Hello

[iswhatitis]

I don't know if I have come to the right place. Maybe you all can tell me. I was struggling a bit today and come across this site. The struggles of recovery are dominating my day.

 

[theotherside]

You have come to the right place. We all struggle with addictions of all different kinds. I'm addicted to opiates and stimulants, and it is an everyday battle. Check out our The Dark Side forum for tons of information on recoveryand tips to stay clean. Sometimes all we need to do is share with others to not relapse. Welcome to Bluelight

 

[Captain.Heroin]

Welcome to Bluelight! There are a lot of people here in recovery so you came to the right place.

Best of luck!

 

[iswhatitis]

Thank you for the welcome. I was having a good morning... I was until my boyfriend announced that no xmas money would go to the dope man. I was stuck in this mood of all sorts of anger

 

[iswhatitis]

until I persuaded him otherwise and we copped. Now I feel worse because I didn't get anything out of it because I am on methadone AND more importantly I got him to use again when he didnt want to begin with...

 

[iswhatitis]

I feel like methadone has only made my feelings towards heroin more difficult to overcome. Is

 

[iswhatitis]

anyone going through this? (Methadone making cravings for dope stronger.)

 

[theotherside]

I've always been into weaker stuff like hydro's, morphine, oxy....methadone seems to either be a wonder drug for some, or a disaster for othersl. Have you tried subs?

 

[iswhatitis]

Well in the beginning it was a miracle and still is for various reasons. It saved me from homlessness and saved many relationships. But now I find myself hating it because I can't get high. I have tried subs but every time I get some I just use them as a safety net so I can't get sick when I fail to cop.

 

[iswhatitis]

Also, I have been getting side effects from methadone that are extremely painful. I have developed extreme pain that resembles RA. Keep in mind I am only 24.

 

[theotherside]

Make sure and check out the dark side forum or use the search engine.....they are the forums for the "real" talk about methadone for example. Don't be afraid to start a thread....people will be nice.

 

[Captain.Heroin]

Maybe you should taper off of methadone and avoid scoring heroin.

Don't feel bad that your boyfriend did heroin, eventually he'll have to stand up and say no and not cave in if he's going to stay clean.

I hope everything works out for the best!