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  • TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | paranoid android

How benzos made my anxiety worse (some personal insight)

hazmatz

hazmatz

Bluelighter
Joined
May 26, 2013
Messages
134
Hey everybody, I have been doing some research and I think I may have some useful advice for people battling anxiety / panic. I will share some information I've gathered and a bit of my personal experience.

September of 2013 I had my first panic attack. For a long time, I could not figure out why it happened, but recently I have came to the conclusion that it was a result of abusing MDMA (in the month of June and July combined I took probably upwards of 2 grams) and taking psychedelics at a bad time in my life. I had a harrowing mushroom trip the month before my first panic attack and felt traumatized for several weeks afterwards and this probably contributed. My mother let me borrow some Clonazepam (Klonopin) to help with that panic attack and I took some extra just in case it happened again. Instead of pushing through the next few days, I woke up and popped a benzo because I was sure I would have a panic attack each day. Almost every day for 7 months afterwards I was taking clonazepam because I was living in fear of having more panic attacks.

In April, I just couldn't take it anymore. I stopped doing all drugs, benzos included, and decided to just fight the agony. I also stopped eating junk / fast food and exercised a bit more. The first few weeks were very tough for me. I was constantly in tears and once my dad came over to find me starving myself and crying in my bedroom. I was 6'2" weighing 115 pounds at this point. but as the weeks progressed, I started feeling my panic just fading away. It was a great feeling. Everytime I felt the panic creeping up on me, it became a lot easier to divert my attention to something else. Now I am 2 months+ drug free and I think it is safe to say that my panic attacks are gone. I have not had once since the day I stopped doing drugs.
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For a while I thought marijuana was the reason why my panic attacks were happening. and so when I quit all drugs and the panic attacks stopped, it verified my hypothesis. But today I was reading into long-term benzo addiction and I came across these studies:



* Benzodiazepine Withdrawal: Outcome in 50 Patients
In a short summary, this study found that after long term benzo use, most patients developed the folliowing mental health ailments:
Agoraphobia, irritable bowel syndrome, paraesthesiae, increasing anxiety, and panic attacks, which were not preexisting.
I suffered from all of these things during the time that I was self medicating with Clonazepam.

* Hypnotic discontinuation in chronic insomnia: impact of psychological distress, readiness to change, and self-efficacy.
This study found that successful benzo discontinuation was associated with overall improvement of insomnia, anxiety and distress symptoms, perceived health and self-efficacy.
This confirms my point that long-term benzo use makes things worse for most people.



My personal conclusion to all of this is that benzos are just nasty drugs. They are the absolute worst way you can treat anxiety / panic attacks. I wish I would have realized this sooner. But to anyone suffering from extreme anxiety and still medicating with daily benzos, I suggest weaning off and then eating healthy and exercising. I thought this was very useful information and I wish someone would have told me this a couple of months ago when my stress was at its peak.
 
Thanks for the info hazmats. I almost got into saying yes when I went to the doctor for my comedown when he suggested "try this for your anxiety". He didn't really force me to take it but I am glad that I told him and said "I will think about it and see how this goes as I don't want an other drugs." Fast forward a few months and I got better and recovered. Absolutely, diet and exercise and yoga too and meditation are much better ways to deal with anxiety and I swear by it.
 
Thanks for posting. I have heard this and read it, too. I think this is the most insidious thing about benzos--they make worse the symptoms they are prescribed to alleviate.
 
I can agree whole heartedly from personal experience the damage these drugs can do.

I self medicated with Valium fro sometime, reaching dailies doses beyond 200mgs, it took a great deal of time and pain but I did rid myself of the dependence. It was probably the darkest time of my life and almost the final part of it,

I'm aware that these drugs are still prescribed and accepts that it may be that in some cases short term use could be useful. I've shyed away from saying what I really believe here many times but the truth is I think they have no place in the treatment of anxiety or depression and would personally advise anyone being offered them for the treatment of these conditions to refuse.

The above only represents my view, although the information in those links and in many other studies would seem to support what I;ve concluded from personal experience.

In the UK ( where I reside) they are non longer prescribed for more than 2 weeks and those that are still on long term scripts are being urged to taper off.
 
I've honestly no idea how much damage my stupid abuse of Valium did, I wasn't well prior and had other drug abuse issue going on before, during and after.

What I can say is that despite what was probably about 2 years of abusing Valium and bearing in mind that tolerance rises fast especially if you are abusing these drugs so my intake was well beyond any therapeutic level I don't seem to have suffered any permanent damage that I'm aware of.

My job in technology is quite challenging and I do pretty well and I'm not aware of any memory of cognitive issues, the brain and body is amazing in it's ability to heal itself.
 
Allein, that is one hell of a dosage. 200mg daily, that is pretty intense.

Well regardless, I have read that benzos aren't necessarily neuroroxic, but they alter behavior dramatically which might as well be just as bad. I'm so glad you're off of it. It must've been especially difficult for you to taper down.
 
hazmatz said:
* Benzodiazepine Withdrawal: Outcome in 50 Patients
In a short summary, this study found that after long term benzo use, most patients developed the folliowing mental health ailments:
Agoraphobia, irritable bowel syndrome, paraesthesiae, increasing anxiety, and panic attacks, which were not preexisting.
I suffered from all of these things during the time that I was self medicating with Clonazepam.
Click to expand...

I also think they will also find a link between long term use of benzos and/or SSRI's and fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue, and autoimmune manifestations.
 
Maya said:
Thanks for the info hazmats. I almost got into saying yes when I went to the doctor for my comedown when he suggested "try this for your anxiety". He didn't really force me to take it but I am glad that I told him and said "I will think about it and see how this goes as I don't want an other drugs." Fast forward a few months and I got better and recovered. Absolutely, diet and exercise and yoga too and meditation are much better ways to deal with anxiety and I swear by it.
Click to expand...

yes. dctors should "prescribe" exercise, CBT, meditation and such before giving strong meds like they were friggin candies..
 
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