• The Dark Side 💕 Welcome Guest 💕
    Posting Rules Bluelight Rules
    Notable Threads Urgent Hotlines
    Bereavement Mindfulness
    Suicide Support Anger Management
  • TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | paranoid android

How Are You In One Word? v. Do A Little Dance, Make A Little Love

Status
Not open for further replies.
^^ ack sorry to hear that p.i.p. :(

I'm feeling content - gym this morning, then grocery shopping, and now I have a relaxing afternoon of doing sweet nothing ahead of me. I should probably do some housework & cleaning but think I'll leave that up to future-belarki. He's a pretty considerate guy, I'm sure he won't mind =D
 
had a lovely kayak with my sweetheart this morning and a good meeting in the afternoon. now i've been cleaning the house and listening to house. I'm content.
 
I don't like whining but things are dreadful first time in 15 years i broke my promise to never bee hurt again and after a heated mom dad son convo my dad pushed me into the bed... I bascally simlified told him he was dead i he EVER touched me again. He laughed that weird laugh

i come up and him n my mum are both laughing. I felt so fucking pathetic. Id say im working out of it my goals never stronger, that hurt was so awful tho i wont lie.
 
^you deserve to be treated with respect man. I know they are your parents but they crossed a line. That really sucks.
 
Frustrated. I should be taking my Seroquel and going to bed, like a sensible person would. But for some reason I'm still fighting sleep. I've been awake for days, for fuck sake...
 
panic in paradise said:
make paints

my friend use to masturbate, and ejaculate onto his canvases, then seal it with varnish, then find another medium...
:-X

... they actually sold very well!
Click to expand...

Holy wow I am laughingmyassoff at that visual.

I heard about a woman a few years ago who used her menstrual blood to paint. I recall that she sold several for big bucks.

My other word is distraught that I need to leave my family and friends in Cali and fly back to my other life tomorrow. I'll be back in ~6 weeks for another ~2, though. I always get this way when I need to leave anywhere the people I love are. I wish we could all be in one place together.
 
^ never knew you drank coffee

lol =D

me : patiently learning to be patient , ordered my class work and certification, 6 weeks hopefully ill be walking semi normal and certified !!! Shit's not cheap but can't put a price on having a legit future.
 
godlovesugly said:
i feel...alive.

:)

not numb anymore. i can feel now. and what i feel is life all around me.
im truly living now. no longer trying to die.
Click to expand...

That's awesome to hear - I'm so glad that your mind finally has given you that freedom. I rapid cycle badly and get horrific suicidal thoughts, im lucky doctors came so quick or id've died. Life is hard now, always will be, but my god I finally love myself and I realllllly love a beautiful woman <3. Pursuing passions for work - these are the ways i've found to keep on keeping on!! Really it sounds so cliche but do follow your bliss and watch as life continues to get better, not worse :). Best of luck.
 
theartofwar said:
That's awesome to hear - I'm so glad that your mind finally has given you that freedom. I rapid cycle badly and get horrific suicidal thoughts, im lucky doctors came so quick or id've died. Life is hard now, always will be, but my god I finally love myself and I realllllly love a beautiful woman <3. Pursuing passions for work - these are the ways i've found to keep on keeping on!! Really it sounds so cliche but do follow your bliss and watch as life continues to get better, not worse :). Best of luck.
Click to expand...

thanks :) it's nice to feel this way finally. for once in my life, being sober is such a better high than drugs. wow, never thought id ever say that.
but still, i do have depression with hypomania. along with the anxiety/panic attacks...so my mood can change at any moment. im up, im down, im good, then im sad. im all over the place. but fuck do i know that when im high, it's all just so much worse..


you sound like you're doing fairly well right now though :) i know its hard to deal with life on top of having to battle addiction and mental illness. you are making a genuine effort and not giving up. just keep doing what you're doing. it takes time, but you're getting there. :D
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top