redandgreen
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Apr 19, 2012
- Messages
- 34
hii all
after having a bad day in provincial court and the judge and prosectuor basically laughing at me cause im so stupid and then getting stood up for the second time by the girl of my dreams on the most beautiful january day on the ocean and falling into a deep despair and considering throwing myself in the sea i got a point of china #4 in rain city off an obvious heavy user on the street and this was my first time using heroin (ive used a bit of tramadol and dilaudid recreationally before but not regularly and have a slight tolerance. it takes at least 300mg of trammy to get me nodding hard and really horny and 6mg of dilaudid insuffilated just barely makes me feel alright pain relief wise-- no nods or anything). im assuming it was stepped on pretty decently at least compared to what those with a decent connect can get that arent buying right off the street in the open air market.
i found that the powder wasnt that easy to snort, i tried to do it in little bumps off my finger tips but it just smeared on my fingers so i stuck my fingers in my nose and rubbed around. it was quite funny doing this in a bathroom which incidentally had the yellow lights to make it hard to find veins. it had an acrid taste to it which i quite enjoyed and after doing maybe half of half a point it immediately elevated my mood and gave me that classic light floating leg feeling ive felt on a good dose of kratom and about an hour and a half later i insufflated the rest of the half point on a moving greyhound bus while everyone around me was passed out and felt decent, got a slight nod and pain relief and boy did i write some shit i had boiling over in me down on my new moleskin notebook but ive felt stronger highs when i first used kratom and certain times i seem to get lucky with trammies. but still i enjoyed it overall. i still have half a point left as well as clean syringes and sterifilters i got from the needle exchange down there and would like to shoot it up possibly tomorrow with the supervision of a friend to make sure i dont OD or anything (he is not a IV drug user , i dont know any, i will be getting instructions off heroin helper or somewhere else online)
6 hours later after my initial dose i feel alright , my pupils are a bit small and i dont feel too bad. i dont feel so shitty mentally anymore but i think that woulda passed without the drugs anyways . does anyone think IV'ing half a point tomorrow would be too much? i have read people say dont use 2 days in a row to avoid addiction. i kinda just wanna do it all so i dont have it laying around and plus for the next month i have to concentrate on certain things and cant even really smoke that much weed. i cant get anymore heroin in my town, there is no open air market like in rain city and i dont know any contacts so i cant really do more even if i want to. im feeling extremely shitty lately due to life problems and want to run away for a little while and am feeling kind of self destructive after being ditched by the girl i like again who obviously doesnt like me back as much. boo hoo . im possibly also going to jail very soon for a little while and have accepted it and just wanna have some fucking fun for once in my life and act out a little . also this week i was unfairly fired from my new job which by the way was illegal and paid under the table by a major restaraunt franchise which i will be looking into sueing for their mistreatment of me and even though i was stoned on marijuana when it happened i kinda flipped out and gave the bitch boss a piece of my mind and considered kicking over a mop bucket but the nice girl mopping didnt deserve that so i went outside and threw a snowball at the window hard and peeled out in the parking lot. and now her boyfriend who goes to my gym who i was kind of gym friends with wants to fight me over all that and ive never been in a real fight in my life but i told him where i live and to come have a brawl in my yard with me if he wants to. also last night some asshole in a big truck almost sideswiped me off the highway and he had a certain bumper sticker that pisses me off so i followed him home and he lost me and i asked a nice girl for directions and she told me which way she saw him speed off and was gonna throw a empty container of wet wipes at him but he was waiting for me with his fog lights on so i drove away quickly and went home. i havent been acting like myself lately.
well thats my story. i found the whole experience kind of fun in a weird way. i realize it is not glamorous and life is very hard and full of sadness and despair for junkies on the DTES but i gotta tell u i felt right at home and the people down there dont judge you cause everyone has their own problems right. i remmeber once some drunk / high native lady down there yelling and crying "THEY WERE JUNKIES AND FAGGOTS BUT THEY DIDNT DESERVE TO DIE THEY'RE ALL DYing DEAD," and then another strung out girl stopped a full bus by standing in front of it, this was all on the way to a punk rock show at the now closed WALDORF hotel for any of you locals here. it really is a zoo down there. night time is a zoo. that was awhile ago and today i was walking around like a bozo all around town smiling and when i tried talking to some people at the skatepark they just looked at me like i was an idiot but i laughed it off cause i was having such a good time when normally id be deeply affected by someone being mean to me. you know whats also funny? i eat alot of organic food, dont eat wheat and tend to avoid sugar, go to the gym anywhere from 5-6 days a week, do bike sprints, meditate, take all kinds of fish oils and vitamins and am obsessed with being happy and this past month ive felt Sooooooo good on a daily basis for like a week at a time almost manic, but sometimes i get so unbearably down due to my inner complexities and problems triggered most often by my loneliness and failures in life and lingering PTSD and i think other disorders and i have come to self justify drug use because im sick of feeling so unbearably bad sometimes. ive thought about killing myself alot over the past year or so but i really love life and my family and friends even though they are not very good friends i think sometimes but this is such a typical warning story isnt it. i am gonna find a good therapist when i get out of jail. maybe they have one in there? maybe its a girl and shes cute? doubtful
ok anyways i think it is really funny in a sick morbid way how you can buy illegal street drugs and then walk a block into hipster heaven and the department stores and browse around like a normal person and then go in the bathroom and get high. five minutes after leaving the area with all the living dead junkies i saw the most beautiful cropped headed girl and she looked so intimidated by me with my hood up and cigarette acting like a badass for having just bought smack for the first time but inside im a sweetheart and i think ill move back to the city just to maybe run into her again and maybe i will b happy forever then. well i know someone is gonna read this and get mad cause i come off like a naive prick which i sometimes am but gosh i just felt so bad earlier and you know what? i self justify this cause last winter i felt bad for like a month straight with no relief and it fucked me up and at least i feel ok now. oh well maybe save the rest for the dark side. good night all. stay safe and i hope i made u laugh a little at least . if i bang up tomorrow ill post the story after. theres this cute girl that works at the gas station who sometimes wears a flower in her hair i want to go ask out and maybe i will get high and go do it. she has a boyfriend but fuck it
ok so will doing half a point of #4 heroin bought from a junkie first time IV'ing be good? thats my main question here
after having a bad day in provincial court and the judge and prosectuor basically laughing at me cause im so stupid and then getting stood up for the second time by the girl of my dreams on the most beautiful january day on the ocean and falling into a deep despair and considering throwing myself in the sea i got a point of china #4 in rain city off an obvious heavy user on the street and this was my first time using heroin (ive used a bit of tramadol and dilaudid recreationally before but not regularly and have a slight tolerance. it takes at least 300mg of trammy to get me nodding hard and really horny and 6mg of dilaudid insuffilated just barely makes me feel alright pain relief wise-- no nods or anything). im assuming it was stepped on pretty decently at least compared to what those with a decent connect can get that arent buying right off the street in the open air market.
i found that the powder wasnt that easy to snort, i tried to do it in little bumps off my finger tips but it just smeared on my fingers so i stuck my fingers in my nose and rubbed around. it was quite funny doing this in a bathroom which incidentally had the yellow lights to make it hard to find veins. it had an acrid taste to it which i quite enjoyed and after doing maybe half of half a point it immediately elevated my mood and gave me that classic light floating leg feeling ive felt on a good dose of kratom and about an hour and a half later i insufflated the rest of the half point on a moving greyhound bus while everyone around me was passed out and felt decent, got a slight nod and pain relief and boy did i write some shit i had boiling over in me down on my new moleskin notebook but ive felt stronger highs when i first used kratom and certain times i seem to get lucky with trammies. but still i enjoyed it overall. i still have half a point left as well as clean syringes and sterifilters i got from the needle exchange down there and would like to shoot it up possibly tomorrow with the supervision of a friend to make sure i dont OD or anything (he is not a IV drug user , i dont know any, i will be getting instructions off heroin helper or somewhere else online)
6 hours later after my initial dose i feel alright , my pupils are a bit small and i dont feel too bad. i dont feel so shitty mentally anymore but i think that woulda passed without the drugs anyways . does anyone think IV'ing half a point tomorrow would be too much? i have read people say dont use 2 days in a row to avoid addiction. i kinda just wanna do it all so i dont have it laying around and plus for the next month i have to concentrate on certain things and cant even really smoke that much weed. i cant get anymore heroin in my town, there is no open air market like in rain city and i dont know any contacts so i cant really do more even if i want to. im feeling extremely shitty lately due to life problems and want to run away for a little while and am feeling kind of self destructive after being ditched by the girl i like again who obviously doesnt like me back as much. boo hoo . im possibly also going to jail very soon for a little while and have accepted it and just wanna have some fucking fun for once in my life and act out a little . also this week i was unfairly fired from my new job which by the way was illegal and paid under the table by a major restaraunt franchise which i will be looking into sueing for their mistreatment of me and even though i was stoned on marijuana when it happened i kinda flipped out and gave the bitch boss a piece of my mind and considered kicking over a mop bucket but the nice girl mopping didnt deserve that so i went outside and threw a snowball at the window hard and peeled out in the parking lot. and now her boyfriend who goes to my gym who i was kind of gym friends with wants to fight me over all that and ive never been in a real fight in my life but i told him where i live and to come have a brawl in my yard with me if he wants to. also last night some asshole in a big truck almost sideswiped me off the highway and he had a certain bumper sticker that pisses me off so i followed him home and he lost me and i asked a nice girl for directions and she told me which way she saw him speed off and was gonna throw a empty container of wet wipes at him but he was waiting for me with his fog lights on so i drove away quickly and went home. i havent been acting like myself lately.
well thats my story. i found the whole experience kind of fun in a weird way. i realize it is not glamorous and life is very hard and full of sadness and despair for junkies on the DTES but i gotta tell u i felt right at home and the people down there dont judge you cause everyone has their own problems right. i remmeber once some drunk / high native lady down there yelling and crying "THEY WERE JUNKIES AND FAGGOTS BUT THEY DIDNT DESERVE TO DIE THEY'RE ALL DYing DEAD," and then another strung out girl stopped a full bus by standing in front of it, this was all on the way to a punk rock show at the now closed WALDORF hotel for any of you locals here. it really is a zoo down there. night time is a zoo. that was awhile ago and today i was walking around like a bozo all around town smiling and when i tried talking to some people at the skatepark they just looked at me like i was an idiot but i laughed it off cause i was having such a good time when normally id be deeply affected by someone being mean to me. you know whats also funny? i eat alot of organic food, dont eat wheat and tend to avoid sugar, go to the gym anywhere from 5-6 days a week, do bike sprints, meditate, take all kinds of fish oils and vitamins and am obsessed with being happy and this past month ive felt Sooooooo good on a daily basis for like a week at a time almost manic, but sometimes i get so unbearably down due to my inner complexities and problems triggered most often by my loneliness and failures in life and lingering PTSD and i think other disorders and i have come to self justify drug use because im sick of feeling so unbearably bad sometimes. ive thought about killing myself alot over the past year or so but i really love life and my family and friends even though they are not very good friends i think sometimes but this is such a typical warning story isnt it. i am gonna find a good therapist when i get out of jail. maybe they have one in there? maybe its a girl and shes cute? doubtful
ok anyways i think it is really funny in a sick morbid way how you can buy illegal street drugs and then walk a block into hipster heaven and the department stores and browse around like a normal person and then go in the bathroom and get high. five minutes after leaving the area with all the living dead junkies i saw the most beautiful cropped headed girl and she looked so intimidated by me with my hood up and cigarette acting like a badass for having just bought smack for the first time but inside im a sweetheart and i think ill move back to the city just to maybe run into her again and maybe i will b happy forever then. well i know someone is gonna read this and get mad cause i come off like a naive prick which i sometimes am but gosh i just felt so bad earlier and you know what? i self justify this cause last winter i felt bad for like a month straight with no relief and it fucked me up and at least i feel ok now. oh well maybe save the rest for the dark side. good night all. stay safe and i hope i made u laugh a little at least . if i bang up tomorrow ill post the story after. theres this cute girl that works at the gas station who sometimes wears a flower in her hair i want to go ask out and maybe i will get high and go do it. she has a boyfriend but fuck it
ok so will doing half a point of #4 heroin bought from a junkie first time IV'ing be good? thats my main question here
Last edited:
