I never realized that "Solipsism" was real, I too have struggled with this in the past, but in a sober state of mind. I would leave songs playing, leave for 30 minutes, and try to remember what song was playing to counter the argument that it would just stop when I left and seize existing until I came back. I realize now that this is a stupid idea, but back then it seemed to make sense. When I used to take a shit, I felt good because sometimes I would think that once I closed the door, I was alone in my own little world and nothing else existed beyond the door and I was free to think and feel how I wanted. I have long sense given up this notion, but maybe if only a miniscule percentage I understand how you felt.
Call up your mom and talk to her so your brain realizes she's real and alive on a sub-conscious level. Keep telling yourself it was just a drug over and over. You'll be okay man, you just need to be more careful and in a more positive mind state when you medicate yourself next time.
You realize that none of us really "exist" in the notion that we would all like to believe right? We are born, with our brains intact in our heads and as we mature we start to take in reality as we perceive it with our eyes, ears, fingers, taste, and smell. Who's to say that when I see blue, it really looks like my red to you? Nobody knows, and nobody can tell because your reality is what you take it as. Imagine if there was a man, and all he did since birth was drop acid. He lived his entire life since he could breathe, just constantly taking LSD. Then one day he doesn't take it and the world around him is how you and I perceive "reality". Do you really think that he would see the same world that you and I see, or would he think of it as something else entirely.
You are looking into the details too much, trying to find an answer that doesn't exist and never will exist. Whether we exist or not, we are a part of your mind's reflection of reality and therefore part of your life, no matter if we are human beings or just names and letters on a chatboard. What you experienced was a bad drug trip and you will be okay as long as you don't look into it as much as you are now. Relax, you're alive and you seem to be healthy from what I gather.
Why if we didn't exist would your mind purposefully categorize us into different beings? Myself being PajamaSam, Elf_spice being Elf_spice, John being John, alice being alice. If your mind was truly hellbent on convincing you that we are indeed real and not figments of your imagination, wouldn't we all just have the same name and say things that don't matter? Why would your brain try so hard to make up this elaborate scheme that you're not actually in reality and replace everything with such varying and exclusive figures?
Decide to randomly get into a hobby, car racing. Would your mind then have to fabricate the entire sport, all the rules, the players, uniforms, and etc. Just for you to cope with the fact that it's not real, or would it make more sense to accept that it was already a sport and you're just a human being who just so happened to turn onto it? what makes more sense?
I have a friend that I have many deep conversations about (like this) and he probably helped me out of the whole "I am the only existing thing in the universe" phase, just like you are now. I hope that if I don't help you, something I say gets planted in your head so you can live a positive life and not live in such horrible pain.
Always remember what I said though, nothing is technically "real" or "existent" until your mind experiences and conceives it as such. We are never real and we can never be proven to be real, we are just what your mind perceives as real due to your senses (taste, touch, feelings, etc.) So would you rather spend your whole life trying to come up with the impossible solution of finally figuring out how to prove that we really do exist (you won't) or just accept the fact that we are here, you live on earth, in the milky way, and you live in the year 2013? Let go of all the stress and mindless circles in your head that make no sense and embrace the feeling of sobriety and reality in your head. Stop drinking, stop medicating with any drugs, and just stare out your window for a good hour and just accept that you
can't prove the impossible, and that you should just delight in the moment.
I know I've said a shit-ton, but to further my point I used to get so depressed and mad that I would never know if god existed. I would think in loops like "well if the big bang happened (which I personally believe, I don't mean to stomp on your religion) then how did it start? Who created the vacuum that the big bang was started in? If a being so happened to mold our existance, why hasn't he made himself known? If god exists, who made god? How can the initial creation of our universe not continue on infinitely and not stop somewhere?"
All these questions I had with no answers, and then my friend whom I mentioned before pretty much just said "why does it matter?"
"why does it matter?! I NEED TO KNOW THESE THINGS, RIGHT? I NEED TO KNOW THE PURPOSE IN LIFE! I NEED TO HAVE REASON TO LIVE!"
He told me his reason for living was that he enjoyed life, the little things. The explainable things, like a hot cup of coffee on a warm day, or seeing a beautiful flower in the summer. You will never know if god exists ever, no matter what religious figure wants you to believe, you will never, ever, ever TRULY know if he is real. The answer is to ACCEPT it, not SEARCH for the answer. Pick-up an old hobby you used to love, but haven't found time for recently. Painting, poetry, music, whatever it is, do it. Just relish in the fact that you feel happy doing it and that is why you should live.
It's okay man, and it always will be. Just accept the fact that you will never know the answers to the impossible and get back to living your life. If you spend the rest of your life asking the un-answerable you will lie on your death bed wishing you had truly lived life and not spent years wasting it away for nothing. Believe in yourself, but believe in your family, love, and happiness. BE HAPPY! :D
Call up your mom and talk to her so your brain realizes she's real and alive on a sub-conscious level. Keep telling yourself it was just a drug over and over. You'll be okay man, you just need to be more careful and in a more positive mind state when you medicate yourself next time.
You realize that none of us really "exist" in the notion that we would all like to believe right? We are born, with our brains intact in our heads and as we mature we start to take in reality as we perceive it with our eyes, ears, fingers, taste, and smell. Who's to say that when I see blue, it really looks like my red to you? Nobody knows, and nobody can tell because your reality is what you take it as. Imagine if there was a man, and all he did since birth was drop acid. He lived his entire life since he could breathe, just constantly taking LSD. Then one day he doesn't take it and the world around him is how you and I perceive "reality". Do you really think that he would see the same world that you and I see, or would he think of it as something else entirely.
You are looking into the details too much, trying to find an answer that doesn't exist and never will exist. Whether we exist or not, we are a part of your mind's reflection of reality and therefore part of your life, no matter if we are human beings or just names and letters on a chatboard. What you experienced was a bad drug trip and you will be okay as long as you don't look into it as much as you are now. Relax, you're alive and you seem to be healthy from what I gather.
Why if we didn't exist would your mind purposefully categorize us into different beings? Myself being PajamaSam, Elf_spice being Elf_spice, John being John, alice being alice. If your mind was truly hellbent on convincing you that we are indeed real and not figments of your imagination, wouldn't we all just have the same name and say things that don't matter? Why would your brain try so hard to make up this elaborate scheme that you're not actually in reality and replace everything with such varying and exclusive figures?
Decide to randomly get into a hobby, car racing. Would your mind then have to fabricate the entire sport, all the rules, the players, uniforms, and etc. Just for you to cope with the fact that it's not real, or would it make more sense to accept that it was already a sport and you're just a human being who just so happened to turn onto it? what makes more sense?
I have a friend that I have many deep conversations about (like this) and he probably helped me out of the whole "I am the only existing thing in the universe" phase, just like you are now. I hope that if I don't help you, something I say gets planted in your head so you can live a positive life and not live in such horrible pain.
Always remember what I said though, nothing is technically "real" or "existent" until your mind experiences and conceives it as such. We are never real and we can never be proven to be real, we are just what your mind perceives as real due to your senses (taste, touch, feelings, etc.) So would you rather spend your whole life trying to come up with the impossible solution of finally figuring out how to prove that we really do exist (you won't) or just accept the fact that we are here, you live on earth, in the milky way, and you live in the year 2013? Let go of all the stress and mindless circles in your head that make no sense and embrace the feeling of sobriety and reality in your head. Stop drinking, stop medicating with any drugs, and just stare out your window for a good hour and just accept that you
can't prove the impossible, and that you should just delight in the moment.
I know I've said a shit-ton, but to further my point I used to get so depressed and mad that I would never know if god existed. I would think in loops like "well if the big bang happened (which I personally believe, I don't mean to stomp on your religion) then how did it start? Who created the vacuum that the big bang was started in? If a being so happened to mold our existance, why hasn't he made himself known? If god exists, who made god? How can the initial creation of our universe not continue on infinitely and not stop somewhere?"
All these questions I had with no answers, and then my friend whom I mentioned before pretty much just said "why does it matter?"
"why does it matter?! I NEED TO KNOW THESE THINGS, RIGHT? I NEED TO KNOW THE PURPOSE IN LIFE! I NEED TO HAVE REASON TO LIVE!"
He told me his reason for living was that he enjoyed life, the little things. The explainable things, like a hot cup of coffee on a warm day, or seeing a beautiful flower in the summer. You will never know if god exists ever, no matter what religious figure wants you to believe, you will never, ever, ever TRULY know if he is real. The answer is to ACCEPT it, not SEARCH for the answer. Pick-up an old hobby you used to love, but haven't found time for recently. Painting, poetry, music, whatever it is, do it. Just relish in the fact that you feel happy doing it and that is why you should live.
It's okay man, and it always will be. Just accept the fact that you will never know the answers to the impossible and get back to living your life. If you spend the rest of your life asking the un-answerable you will lie on your death bed wishing you had truly lived life and not spent years wasting it away for nothing. Believe in yourself, but believe in your family, love, and happiness. BE HAPPY! :D