MisanthropyWoes
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Mar 7, 2013
- Messages
- 1
This post might end up being long, so I hope some of you can stick with it and respond with your opinions. I'd like to start by saying that I know what I did was dumb, so there's really no need to mock me in the responses. I've never posted anything on any drug site, I made this account just for this. I'm here for solace, or if the majority of you think I royally fucked up, then I'm simply here for confirmation. I can't keep teetering back and forth in my mind between thinking I'm okay and thinking my brain is a wasteland.
Okay, so, like anyone using this site, I smoked massive amounts of weed as a teen. I've also dabbled in pain-killers and amphetamines, and I've done DXM and LSD each 3 times. Just letting you know that I'm not a crazy druggie, but I'm not new to drugs either.
Fall semester of my sophomore year of college, fall of 2011, my buddies knew someone with molly, and of course I wanted to try it. Why not, Ya know? We pick the stuff up and head over to a pre-game with friends. About half an hour before we all leave for the party, we all drop .1. We are all pretty anxious because we just don't know what to expect, but holy shit! The first time you feel that particular high it's fucking indescribable.
A couple months later I met up with a friend from my high school for a concert. We are riding around, blunt cruising around the city, and he says he is about to pick up molly for one his friends, and asked if I wanted any. I was like fuck it, let's do it! This time it was .1 also. I could instantly tell that this molly was cut with something. The shit I got at my school was crystals, this stuff was a little discolored and just powder, but whatever. It was no where near as strong, but I still had an amazing time that night.
Next semester rolls around, spring 2012, and my friends from two doors down, also my ever-reliable weed dealers, told me they just got a shitload of molly and they were going to start dealing it. Part of me knew that this would lead to no good for any of us, but of course, I was like hell yea. And I'm not kidding when I say a shitload. I don't remember how much exactly in terms of weight, but it was a massive amount in a large zip-lock bag. Most likely more than 10 thousand bucks worth. Some fucking serious shit. A few weeks roll by and a few of my friends ask if I know anyone with molly. These chicks wanted some for their spring break. My friends sold me 3 grams, to sell to the girls, have a little left to sell to whoever, and end up with some free molly for myself.
Now to the incredibly stupid part. That night, I'm hanging with the dealers and a few girls we know. My one friend goes and grabs his huge fucking bag of molly and starts putting out lines for all of us. We each do a few small lines, enough to all hang out with each other and have a great time for a few hours. Later that night I went back home to call it a night. Those grams of molly I bought were just naggin at me. Alright, I'll do another line or two. Here's something you don't hear everyday, I went on a fucking molly binge that night. Every few hours, or more specifically, when I sensed a comedown, I would do a few more lines. I seriously have no idea what came over me. I'm a smart person, or at least I would consider myself smarter than your average person, and I feel like I'm very logical with common sense intact. But that night haunts me. I know better than that shit, I just did not think. I've done the same exact thing with amphetamines a few times. I'll get some adderall, and I won't think about the future, just the present, and proceed to eat them like skittles.
I just really can't trust myself with any kind of drug. I still don't know how much I went through that night, but if I had to guess, probably a gram went up my nose in the span of 10 hours. The next couple of weeks after that night were awful. Hell, I didn't feel good at all for several months, but the first week or two I was a zombie. My motivation dwindled to nothing. I was at my classes half the time because I just couldn't bring myself to go. Luckily for me, my grades didn't change at all, which is fucking astonishing. One of my roommates saw me the day right after that night, and he said that my eyes were just completely wide open, and that it was clearly evident that something was off. It scared me so badly that I quit drugs all together after that, even weed.
I've never done any more molly than what I've just said. I know that some people do way more overall than that. I just want to know if that one night was detrimental to my health or not. I always ask myself if that one night changed my personality or not, and it's truly impossible to know. It's been a little over a year since that night, and I feel okay in the head, and nothing crazy has happened with my body. And I know you people aren't neurologists or anything, but what do you think? Do you think that I fucked up my brain based on what I've said? It's really hard not to think about that night and the possible damage I inflicted upon myself.
Okay, so, like anyone using this site, I smoked massive amounts of weed as a teen. I've also dabbled in pain-killers and amphetamines, and I've done DXM and LSD each 3 times. Just letting you know that I'm not a crazy druggie, but I'm not new to drugs either.
Fall semester of my sophomore year of college, fall of 2011, my buddies knew someone with molly, and of course I wanted to try it. Why not, Ya know? We pick the stuff up and head over to a pre-game with friends. About half an hour before we all leave for the party, we all drop .1. We are all pretty anxious because we just don't know what to expect, but holy shit! The first time you feel that particular high it's fucking indescribable.
A couple months later I met up with a friend from my high school for a concert. We are riding around, blunt cruising around the city, and he says he is about to pick up molly for one his friends, and asked if I wanted any. I was like fuck it, let's do it! This time it was .1 also. I could instantly tell that this molly was cut with something. The shit I got at my school was crystals, this stuff was a little discolored and just powder, but whatever. It was no where near as strong, but I still had an amazing time that night.
Next semester rolls around, spring 2012, and my friends from two doors down, also my ever-reliable weed dealers, told me they just got a shitload of molly and they were going to start dealing it. Part of me knew that this would lead to no good for any of us, but of course, I was like hell yea. And I'm not kidding when I say a shitload. I don't remember how much exactly in terms of weight, but it was a massive amount in a large zip-lock bag. Most likely more than 10 thousand bucks worth. Some fucking serious shit. A few weeks roll by and a few of my friends ask if I know anyone with molly. These chicks wanted some for their spring break. My friends sold me 3 grams, to sell to the girls, have a little left to sell to whoever, and end up with some free molly for myself.
Now to the incredibly stupid part. That night, I'm hanging with the dealers and a few girls we know. My one friend goes and grabs his huge fucking bag of molly and starts putting out lines for all of us. We each do a few small lines, enough to all hang out with each other and have a great time for a few hours. Later that night I went back home to call it a night. Those grams of molly I bought were just naggin at me. Alright, I'll do another line or two. Here's something you don't hear everyday, I went on a fucking molly binge that night. Every few hours, or more specifically, when I sensed a comedown, I would do a few more lines. I seriously have no idea what came over me. I'm a smart person, or at least I would consider myself smarter than your average person, and I feel like I'm very logical with common sense intact. But that night haunts me. I know better than that shit, I just did not think. I've done the same exact thing with amphetamines a few times. I'll get some adderall, and I won't think about the future, just the present, and proceed to eat them like skittles.
I just really can't trust myself with any kind of drug. I still don't know how much I went through that night, but if I had to guess, probably a gram went up my nose in the span of 10 hours. The next couple of weeks after that night were awful. Hell, I didn't feel good at all for several months, but the first week or two I was a zombie. My motivation dwindled to nothing. I was at my classes half the time because I just couldn't bring myself to go. Luckily for me, my grades didn't change at all, which is fucking astonishing. One of my roommates saw me the day right after that night, and he said that my eyes were just completely wide open, and that it was clearly evident that something was off. It scared me so badly that I quit drugs all together after that, even weed.
I've never done any more molly than what I've just said. I know that some people do way more overall than that. I just want to know if that one night was detrimental to my health or not. I always ask myself if that one night changed my personality or not, and it's truly impossible to know. It's been a little over a year since that night, and I feel okay in the head, and nothing crazy has happened with my body. And I know you people aren't neurologists or anything, but what do you think? Do you think that I fucked up my brain based on what I've said? It's really hard not to think about that night and the possible damage I inflicted upon myself.
