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Heroin and Relationships

im in a relationship with a girl who is completely straight...she doesn't even drink, or smoke cigarettes...and im the heroin addict. throughout the relationship, i have been completely honest with her about my using, for the simple fact that i hate to hide shit like that, and constantly have to worry about her finding out. we have such a strong relationship, as she is always there to help out with anything, and its the same with me and her.

whenever we do have a little argument or fight, she never ever brings up my addiction...in fact she is always trying to help me out with it, and keeping me positive and telling me shes there to help me get help when i am ready. when i first told her about my addiction i thought she was going to leave me or give me a bunch of shit about it, but it actually was the complete opposite. not long after i told her about it, one day i was really sick because my paycheck from work didn't come on the day it was supposed to and she gave me money for dope, knowing fully that i was going to spend it on dope so i wouldn't be sick. i couldn't believe it.

i mean id have to say that her being clean and sober is a huge part of the reason, why i wanted to have a relationship with her. i thank god all the time for putting someone like her in my life, and thank god our relationship is the way it is.

i guess it really depends on the person you have the relationship with, because i have friends who have relationships where they use and their partner doesn't and its nothing at all like mine. but if the person your with truly cares about you as a person, and even possibly loves you, then having an addiction or problem with drugs shouldn't be the end all be all of the relationship. but people are shallow and narrow minded so of course this is not how things really work.
 
Angelosanto said:
My opinion is long term relationships where both partners are junkies will only last as long as the high is there. As soon as one person, or both people hit rock bottom decide to detox and/or maybe goto recovery you will find out that things will never be the same and you will have a completely different partner, one that you never truly knew. 99.99% failure rate in the scenario i just mentioned.
l
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Heroin + any kind of relationship that you actually give a shit about = a ticking fucking time bomb. Best wishes.
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Na, not all the time yo. I met my bf when i was 12, 10 years ago. we got together when i was 16, so thats 6 yrs together for us goin on 7 now. thru that time we have done all kinds of drugs together, we have broke up a coupe times n got back together a month or two later, and for the past couple years both of us has had addictions to heroin and oxy's at some time or another. I was addicted since way before a year ago, but he just started IVing in november of last year, and we went thru the past year as RAGING junkies shootin dope like it was our last day on earth, everyday. blew thru 11thousand dollars in one and a half months last jan/febuary, all kind of shit...And I cleaned up early in september this year and he was still using for a little while after, and then he seen how much happier and easier shit was for me, and he cleaned up too and now we both clean n happy n still together. if u really love the person n have a real realtionship under the drugs u can definately save it and work it out, its just when u get togehter with somebody without havin a relationship first, and then when they drugs stops the love stops too. but shit definately aint like that for me n my man ill tell u that much. dont generalize too much cuz it aint always true.
 
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So many flings, so many drugs. Keyword being fling...

I'm just glad I never caught anything.
 
my boyfriend and i are both opiate users, but he has a scrip for suboxone (which he actually got upped so he could split his scrip with me). i was very concerned when we started dating that it would be like a lot of people are describing, always fighting over dope and whatever, but i've found that we both prefer to be together in whatever we're doing - if we don't have enough money to get dope for both of us, we don't get any dope. i think this is incredibly rare in the dopehead community. of course, we have suboxone, so it's not like either of us are going to get sick. maybe that has something to do with it. this is the first time i've dated another opiate user, all of my other boyfriends have been very against heroin (which usually ended up being the cause of our breakup), and it is such a relief not to have to hide everything.

of course, we haven't been dating for that long. maybe the novelty will wear off. i hope not, though.
 
Well, I haven't been in a relationship where BOTH parties are junkies, but my last relationship, I was the junkie and my ex was the provider. Any money she had went towards getting me dope, and any money I had went towards getting me dope. Her car was my car to use to get to the dope spot. I would manipulate her into giving me every fucking penny she had, and I feel horrible about that.

It's funny though, because even though I was a complete asshole to her and everyone else in my family, I wouldn't change a thing because it made me who I am today. I am on methadone now since 2/9/2009 and I haven't touched dope since. I am also in a relationship with a very loving, beautiful, and intelligent girl who loves me for who I am, even though she knows about my fucked up past. So even though I did my ex wrong, I can't say I would change anything because right now I am happy. Don't get me wrong though, I wish I could have ended up where I am today without causing my ex such heartache, but I can't change the past.

-legz
 
Like in the Floyd songs... "we're just two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl..."

that summed up our relationship.

It was a rollercoaster ride. Helping each other get off e, being there together sick as hell, getting locked up together, running from the cops together. It was like we were the only two in the world. We had so many good times too. Laughing, listening to music, attempting intimacy on heroin. It was such a crazy time in our lives... Then I got locked up for 9 months while she was out running. It was the worst time of my life. Finally when I came home, things just weren't the same between us. Before long, we were drifting apart until eventually she passed away.

Now here I am, doing well, and I feel a sense of guilt that I couldn't help her. But I had to do my thing because I had a lot of time over my head. I chose to do the right thing, she didn't. I told her to just fight through it with me, but she couldn't.

I think about her all the time. A lot of the time we were together is like a big haze of days flowing into each other but I remember so many great memories.

It's just the unfortunate part of this love we have with drugs....
 
damn jd ur post almost made me want to cry, real talk...my old runnin buddy, matter fact a former bl'er...me and him spent alot of time together doin all those things that u described. i was mad tight with him and when it was like everbody else in my life had left me we would stil be out there runnin together, so many times and memories that i can never forget and it hurts me so much to think about how hes gone now, just this august he OD'd. the night before , i was gonna go see him at his house but somethin happene, i think he didnt call me , so i didnt go over there cuz his folks didnt want me there so i had to find out where he wanted to meet me at, and when he didnt call, didnt have a celly just called me from his folks restricted number so i didnt no it and couldnt call him, i was like o well i guess he didnt want to chill...Turns out that very night he was using dope for teh first time in a few months of sobriety and ODing right when i was supposed to have been goin out there. i will enver forgive myself. RIP ..

How ever tho, My True love, my real love, the one that i been with for about 7 years minus the 6 months that we spent apart when i was with the kid i mentioned just before, he is the one that was forever, thick and thin, up and down, always there and we both kicked dope togheter and is now living normal happy lives, with each other, and never been better so at least there is a happy part of my story...
 
jersey drape said:
Now here I am, doing well, and I feel a sense of guilt that I couldn't help her. But I had to do my thing because I had a lot of time over my head. I chose to do the right thing, she didn't. I told her to just fight through it with me, but she couldn't.

I think about her all the time. A lot of the time we were together is like a big haze of days flowing into each other but I remember so many great memories.

It's just the unfortunate part of this love we have with drugs....
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I know the feeling man, this is pretty much how it is for me too now.

I still think about her constantly, but our relationship is past the point of no return and she shows no signs of changing whereas I have made drastic changes in my life concerning my drug use in recent years.. Shitty spot to be in.
 
beta1 said:
I know the feeling man, this is pretty much how it is for me too now.

I still think about her constantly, but our relationship is past the point of no return and she shows no signs of changing whereas I have made drastic changes in my life concerning my drug use in recent years.. Shitty spot to be in.
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Yeah I just hoped that at the worst if it didn't work out between us, that she would at least be here for me to talk with and make sure she's doing alright, but that chance is gone... I still have all these letters that she was writing me while I was away. Letters from Rehab, stuff like that... They're filled with so much pain and despair that I almost want to get rid of them... But the handwriting is hers, and was something she physically did while alive, and there were real emotions being felt as she was writing them... So I just keep them away and every now and then look at them...
 
lacey k said:
.Turns out that very night he was using dope for teh first time in a few months of sobriety and ODing right when i was supposed to have been goin out there. i will enver forgive myself. RIP ..
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you know it's funny, she used to tell me that I had a death wish because of how I used... pretty crazy how things turned out... b ut we were so far out there that we would sort of take turns bringing each other back when we went too far with a shot... looking back now it's just nuts, and you see just a little time apart something tragic can happen... it shows you how fragile we are in that state even though we feel we're invincible. Glad to hear things are better between you and your man.
 
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