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  • TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | paranoid android

HELP , i have a crazy person in my life

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Legerity said:
Doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results?

My comment has nothing to do with whether or not his actions are rational or "sane" as you or I define it, but that there seems to be a general lack of compassion.

It is irrelevant whether or not somebody here choses to listen to our advice. I am not such an important person that posting a reply is a waste of my time because somebody doesn't do what I think they should. I come here to learn from others and to share my own experience, whether anybody gives a shit about what I have to say is their issue, not mine.
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I agree, think people do care though, but their own frustration is getting the better of them(Have done it myself). Jake has the right to post ,without being a scapegoat for anyones frustration, just like everyone else does. If he's not taking your advice (however helpful it may be!) thats his choice and he shouldnt be judged for it...just let him make up his own mind!
 
<snip>

On that note, this has turned into a very
ugly thread that is rife with people
stabbing other people in the back and
throwing things in peoples faces that
happened at an obvious low moment of
someones life. ... That's not how I roll
so ill leave yall to it.

Jake, I hope things work out for you and
that sometime, in the very near future,
you can make a decision that can be healthy
for all parties involved :)
 
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Listen, people are being way too combative here.
I understand the frustrations being voiced about putting energy into a person who you feel is not receptive- but please do not make personal attacks.
If you feel you can't offer, or that the advice or support you can offer will not be taken, do not reply.
If things do not change VERY quickly in this thread, I am closing it.



I UA'ed a number of posts that were personal attacks.


Jake, my suggestion would be to seek professional help. I know you see someone but call them up and schedule an appt.
You've been given great advice here and on other threads- If you want to improve your life- take the advice or see a professional. BL can not solve your problems for you. You need to do it yourself.
 
I feel your pain my man. I am sort of seeing this girl who is obsessed with me. She does all this crazy shit: for example, I had a panic attack and had to leave her house and go home. My whole drive home she was texting me this crazy shit about death and blood and cutting and how she is going out of her mind and everything in her house reminds her of me and she had to go home to her parents and I'm sure told them that I was the bad guy in the situation.

What about ME? I had a fucking PANIC ATTACK, and I'm supposed to feel bad for her because she can't see me? Shouldn't she be worried about me instead of seeking attention for herself?

I don't see her much after that incident, but every time I see her she has cut marks all over her arms and I know it's because of me.

And after every phone call she starts crying and has to take crazy amounts of medication.

And now she has stopped shaving her legs completely and they are so fucking gross. She is falling apart because I am not there to fix all her problems, BUT I CAN BARELY TAKE CARE OF MY FUCKING SELF.
 
Hun, you seem to be keeping her confused also. She is a person with ALOT of serious problems way to big for you to handle. You say you don't love her, so why in the hell tell her you do hun??? That is very wrong and cruel. You need to quit her cold turkey and if not just deal with WHATEVER she brings your way. YOU control your destiny not other people, whether they claim they are going to kill themselves or not. It's time you take control of your life back. Go and find some happiness, life is way to freakin short :))
 
MeddieFrac said:
I feel your pain my man. I am sort of seeing this girl who is obsessed with me. She does all this crazy shit: for example, I had a panic attack and had to leave her house and go home. My whole drive home she was texting me this crazy shit about death and blood and cutting and how she is going out of her mind and everything in her house reminds her of me and she had to go home to her parents and I'm sure told them that I was the bad guy in the situation.

What about ME? I had a fucking PANIC ATTACK, and I'm supposed to feel bad for her because she can't see me? Shouldn't she be worried about me instead of seeking attention for herself?

I don't see her much after that incident, but every time I see her she has cut marks all over her arms and I know it's because of me.

And after every phone call she starts crying and has to take crazy amounts of medication.


And now she has stopped shaving her legs completely and they are so fucking gross. She is falling apart because I am not there to fix all her problems, BUT I CAN BARELY TAKE CARE OF MY FUCKING SELF.
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Your taking far too much credit for being the cause of this woman's issues. She has some serious mental health issues, just like the Op's female friend. Being alone is far healthier than being with a person who treats you like that. Believing that your the cause of their actions is irrational thinking. Staying involved in situations like these are purely voluntary choices and extremely self destructive. The easiest way out is to be honest, while it may not be what they want to hear, it'll leave your concious and pride intact.
 
Why one of my posts was apparently UA'd and
some of these other rude ass posts wernt is
beyond me. ... Mine wasn't even rude, like..
at all, but okay. :)
 
^I've inadvertently UAed the wrong posts before when I modded. Its pretty easy to do when you are working with a thread that had a lot of stuff going awry.You can always PM a mod if you need an explanation on stuff like that.
 
what is crazy is tonight i decided i was done with her , told her that , then an hour later was craying telling her i love her .......................its an addiction to me just like heroin
 
Talking about the guy in the third person like he isn't even here seems kinda rude and disrespectful.

Jumping all over someone and ripping him apart because he's conflicted and unsure of his next move is uncalled for. Some of you seem quite bitter because your (well-intentioned) advice isn't being taken. Is that really a reasonable position?

This "crazy" girl is a human being and once a person is involved in your life it can be difficult to just ditch them and forget about them like they are yesterday's newspaper. If potential romantic feelings are involved it can complicate things even further.

Empathy is a skill worth cultivating.
 
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that's our problem. and it's been handled. drop it.

and one can only do so much for another. and some people are beyond the level of help that one can realistically provide.
being empathetic is fine, but self-preservation *should* be more important. if it's not, OFW.

toxic relationships *can't* just be turned off. I'm not saying they can.
but what does happen is when the toxic element is removed, it provides a different prospective on priorities. human relationships are, sometimes unfortunately, really complex & interwoven with their lives.

but the only person an individual can truly fix is themselves. it just takes effort and determination.
 
First things first because I got lost in here. Do you love her or do you not love her? In your first post you wrote you had told her you hadn't loved her. This is where it begins. If you had no greater feelings towards her than compassion, you wouldn't be in this so deep, I guess. I understood that she expects love from you. If you love her, then why don't you admit that? It'd be a lot easier.
 
Hey Ixchellian...I suggest you "drop" the preachy self-righteous act.

Feel free to disagree with my take on events but don't tell me what I should or shouldn't be posting.
 
Dopamine- Just ignore the people who you feel are talking crap, some people want to dominate with their point of view and feeding into it aint worth it! ;) Its been turning into a High-school scenario because of Ego's and grandiosity. All the while the real meaning of the Thread as set by the O.P. has been negated.
 
i really dont understand y all the people with negative comments bother posting in here. Jake is here for help and advice so if you cant offer then DONT fuckin post. Open up ur own damn thread and talk to yourself because when u will need help or advice one day ull get shit in return.
 
totach said:
i really dont understand y all the people with negative comments bother posting in here. Jake is here for help and advice so if you cant offer then DONT fuckin post. Open up ur own damn thread and talk to yourself because when u will need help or advice one day ull get shit in return.
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Quoted for truth.
 
I am closing this thread.
I posted yesterday that this thread would be closed if it did not change direction-

This is shameful .
We have had to edit and UA many posts, and there were many more that walked a fine line.
When people post in TDS it is for help, support and sympathy.
If you can not offer that, or feel your offering has been ignored and you are not happy about it, do not continue to post in a thread to belittle, shame or hurt another member.
The TDS Guidelines have been ignored here and this thread has been completely derailed.

For those of you who brought negativity into this thread-
Think before you post, and be sure to go over the TDS Guidelines.

In the future- Let's remember that TDS is a place to be kind, supportive, respectful and open.
We want it to be a place to come OUT of the negativity, not spread the negativity.


I appreciate those of you who have been kind here and I am sorry you had to deal with all the rudeness.
 
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