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  • NMI Moderators: Snafu in the Void

Hello from San Francisco

PattiSmythe said:
Hey! Nice to meet you! You miss it here? I can't imagine living anywhere else that be honest, despite it's problems.
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I certainly miss people and places and jogging along grizzly peak every day, not the traffic, homeless and cost of living though.
 
Las vegas is a bit if a way away from SF!

...I don't generally go over to the east bay. Most of my friends live around civic center and TL. I'm fine, it's pretty comfortable and I'll be able to afford to move out soon. Really quite sad how people see all homeless as scum - we really are not, it's just people struggle...esp if they have a drug use issue..
 
PattiSmythe said:
Las vegas is a bit if a way away from SF!

...I don't generally go over to the east bay. Most of my friends live around civic center and TL. I'm fine, it's pretty comfortable and I'll be able to afford to move out soon. Really quite sad how people see all homeless as scum - we really are not, it's just people struggle...esp if they have a drug use issue..
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I have experienced homelessness. I do not look at them as scum. Homeless in SF are different than other places and I've lived all over. They are literally aggressive and harassing. In my overwhelming experience. It gives a bad name to the city. The bay does a horrible job at managing the issue IMO

I basically lived on the streets and telegraph av for years.

My opinion on the subject is fairly complex I guess.
 
I get treated like absolute trash once people know I'm homeless, I've got a kid too, and it's been a really hard 8 months. I've been street homeless in the past for 5 plus years. Yes, some people are cracked out and crazy, but it's so upsetting when people just look down on sf homeless folk. I'm sorry to hear you had issues too, hope things are good for you now.
 
...and even I get chased, hassled and attacked occasionally. Just big city stuff. NYC is worse, being homeless rurally is more gentle.
 
PattiSmythe said:
I get treated like absolute trash once people know I'm homeless, I've got a kid too, and it's been a really hard 8 months. I've been street homeless in the past for 5 plus years. Yes, some people are cracked out and crazy, but it's so upsetting when people just look down on sf homeless folk. I'm sorry to hear you had issues too, hope things are good for you now.
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I know I've experienced it myself. I look down on no one, these are my peers and brothers.

My issue is with the politics of it, how the city handles the problem, not the problem itself.

And I'm fairly burnt out by it all. Lived there 9 years but couldn't wait to leave. I live a lot more comfortable life now.

I have a complicated relationship with the bay and the years I spent there, heh.

Trust me I'm not some asshole with a briefcase giving you dirty looks... I'm like you, on your side here.

Anyways I didn't really mean to steer this into a discussion about that.

How are you doing? If you need some people to talk to you're definitely in the right place.
 
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I'm ok. Finding it hard to stay clean. Hate weed, but what else to do, huh. My oldest friend basically decided he had had enough and has been on one hell of a run, it's hard to watch. I have to pretend I'm ok when I'm not.
Thanks snafu, I do get what you mean. Heck getting chased by half naked raging men is not fun for anyone, I can't walk outside without being scared, this block is hyper violent, but like you say, these people are my brothers and sisters. I get a bit protective over them.
 
PattiSmythe said:
I'm ok. Finding it hard to stay clean. Hate weed, but what else to do, huh. My oldest friend basically decided he had had enough and has been on one hell of a run, it's hard to watch. I have to pretend I'm ok when I'm not.
Thanks snafu, I do get what you mean. Heck getting chased by half naked raging men is not fun for anyone, I can't walk outside without being scared, this block is hyper violent, but like you say, these people are my brothers and sisters. I get a bit protective over them.
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We can all relate here to varying degrees. I'm in a bad spot myself with my use and mental illnesses popping off like it's 1969... However I'm lucky I have a house to stay in for at least a few more months. I am waiting on my state benefits to kick in, needed badly. (Living in NC now)

Feel free to check out the forums and explore. Bit of everything here. Check out The Dark Side and Recovery forums. We are a very supportive and understanding community.

Keep your head up, believe things will be better soon for both you and your child, and I promise I will do my best to do the same :)

Welcome to BL 🤗
 
We are holding on, so glad you have somewhere to stay a while longer. It's so hard getting into settled stable housing.
It's really difficult living here, in the middle of an open air market situation. I've held on, but it's so hard. Thank you for being so welcoming, sorry I'm so defensive...we really get a lot of hassle and it's made me grouchy when I'm not really grouchy. Hold on in there! 🤗
 
PattiSmythe said:
We are holding on, so glad you have somewhere to stay a while longer. It's so hard getting into settled stable housing.
It's really difficult living here, in the middle of an open air market situation. I've held on, but it's so hard. Thank you for being so welcoming, sorry I'm so defensive...we really get a lot of hassle and it's made me grouchy when I'm not really grouchy. Hold on in there! 🤗
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Stay strong. I'm the type of person who would offer to help if I still lived on that side of the country.
 
Hey @PattiSmythe
Welcome to Bluelight. :)

So what brings you around to Bluelight?
When you said you had quit doing opiates and such, how did you do it?
 
Hi, I've been clean 3 years this time around, last period of use was oxy and morphine, Mainly, Dilaudid when it came around...IV and plugging the morphine because of the anti abuse tech in the pills, they gel badly. Before that on and off for a long time, iv heroin. I stopped because everything was fent and I hate it...plus I don't want to die. Lost too many people.

I don't even touch pod tea or Kratom any more.

Occasionally used speed etc, but stimulants aren't my thing really.

I'm watching someone I care about go all in. Crack. Meth. Booze. It's twitching me out. I'm at a distance but I care deeply, that's said it's so hard for me. Im struggling to stay clean, my boundaries are loosening. Been smoking weed, but that's it. I can't drink.

I'm working really hard, I have to make things ok for my kid...

Man, sorry, feel like I'm over sharing.
 
Snafu of the Forest said:
I have experienced homelessness. I do not look at them as scum. Homeless in SF are different than other places and I've lived all over. They are literally aggressive and harassing. In my overwhelming experience. It gives a bad name to the city. The bay does a horrible job at managing the issue IMO

I basically lived on the streets and telegraph av for years.

My opinion on the subject is fairly complex I guess.
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I was just in SF, went over over telegraph like you suggested. Met a really nice homeless woman,older, she took me in to hang out with her homeless "family", they were all cool as fuck, we went into their squat and everyone watched each other's back. These people wouldn't have been aggressive to anyone
 
PattiSmythe said:
I stopped because everything was fent and I hate it...plus I don't want to die. Lost too many people.
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This. This so much. Fent SUCKS as a high in general and took too many of my friends.

PattiSmythe said:
I don't even touch pod tea or Kratom any more.

Occasionally used speed etc, but stimulants aren't my thing really.
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That's awesome. Not even kratom?

I can relate to using meth here and there. It was never my DOC like that. But something I still stay away from because it's an arm hair length from opiates and other bad situations.

PattiSmythe said:
I'm watching someone I care about go all in. Crack. Meth. Booze. It's twitching me out. I'm at a distance but I care deeply, that's said it's so hard for me. Im struggling to stay clean, my boundaries are loosening. Been smoking weed, but that's it. I can't drink.

I'm working really hard, I have to make things ok for my kid...

Man, sorry, feel like I'm over sharing.
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Please do not feel like you're oversharing. Trust me. I've spilled my entire guts to these forums with very personal shit. People on this forum know me better than my best friends and family.

You may be surprised how friendly and welcoming we are, especially to people with your life experience. We're all love here. Trust me.

I'm really glad you're here and want you to open up and explore BL :)

I think we have a lot to offer you both in advice and community/support.
 
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