CamaroChick
Greenlighter
Hi y'all. Thanks to 3 herniated discs in my back and friends who said hey try a pain doc, here I am 3 years, 2 doctors and many hydro and perc later with a 60-75mg/daily oxy habit. I know this isn't considered severe by most people but to me, it is. I can't go 12 hours without the stuff. I hate how the WD feels. I'm not me anymore. And after a series of events in the last month, I have decided that I am done.
I was in a very bad car wreck (t boned in my Camaro by a buick doing 60mph) a month ago which further damaged my back. My doc upped me from 15mg 4x daily to 20mg 4x daily for 2 weeks, then back to 15. Of course, going back down to 15 didn't work, and when I tried honesty, they switched me to Nucynta. I had a terrible reaction to that stuff. I was hallucinating, itching, heart pounding, dizzy, nauseous. Doctor said it was withdrawal (I know the difference and it was not) after they assured me just that morning that I would not go into WD by switching. So they lied to me. Then refused to listen when I told them what was happening to me. He told me I needed to take a break from pain meds and to stop taking anything at all. No taper down, nothing. Just bye, come back in a week. He was cutting off other patients too and I have a sneaking suspicion that he got smacked by the DEA. This should be illegal, forcing me to be sick. I own my own business and cannot be sick like that.
This angered me obviously. But it also made me realize that my anger was misplaced. I've got a problem. And maybe I should try some other outlets before swimming in narcotics for the rest of my life.
I found a primary care doc (I just moved states so all my doctors are new ish), told him about everything. He was kind and understanding. He wants to try celebrex and steroids first. He gave me some percs to wean off the oxy but honestly I don't want them anymore.
Thus, the done part. I contacted a friend, who gave me 24 mg of suboxone. Dissolving 3mg as we speak now that full WD has hit after my dose last night. Wish me luck. I've never had to ask for help; I am usually stronger than this person. I can't wait to be me again. I would rather deal with a little pain than a lot of remorse and guilt... and narcotics.
I was in a very bad car wreck (t boned in my Camaro by a buick doing 60mph) a month ago which further damaged my back. My doc upped me from 15mg 4x daily to 20mg 4x daily for 2 weeks, then back to 15. Of course, going back down to 15 didn't work, and when I tried honesty, they switched me to Nucynta. I had a terrible reaction to that stuff. I was hallucinating, itching, heart pounding, dizzy, nauseous. Doctor said it was withdrawal (I know the difference and it was not) after they assured me just that morning that I would not go into WD by switching. So they lied to me. Then refused to listen when I told them what was happening to me. He told me I needed to take a break from pain meds and to stop taking anything at all. No taper down, nothing. Just bye, come back in a week. He was cutting off other patients too and I have a sneaking suspicion that he got smacked by the DEA. This should be illegal, forcing me to be sick. I own my own business and cannot be sick like that.
This angered me obviously. But it also made me realize that my anger was misplaced. I've got a problem. And maybe I should try some other outlets before swimming in narcotics for the rest of my life.
I found a primary care doc (I just moved states so all my doctors are new ish), told him about everything. He was kind and understanding. He wants to try celebrex and steroids first. He gave me some percs to wean off the oxy but honestly I don't want them anymore.
Thus, the done part. I contacted a friend, who gave me 24 mg of suboxone. Dissolving 3mg as we speak now that full WD has hit after my dose last night. Wish me luck. I've never had to ask for help; I am usually stronger than this person. I can't wait to be me again. I would rather deal with a little pain than a lot of remorse and guilt... and narcotics.
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