Help for Friend Hooked on K

JosephTHeSequel

Bluelighter
Joined
Oct 29, 2001
Messages
3,390
Location
left coast
Sorry if this is not the correct forum, been years since I have posted regularly on here. Used to just be a few boards.

Anyways, have a friend that is hooked on K... Does it casually, on weeknights etc... Him and his friends even picked some up before a viewing the other night, wtf?

He has just become someone else... Him and that K crowd are complete space cases. I feel like I cannot even have conversations with him anymore because he is just so lost, so out there.

And I am kind of out there myself. Anyone been in a similar situation and have and advice?
 
Sorry to hear about your friend and how the relationship has changed, it's never fun that's for sure. I've had numerous friends/relationships that went this way, a few times I was even playing the role of your friend (only difference is K was never the drug, usually heroin or E).

*This is just my opinion or experience by no means am I telling you what to do, you seem like a smart cat*
If they are a close friend, someone you would confide in, go into laughing fits with etc, then I would prepare yourself and get them alone with you. If you think the K is damaging his life, or will end up that way then let him know. Have a serious conversation, regardless of how uncomfortable it may be. Let them know how you feel. But importantly focus on why they are going this route. Do they have a void they are trying to fill, are they depressed, or feel alone? Again, every situation is different and I'm sure others will have differing opinions.

If he is isnt a super close friend, but was still a good buddy, I would still let him know how you feel.

Example: I had/have a buddy who I considered my best friend for a solid 4 years. We went to high school together, college together, and after college lived in the same city (we didn't live together though.) He started getting into drugs casually during college. Slowly it grew from casual to abuse or addiction. It wasn't any particular drug, he just wanted to get high all the time, on anything he could. Hell he once made crack in his family's kitchen...... eventually it became a heroin addiction. I would do drugs with him sometimes, but once I felt I was enabling his behavior I stopped doing drugs while hanging out with him, but he still did them. He would beg for rides to his dealers house, ask for money, or claim I owed him money when I didn't because he needed to cop a sack. It got bad.

The worst part was that when he was sober, he was the coolest fucking guy. But when he was high, he became a total asshole, another person. Anyways, long story short, after rehab multiple times, and relapse every time, his other good friend and I basically said either stop, or consider our friendship over. To our face, he chose the drugs.

It pains me daily. We tried to help more times than I can count in so many different ways.

It can be a personal thing for you Joseph. Do you enjoy your time with him still? I would try my best to help him out. But life is never fair, and he is his own person. Better not to let yourself go mad, or get hurt, because of someone else. I wish I could provide better help or advice.

But you aren't alone. I've lost plenty of friends, girlfriends and even had a falling out with a sibling (luckily I repaired that one) to shit like that. At the very least, tell them exactly how you feel, and offer them help.

I wish you the best, just know that even if it doesn't work out for the best, I'll bet you have plenty to still be happy and thankful for.
 
yeah I agree. Give him a couple of chances, try to help him find the root cause of his addiction, and then try to help him solve that problem.
...but be prepared for the eventuality that it might not work. Then, sometimes you have to end a relationship, tough as it reads.
 
never give up on a friend fuck what the guy above me says.
never stop being there for him, you never know he could always make a recovery even if he's never fully back to himself
 
well, sorry if i sounded heartless, but i was just considereing a situation like Solipsis described:

he just wanted to get high all the time, on anything he could. Hell he once made crack in his family's kitchen...... eventually it became a heroin addiction. I would do drugs with him sometimes, but once I felt I was enabling his behavior I stopped doing drugs while hanging out with him, but he still did them. He would beg for rides to his dealers house, ask for money, or claim I owed him money when I didn't because he needed to cop a sack. It got bad.

The worst part was that when he was sober, he was the coolest fucking guy. But when he was high, he became a total asshole, another person. Anyways, long story short, after rehab multiple times, and relapse every time, his other good friend and I basically said either stop, or consider our friendship over. To our face, he chose the drugs.

It pains me daily. We tried to help more times than I can count in so many different ways.

But life is never fair, and he is his own person. Better not to let yourself go mad, or get hurt, because of someone else. I wish I could provide better help or advice.

help as much as you can, but if you find yourself in a parasitic situation... i see no good on staying in a relation ship with parasite friend... for how long are we supposed to help a friend who just behaves as a parasite, taking all we give him but giving back just pain and poison...? sometimes the time it takes to recover is longer than a lifetime... and to spend your life in such a futile endeavour can traumatise anyone and destroy the life of the helper too, wasted on a futile intent of saving someone who doesn't want ot be saved...
 
K scares me. It really changes your personality. Certainly let him know that you care. Don't blatantly give up on him but it really sounds like he is pushing the limit...asking you for money is inappropriate. And he needs to know that. Since you guys are so close give him so e literature on K abuse...some addicts end up on dialysis because it fucks up your kidneys.

But in the end...he is his own person. If he wants to blow his real friends off and K-hole all day without any regard to his health then he will do it. Don't emotionally turn your back on him I'm sure he will need a good friend like you if/when he comes to his senses. But it's obvious this is toxic and you don't know when he will truly push the limit. Addiction turns people into something they are not. So dont feel like you should hang around with him if he tries to use you to get drugs or if it's too hard to watch him hurt himself. Remember, you gotta watch out for #1. The best thing you can do for yourself is the opposite of what he's doing.
 
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