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  • TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | paranoid android

How are you, in 1 word? v. 2011.2

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^Post pics of your new specs, please!!!!!

Me: piecingbacktogether

  • 9 college credits in 4.5 months (two A's and one B)
  • was handed a lucrative business
  • moving back to Colorado
  • successfully quit cigarettes (over 15 weeks of not smoking)
  • lost fat/gained muscle
  • celebrating 9 months and 7 days of complete abstinence from drugs and alcohol today

hurt some people and hurt myself along the way. Not happy about hurting others but what's done is done and perhaps I can make some sort of reparations in the future
 
Sore as my arthritis type pain is acting up since i started to work out again but I'll get through it :) . I'm also full from a awesome dinner so it could be worse.
 
^yo dawg, I heard you were tense so I tensed your tense:

tense, tensed, tensing
 
OD-- What a great few months you've had! 9 credits and quitting smoking? You're hardcore, man; proper.

Also: that's pretty well the best use of an xhibit meme ever. Well done!

ATM: stained. Literally. I had a glove fail at work while pulling a sample, and now I've got little brown/black specks all over my one hand and both wrists.
 
Stagnant

Things at home are...everyones depressed and not talking wtf? Yesterday my Mother was Hysterial-nothing I did changed her state; I cant manage it...so much stuff hidden at the mo, so many things wrong-is it there marriage?... why the hell do they put on this stupid facade. I hate it. All this shit is confusing and brings back bad memories, that I cant shake off. :(
 
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Asclepius said:
Stagnant

Things at home are...everyones depressed and not talking wtf? Yesterday my Mother was Hysterial-nothing I did changed...so much stuff hidden at the mo, so many things wrong-is it there marriage, why the hell do they put on this stupid facade. I hate it. All this shit is confusing and brings back bad memories that I cant shake off. :(
Click to expand...

<3
yeah, memories hit hard and the real uncomfortable ones seem to just come out of nowhere. Lately, I've just been letting them bring on whatever emotion that they will and just felt it 'as is'. Sometimes its been painful, uncomfortable and yeah, tearful BUT... the feelings were very short lasting and the process has seemed to make the next onset not so bad.

Would this approach work for you or are they simply just too painful? At any rate, you're still fucking awesome and I'll be thinking of ya today
 
Trapped. So many family gathering/obligations popping up. I want to crawl into a hole.
 
^<3 I know what you mean L.

@OD -thanks man, means alot.
My Mother is insanely delusional and Is incapable of seeing reason atm-it has been wrecking my head. Just her reactions and behaviour toward me have been reminding me(gross understatement-'transporting' me back to a state of anxiety) of the way she was when I was a kid;Id rather not re-live that shit.
I just have to detatch from her but its a bit of a poison chalice because if I just smile and nod- she keeps pushing me and trying to control and if I confront her about her obsessive-compulsive, angry crap-she starts to blame me and gets worse- there is nothing I can do.
Its the same shit all my life with her; she is incapable of introspection, she acts out and doesnt care about how it effects anyone else 8)...no peace from it
 
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