategy is, I only buy coke very rarely, I might buy one or two grams of coke I know is top quality, once a year, or perhaps twice a year, and save what I do have, so very occasionally, I will blow two or three lines, and keep the rest in a small vial in my stash and use it very occasionally, not as a treat, I try to avoid positive reinforcement mentality, but just on those odd days where I decide I would just like to have a good time with a little coke
Other than that, with coke, when I do have some, and when I get started, I will have usually two lines, then seperate one reasonably fat line into 7-8 small bumps, just to keep the high up while using less.
Diethyl ether: I forced myself to cut down on this, and when I do decide to take a little, I only make two or three nights worth at a time, and I go to the effort of synthesising it myself, since it isn't illegal to possess here, so it takes a reasonable amount of deliberation, careful distillation and effort to go through and produce some, so I don't do it often.
Isobutyl nitrite "poppers": Used to use them all the time, now I just don't feel the inclination to use them at all really, I do keep a bottle in my stash, but its more for purposes of hospitality, as a good few of my friends like the stuff, so I keep it mainly to offer them, and only rarely take a hit myself, I only keep 20ml of it in a bottle at any one time anyway, and half the time, make it myself.
Mushrooms: I do like to trip on psychadelics more than any other drug, apart from maybe pot and ether, but I find them fairly heavy going, and use them more for a spiritual and mental cathartic effect, as I find they purge me mentally of much of the accumulated stress and mental strain that slowly accumulates, so I take shrooms irregularly, probably every 3-4 months or so, trip it all out, enjoy myself and come round feeling refreshed and my "emotional batteries" recharged.
Amphetamine/methamphetamine/ethylamphetamine:
I find speed of most types gives me a quite rough comedown if I overdo it too much, so only take speeds very once in every 5 months or so, and when I do use them, I will steer clear of meth, and either take cleaned recrystallised racemic amphetamine salts, or occasionally one dose of
D-ethyl amphetamine, as I find its not quite as harsh on the body and mind as meth, its closer to amphetamine than to methamphetamine, less harsh of a comedown than meth, a little shorter duration of the high so I don't stay awake and tweaked for a day and night and I imagine a little better for you than meth.
For some reason I don't find amphetamines of any sort even a little addictive, I enjoy them once in a while, but on the whole uppers aren't my drug of choice.
And I only occasionally touch opiates, I keep myself hyperaware of the issues of tolerance, addiction and dependance, just of late, I have done three or four experiments with some 30mg dihydrocodeine w/o APAP, on one time, taking them twice within four days, but I can honestly say that is the only time I have ever taken strong opiates at all close together, because only, I just happened to find a good few pills in a bag that had been lost
I have a couple of rules with my drug use.
One, and I NEVER break this, if I don't have the money actually in my wallet at the time, I go without, the one exception, being on the very occasional times I get good stuff from my friends for cheap, in this case, I allow myself to make a deal a few days in advance, so long as the money is already in my bank by the time I make the deal, and just happen to have to wait a day or so for the friend to aqquire the goodies, or be available to meet up.
Two, is that I do not inject opiates, amphetamines, cocaine, or any other stimulant, at all, for any reason whatsoever.
I happen to have almost a phobia of needles anyway, so I would be extremely reluctant to use a needle, and the only drugs I would take, and possibly try I.V or I.M with, are ketamine, and DMT, and possibly barbiturates.
My last rule, is never to sell ANY amount of any drugs other than legal ones,
And never to synthesize anything illegal, although I really enjoy gardening, and raising my own ethnobotanicals, I think even ones you would never take, should be nevertheless grown and kept thriving as a species, and that the amount of effort and patience I take planting and growing them, well, leaves me more than entitled to enjoy the fruits of my labour
I do keep a stash, I don't find personally, that it makes it hard to control my use now that I am this careful with my drug exploration, the one thing I do find a little hard to spin out a long time is good quality pot, which I find I can limit myself to buying only the occasional £20 bag, the bag itself, I find quite an effort not to smoke up too soon, although I am getting better at doing so, and I like to keep a gram to a half gram of high quality coke there, although I won't touch it often.
Most of the things I do keep, are the legal, yet potent ethneogens, which are something special in my mind, I have 50g of dried psychotria viridis leaves, and about a kilogram of peganum harmala seeds, and I have had them both for several months, and I will still have them, until I truly know myself to be ready.
All in all, I think I now collect more psychoactive substances than I do actually use them
![:\](https://bluelight.org/xf/BL_Images/Orig_Emoji/wrygrin.gif "wry grin :\")
