How Are You In One Word? v. Do A Little Dance, Make A Little Love

[Asclepius]

^ Way Far: Sucks about the g/f, at the end of the day if she cant accept you, she's not right for you hun. Hang in there pet!

frustrated

its been goddamn cold in here the past couple of days, then today i felt like the furnace sounded a bit different, felt the air and it was not hot, just warm.
i check and the pilot light is out, so i try to get it lit again. the igniting flame spreads out and ooover the wick, the flame touches it briefly and makes it crackle some, but no cigar.

being crouched down there it reeked of propane, but i couldnt notice it else where, even after going outside to get fresh air and reentering... a "technician" was supposed to come out, but its too late now.
im rocking the hell out of this little space heater, so im bunkered down up-stairs with my big fat cat...!

^Feel for ya PIP! The last few weeks before X-mas(During a severe and unusual Arctic spell of weather) the radiators went all nuts in the house...it was a lottery to see which one would come on, finally they all went.
Then the bloody pipes froze! 8)The insulation in the house was shit from the 1970's and had gotten wet from a burst pipe in the Attic...it was beyond freezing!(and I have no tolerance for the cold-much like an Elderly person) My Ex had his knickers in a twist over using the electric heater because he said it was ''too expensive'' to use... and instead of buying oil, he kept the stash of ''Household Cash'' hidden for booze.
There wasnt even water to fill my beloved hot water bottle

/rant

Snuggle that cat tight! Hope ye get some heat soon!

fightin anxiety attack - things are catchin up with me fast.

Sorry to hear that J, hope your ok? PM if its any use to ya!

Originally Posted by Mariposa
apologetic

I got triggered hard last night and took it out in a way I shouldn't have.

I did the exact same thing on Sunday night and had to grovel and beg for forgiveness on Monday after my stupid actions
First time that's ever really happened to me from drinking.

^Mari and N3o - Been here too many times as well It's 'Character building' apparently!

ATM: D'Oh!

Came back to the city for an Interview Tomorrow at 3pm. Had been corresponding with the woman in the headquarters of the Organisation and she just sent me the Address now; It is in another city a four hour trip away and I have no car ATM.
Cant believe after corresponding since before X-Mas that we never established the Address; I assumed it was in the city I lived in, since a) Its my Address and b) The largest part of the Organization is set up here!
LMAO...these klutzy things are a running theme in my life!:D

 

[panic in paradise]

patient/chilllly
still no call or no-show for my heater... idk if they know who all lives here(children elderly etc) what my primary heat-source is, or how well insulated the place is.
2 stories, fullll of windows, and is made up of several large areas.
its been in the teens&twenties F, but will/should be in the 40's today/tonight, that will be much much more tolerable..!
with a little snow storm, could be cool even.
its actually 63F in here, up above a door in the warmest spot, down stairs, 49 id bet?!?

my bronchia are not happy about this...

Optimistic.

(in the face of the most sincere adversity).

no shit.
im surprising myself, and there is just so much more to come soon.

 

[izzy66]

*determined*
i'm not happy, some things must change, and i am the only one who can make the changes.
depression gets in the way of everything and can derail the best of intentions. it is an insidious, evil thief and my biggest enemy.
-izzy

 

[OverDone]

anticipating
gonna be a busy night at work with the forthcoming snow.
time to make the sammiches!

 

[paranoid android]

Kinda pissed off at the fact that im i have alot less to look foreward to then this time last year. Im trying to not let myself get so down about things though.

Im mostly just bored

 

[Allein]

Better.

I'm glad to say that after really going off the rails in a big way in 2010 things definatly seem better, the very fact that I can feel weather its good or bad and tell the differnece is a big step forward for me

 

[Captain.Heroin]

Pained.

 

[theartofwar]

physically in a great deal of agony

emotionally, I've had some wonderful people help me from basic converstions to all sorts of goodness

 

[villian]

conflicted

 

[Blowmonkey]

Devastated. My cat died, he was my best buddy, I've never loved an animal so much. I miss him.

 

[drscience]

Confused. Things are making less and less sense to me lately.

 

[godlovesugly]

Devastated. My cat died, he was my best buddy, I've never loved an animal so much. I miss him.

im sorry. i know how that feels. its the hardest thing to go through. my first dog, chili, got sick pretty much overnight out of nowhere. we had to put her down. plus, it was the day after me and my bf of 2 years broke up too. she was in so much pain. its something i never got over and never will. i still cry cause i miss her so much.

my word: sympathetic.

 

[Asclepius]

Better.

I'm glad to say that after really going off the rails in a big way in 2010 things definatly seem better, the very fact that I can feel weather its good or bad and tell the differnece is a big step forward for me

Good to hear your doin well, really great to hear about success' :D

Devastated. My cat died, he was my best buddy, I've never loved an animal so much. I miss him.

Am so sorry BlowMonkey I have a cat that I adore and it would break me too...my heart goes out to you

Tired and drained

 

[panic in paradise]

Devastated. My cat died, he was my best buddy, I've never loved an animal so much. I miss him.

i know, well dont know the feeling yet...
my family has always had many many cats and dogs, but this kitty, 12+ years of devotion.

idk what i think about another cat...


seems people can feel silly mourning their pet, but there is so much unconditional innocent love and loyalty, im sorry for your loss.

 

[stellablue]

Happy and loving everything and without a drug. %) Thats a new one for me, living life without a crutch, and I am happy about it. Wanting it to last..........

Sorry about your cat Blowmonkey, I have two and I would be devasted too. I lost one a couple of years ago, and I still mourn him sometimes. They are so unique in some many different ways. *sending you good vibes from the Carolina's*

 

[n3ophy7e]

Better.

I'm glad to say that after really going off the rails in a big way in 2010 things definatly seem better, the very fact that I can feel weather its good or bad and tell the differnece is a big step forward for me

This is great to hear man, I hope 2011 keeps getting better for you

Devastated. My cat died, he was my best buddy, I've never loved an animal so much. I miss him.

Blowmonkey I am so sorry to hear this man RIP My kitties and my dog are my babies and it's going to kill me when one of them dies, so I really do feel your pain. I hope you feel better soon


My word: fat
I feel hideous

 

[Blowmonkey]

Thanks so much guys.

We had to put my cat down as well, something traumatic happened a couple of months ago, not sure what exactly; either a terrible fight, a car or something similar, or the little ram we had roaming around in the field behind our house for a couple of days, which seemed overly interested in pretty much everything that moved. We found him all battered up, swollen cheek, but he fully recovered within a few days, so we thought. He developed a cough shortly after that, after some homeopathic remedies it didn't really improve and turned into a more dry heaving cough, so we took him to the vet. She listened to his lungs and heart and said they were just fine, he had a bit of a temp increase and she diagnosed him with an upper respiratory infection. I was glad it wasn't his heart (myocardiopathy) or lungs, he had a tumor a couple of years ago, so I assumed the worst. Got prescribed a cough syrup and a cocktail shot of antibiotics and something to reduce the fever. He did fine (great actually) for a couple of weeks, especially the first 2 days after the shot. After his syrup ran out it got worse again, ordered more cough syrup, but he still coughed his guts out.

Took him to another vet around christmas time and the first thing he noticed was that his lungs weren't sounding that great, sounded like a pretty severe lung infection to him. Next day brought him in again for an X-ray and got some terrible news, his left lung was almost completely white and scarred and his right lung had some fluids in it, in other words he had ARDS (acute respiratory distress syndrome), not the best prognosis. Got prescribed some loop diuretics and a heavy corticosteroid treatment hoping he'd pull through. The 2 days after that he did worse, but after that he did so much better, I was getting some hope again. He endured the new years without much stress and his cough nearly dissapeared, from coughing every 1-2 hours to once or twice a day. This lasted only 5-6 days though, he started to pant and hyperventilate a little after waking up or going outdoors, which got worse and worse.

Yesterday was so bad, he almost didn't sleep anymore these last few days, I didn't either, I could hear the panting througout the whole house, nearly every minute of the day. If it stopped for a while he made gargling noises, so scary. Yesterday he just looked sad, had panicky and tired eyes, didn't feel comfortable in any place, kept searching for a good spot to lay down. Had to feed him his food his last few meals by putting it on my fingers because he had so much trouble going down to eat. My father decided he had endured enough already and called the vet to put him to sleep today, I didn't want him to suffer anymore either, but on the other hand, what if he did pull through? I feel so guilty for it.. I love him so much, he literally became my best friend. I could always rely on him to cheer me up whenever I felt down these last years, he was such a naughty little bundle of joy.

Sorry for writing such a big post in the one word thread, but I had to pour my heart out somewhere. I really don't know what to do without him, my life feels so empty right now.

Diddy.

 

[n3ophy7e]

Please do not feel guilty man, you did the right thing. It's a really hard decision to make but please rest assured that you made the right choice. I know it's hard to let go but he's not in pain or discomfort anymore. Much love Blowmonkey

 

[panic in paradise]

nooo problem.

most everyone posts a word, then expands anyway.

my cats ears have been bothering her a while now, she was panting and looking at me like ive never seen;strain&pain.
ive never made that decision, and was curious if i would last week.


it is the best thing, you cant let such a life force live that way...

my parents have become rather callous about it though over the years, shesh, they know when its time, and they go. lol, god, maybe after 30-40 times! but yeah, powerful stuff.
funny, and odd enough.
my cats name is ~


Biddy

 

[Asclepius]

^^Aww fuck...that sounds harrowing
No guilt, you did the right thing, they get traumatised so easy and have no proper way to express their pain, it was kind what you did.
They are special little creatures, love em.
Only positive thing I can think of is, you can always carry around his memory...
Personally if an Animal/Place/ Experience/Person means something to me I never forget them, I can kinda replay the experiences they gave me in my mind and it keeps me fullfilled and still keeps them close to me...kinda absorbing their spirit...like an active imagination shrine that is always in there...


You could always post a pic of Diddy in the Pets Thread Blowmonkey?

ATM: Warm