• Select Your Topic Then Scroll Down
    Alcohol Bupe Benzos
    Cocaine Heroin Opioids
    RCs Stimulants Misc
    Harm Reduction All Topics Gabapentinoids
    Tired of your habit? Struggling to cope?
    Want to regain control or get sober?
    Visit our Recovery Support Forums

How did I get myself into this?

Cristina

Bluelighter
Joined
May 14, 2002
Messages
157
Location
Miami, FL
If you would have even mentioned the word coke around me a few months ago I would have told you to shut the fuck up. Well in the past month and a half I have probaly done about 2 eight balls between my boyfriend and I. And no I am not proud of it, actually I'm really depressed. My boyfriend bought a eight ball on Fri. and we started taking small lines at about 11 or 12 at night. Let's just say I took a line about every hour or less. We went from chillin' in the car, to a friends house, then to the beach, then at about 7 am I went home because I had to be at work at 9am. I was still super fucked up though, so I went to work from 9 to 1 pm, got home and fell asleep automatically. I woke up at like 8 pm on Sat. My boyfriend and I knew we weren't going to do anything so we just droped a bar and passed back out till Sun. at about 10am. Then Sun. we just stayed in bed all day sleeping the day in and out. Now I am work (It's Monday) and I realized I just wasted my weekend, I am super depressed, and I kinda want some c tonight. Well even though I'm feening it I am not going to get it. And actually I made a promise to myself that I won't do it again. I would have never imagined how anyone could get addicted to this. And honestly I have done it so little. Anyways making this long story short, what is the best way to cope with the way I feel?
After reading some of your replys I wanna make somethings straight. Thank You to the people for the advice. And here are some facts to the people that don't really understand and are about to say something stupid.
1. I know I'm not addicted.
2. I am upset because I thought coke was disgusting and now I do not mind it.
3.I feel like I wasted my weekend because I am the type of person always doing something exciting and new and all I did was get fucked up on Fri. and sleep Sat. and Sun.
[ 25 July 2002: Message edited by: Cristina ]
 
i did just about the same thing as you did. coke was satan a few years ago for me too. i had more than one bad experience with coke that swayed me away rather quickly. i have no urge to get any now. try and find something else to take it's place be it something positive like reading a book or going for a drive or just some other substance. whenever you feel like doing it remember that you will probably be getting an 8-ball and end up snorting the whole thing and you will have a shitty time like the time before. and no matter what i used to tell myself when i was buying a bag of coke i always ended up with an empty bag just because it was there for the snorting. coke has a wierd grasp that baffled me because i was needing it and i have never needed anything like i needed coke. just try and remember the bad points of doing coke. it made me reconsider doing it.
p.p.
 
Cristina,
A couple of 8 balls in a few months does not quite make you guys addicted just as yet.
Coacaine is a great time used in moderation but really bad when pushed to excess. My girl and I have done it at times over 10 years. The key is never buy/ have more on hand than you want to do because most people will do it till it's gone.
What works for us is just a gram or maybe 1/16 for an evening. The last line or hit from the pipe pop a benzo and prepare for the comedown. people always whine about the comedown but it's really not that bad especially if you don't do a lot.
Feeling depressed the next day? Cut back the amount. Doing a whole 8 between yourself and the BF is really a lot. Sure there are those on hear that brag about being able to do an 1/16 or 8th "A DAY" but that's just stupid.
Hold down your usage to 2-3 special times a month, use less and you won't feel so bad.
 
During my few forays into the world of cocaine, there were several times when I had the opportunity to purchase larger quantities at great prices. I would carefully divide them up into reasonable amounts, saying to myself, "Great! I'm supplied for four nights out!"
And of course, invariably I would use it all that night. Not once did I manage to stop before it was gone.
Funny stuff, cocaine. I don't do it any more.
 
Ive been using cocaine for the last 8 years...and really have no pleasant experiences to share. I don't play with it too often anymore but have gotten in to my fair share of problems.
The best advice I have on coke is this...if you can afford it (and Im not just talking baout money...lifestyle, career, etc.) play until your heart is content. It doesn't sound like you have any problem with it now. Just be ready to pay the price when the time comes. I would recommend taking up marajuana personally. It's much cheaper and has a more positive effect on things. Peace..
 
Marijuana helps me with comedowns/hangovers. Seriously there are easier drugs to manage than coke - try some opiates or something. If you've got the money you could build an awesome relationship with weed/heroin. Otherwise do something even smarter and quit/decrease your drug use. That won't help you get over feeling so bad, though, at least not immedeately.
 
that really isn't THAT bad. people can develop several gram *per day* habits with coke. that is bad, not to mention unbelievably expenisive.
but if you feel you are spending too much $$$, or that you can't control yourself around it, then stay as far away from it as possible. loose your hook-up's phone number, tell friends who partake not to do it around you, ect.
avoiding a drug is the best way to quit it. if you are watching people rail gaggers, it will be tough to stop doing coke.
 
This is rediculous.
I'm curious though. Tell me Christina, what kinda drugs could people mention without you telling them to shut the fuck up?
Well in the past month and a half I have probaly done about 2 eight balls between my boyfriend and I.
And lived to tell about it?
 
I don't think you have nothing to worry about! a couple 1/8s a month. Thats really not much! If you don't have fun and you feel like you wasted your weekend then don't do it! I on the other hand think that sounds like a pretty fun weekend! damn I did an 1/8 saturday and all I did was sit at the bar. Damn -
 
OK! Listen UP!
Before all you people bash her for feeling addicted over the small amount she has done. take a couple of things into consideration:
1. when I started to do coke in small amounts like that, i've always wanted more the next day or weekend.. remember, there IS such a thing as psychological addiction.
2. when you hate a drug and start doing it and then wanting more, you get a little disappointed in yourself for going against your morals. i did the same thing.
now christina.... if you really hate coke that much and want to stay away from it, you'll do it. many of the other repliers had awesome alternatives to the drug (not just besides other drugs). there's lots of other things to do besides stickin white shit up your nose.
i started the same way 6 yrs ago, and by my 4th year of coke, i was rockin it up smokin crack spending CRAZY amounts in one sitting, dealing it to get free coke, rippin people off to protect my habit, and doing up to an OUNCE (8 "Balls") in one day/night.
how did i completely stop doing coke? i wanted to. seriously it will get you nowhere in life, fuck up your weekends like you talked about, you get all skinny, and wake up pissed off at yourself wanting to die the next day. why WOULDN'T you quit doing it?
lose your connections, get mad at the drug for the way it's made you feel, and whenever you do see it, remember how it makes you feel after it's done with you and think "ICK"! to yourself. that's what i do!
i really hope this helps you.
[ 23 July 2002: Message edited by: Jo Momma ]
 
Cristina,
Bringin up the amount that your talking about in this room, you sound like the lead character in "half baked " when he speaks up in a meeting and Bob Sagat asks, in comparison to his problem, "yah ever suck dick for coke?"
"I realized I just wasted my weekend"
I wasted a whole summer. Well not exactly wasted, I learned I don't coming down off of coke. (and a built a very good appreciation for porn). So I stopped, simple as that. The good thing is, with coke, a few days and you're back to normal, of course depending on how much you did. But still, a comforting reality is in grasp once you get a nice nap. You’ve done it once, if you do it again, you’ll live, but of course there is always that possibility it’ll sneak into the week and then maybe you’ve got a problem. But with coke that I’ve seen, the only people with real problems were young and stupid, most people grow out it or just get sick of coming down. Just be careful.
 
Jo Momma you hit the nail on the m#f* HEAD!!! you say, "how did i quit coke? i wanted to." right on. right ONNN.
i'm quitting meth the same way. i'm believing now, from experience, that benzos are the only physically addicting drug.
 
i'm believing now, from experience, that benzos are the only physically addicting drug.
Are you serious?
 
Originally posted by Cristina:
I realized I just wasted my weekend, I am super depressed, and I kinda want some c tonight. Well even though I'm feening it I am not going to get it. And actually I made a promise to myself that I won't do it again. I would have never imagined how anyone could get addicted to this. And honestly I have done it so little. Anyways making this long story short, what is the best way to cope with the way I feel?
just wait a couple of days for your brain and body to feel *normal* again. and if you think its gonna be a problem down the road for you...stop now.
you are depressed b/c you wasted your weekend doin coke. ok--not a big deal. its when you say "i JUST realized i've been WASTING a YEAR of my life addicted to ________" when it becomes a really serious issue.
sorry if i sound bitchy, but the serious issue mentioned in that last sentence--is what i've just realized. (not with coke, but with meth)
so stop walkin down this path b4 you try and turn around and realize you don't know how to get back
~kristen~
 
I dont understand why so many people think that time on drugs is time wasted. I guess it is for some people. It doesnt have to be. It never is for me.
 
Top