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How did you Stop?(Smack)

May be better to skip the crack session altogether? Maybe have some weed instead and chill out for a while. I find weed allows me to get some perspective on my (codeine) addiction and realise how stupid I'm being.
Until it wears off, of course.
 
i can relate to u aLOT TOOT. AS NOW WHEN WEEKEND COMES ROUND its depressing as its the same as any other day. rather than going out drinking an having a laugh with friends. Its alonely smoke to myself. Like every weekend. The fun times of addiction dont last long, if at all. It can be a very lonely place. Im starting to think about stopping myself.
 
One day I said enough is enough I made a plan to do a rapid taper, did that and jumped off the H. I burned through all my savings and if I kept it up I would be homeless now. I was about to choose homelessness over paying my rent and caring for my cat in exchange for a life controlled by drugs. I also couldn't breathe barely until I got the dope in my system, nor feel my arm (my medical problems were horrendous) every morning just to get out of bed, and that was ALL I looked forward to in life was having that morning dose. I couldn't function nor feel normal (falsely/seemingly), as you mention without using.

Joy, sorrow grief.. fun, friends, full range of emotions and feelings were absent. Those are coming back. I stopped showing up for LIFE. It just didn't exist for me anymore. Living. So glad I am out of the cycle. Once I hit homeostasis about 35 days out, and 14 days things began clearing up a little ... I was on my way away from wanting to die.

I wish you the best of luck on your journey moving forward. It's not easy but it gets immensely better. Hang in there!

~ Smoky
 
She's decided to not get the the H tonight which I know is a BIG thing for her because when she does one she does the other to bring her down and take the edge off. I think she just doesn't wanna risk it taking her back to square one. I mean who's gutted will she be if she smokes her crack tonight then wakes up on a physical rattle agaim?!

It's the lingering insomnia that's doing her in now, she booked a week off work to kick and it was her first day back yesterday. She knows she can't keep take benzos coz she will get a benzo habit, the mirtazipines not working. She's really frustrated with it. With working she needs to be able to sleep. Any ideas anyone?

Thaks for all the advice I'm passing it all on, I'm usually her go to person anything concerning drugs but even some things I'm unsure of ha.....I'd never heard of that thing where u can be months clean and start feeling like your rough. I domt underestimate the power of the mind though when you're starting to feel rough how much better do you feel when you're actually prepping it even though you've not had any yet?!
 
Tbh mate, she'd be better off using smack than crack. At least smack is self limiting, until crack is involved. She really needs to stay off both because once you've had a stone, you either want more stone to chase the high, or smack to bring you down. My heroin problem was never really a problem until I started on the white. That's when I nearly lost everything. 7 or 8 bags a day and even more stone - its like pissing in the wind...
 
What about weed? It certainly helps my insomnia. Diphenhydramine is pretty good also, but can result in groggy mornings.
 
curious_24 said:
May be better to skip the crack session altogether? Maybe have some weed instead and chill out for a while. I find weed allows me to get some perspective on my (codeine) addiction and realise how stupid I'm being.
Until it wears off, of course.
Click to expand...

Yep you aint getting off Opies without weed unless you have the willpower of Gandhi. I'd say it makes you more rational than you could ever be in your sober state, but also more paranoid.
 
I never had a problem with crack I never liked it. I like downers just as well though couldn't imagine a crack addiction on top of what I have just now. Weed is a life saver I reckon just wish it had stayed at weed.

Here I am sitting here, never phoned my man till half 12, he says he's wanting on his man. Fucking bullshit. Rattling hating life. I know my man will be in touch, but sitting here the way I am the way I feel why can't I just say 'fuck it' and CT it. I can't I hate it, but I know soon as my man text I will be like a giggling school girl, till I feel better then I will start the self loathe. This life just isn't worth it. Not worth the way you feel when its no there when its needed. I am defo looking into subs again, but yet there is still a niggling thought that says your not ready to give up. I actually feel full of dread if I even think about never using again, so when do you get that kick to the balls that finally wakes you up. I have many kicks just not one yet I have listened to.
 
fightingthetoot said:
I never had a problem with crack I never liked it. I like downers just as well though couldn't imagine a crack addiction on top of what I have just now. Weed is a life saver I reckon just wish it had stayed at weed.

Here I am sitting here, never phoned my man till half 12, he says he's wanting on his man. Fucking bullshit. Rattling hating life. I know my man will be in touch, but sitting here the way I am the way I feel why can't I just say 'fuck it' and CT it. I can't I hate it, but I know soon as my man text I will be like a giggling school girl, till I feel better then I will start the self loathe. This life just isn't worth it. Not worth the way you feel when its no there when its needed. I am defo looking into subs again, but yet there is still a niggling thought that says your not ready to give up. I actually feel full of dread if I even think about never using again, so when do you get that kick to the balls that finally wakes you up. I have many kicks just not one yet I have listened to.
Click to expand...

Sucks doesn't it dude

I've gotta wait for my ex girl to transfer my some money she's lending me but she is at work doesn't get on a break till 4 ... Then I've gotta wait for he who shall not be named.
 
We are in the same boat brudda. My man just phoned me he away getting, but that doesn't help me while am like this. About 3 the earliest I will get a toot. Motherfucka got to bag it and shit. He knows I phone everyday why can't he keep me by one? He has done it before always the same innit. I know how you feel needing to wait on a loan on money. Dayily struggle. Here bud, I if was you ad my man just now much fucking about he has gave you recently. If you bell'd the now he probs get there for 5. Least you can count on that chick. I have found, as you will have other people that care and understand what a shite time your going through is a fellow junkie.

Do you ever just think to yourself, fuck I am junkie. Everything that you hated as teenager grown up junkies and smack now that in the heart of our lifes! I am ashammed to say I used to give junkies hassle and write ''anti smack crew'' everyewhere I thought they was a hint of kit. Now look at me, worse than some of the cunts I used to give shit too.

Full of self loathe becuase of the rattle, funnily enough I have perked up a bit since he phoned. Fucking sick lah.
 
ScotchMist said:
You're right BCF, it's a trick of the mind.. I could of been clean for months, use 3-4 days on the bounce and ill start to feel withdrawals, nothing major but it's enough to convince you to use again and then the cycle begins again....
Click to expand...

Totally true, I swear I only have to use a couple of days in a row and that hook's in again.

What sort of rehab you going to?
 
fightingthetoot said:
We are in the same boat brudda. My man just phoned me he away getting, but that doesn't help me while am like this. About 3 the earliest I will get a toot. Motherfucka got to bag it and shit. He knows I phone everyday why can't he keep me by one? He has done it before always the same innit. I know how you feel needing to wait on a loan on money. Dayily struggle. Here bud, I if was you ad my man just now much fucking about he has gave you recently. If you bell'd the now he probs get there for 5. Least you can count on that chick. I have found, as you will have other people that care and understand what a shite time your going through is a fellow junkie.

Do you ever just think to yourself, fuck I am junkie. Everything that you hated as teenager grown up junkies and smack now that in the heart of our lifes! I am ashammed to say I used to give junkies hassle and write ''anti smack crew'' everyewhere I thought they was a hint of kit. Now look at me, worse than some of the cunts I used to give shit too.

Full of self loathe becuase of the rattle, funnily enough I have perked up a bit since he phoned. Fucking sick lah.
Click to expand...

Yeah man I've already the cunt he said he was busy As duck which is a bad sign in itself.

Told him it womt be till bout 4 and he said that's perfect but we'll see, the past two times Ibe gone out to ,eet him he's ended up leaving me hanging ignoring all my calls. Bad that. No1 else will come Down for one though.
 
I know that mate.
I put on a front I hated all junkies but I didn't really. I only hated what it had done to my family. I grew up seeing all the guys in my family bounce around of their nut on smack and valium, I hated smack, and hated them for what they put the family through. Fast foward 8 years and I was the one getting mad with smack and valium, after they had all sorted there lifes. I promised I wouldn't do that and I genuinely didn't think I would. One bump on my key that I dipped into a bag of kit and that was me. I never woke up that day I said todays today I try it. Just happens. As you will know.

Feel ya mate. People get iffy when its just one bag, if there was more money you'd buy more. The cunts need to learn take the bad with the good. Todays tenner is tomorrows big note. Mostly to thick to notice that though.
 
Yeah he doesn't mind if I'm near him in town he'll drop me one off but when I'm Down my end I need spend at least £50 to get him down here

Wish I had this tenner this mornings I had him down dropping off 6 dub for. A 1er
 
Yeh I know mate, no offence meant. It just kind of pisses me off when other druggies think junkies are fair game for abuse. Everyone from pot heads to alcoholics jump on the 'all junkies are scum' bandwagon. No one can understand until they've been there... Having said that, I know a lot of junkies who ARE scum, but they were scum before they ever touched heroin and probably always will be. As I've always said, being a 'junky' is a state of mind - it has fuck all to do with heroin addiction.
 
Can't you just buy a week's worth or a month's worth at once when you get paid? Surely that's better than having to score a day's worth at a time?
 
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