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Hello everyone. This is my fourth attempt at an intro

S

Sleep and Fall

Greenlighter
Joined
Dec 7, 2011
Messages
19
All the other attempts were destroyed when my internet connection quit on me. I have crappy internet. It's so bad that I've been longing to inject heroin to kill the pain of a really crappy net connection. Oh, yeah I've had a heroin addiction thingy for the past six years or so.

First tried the stuff 25 years ago. Used it occasionally over the years. Was pretty damn careful. Then oops. About six years ago fell in way over my head. But really I think it was the year on methadone that did the most damage to my brain chemistry.

So anyhow, I'm a 42 year old guy who has done lots of drugs over lots of years. Got in trouble with legally prescribed dexedrine many years ago. Made me go completely insane. That was easy to quit forever. Also had a few phases of smoking way too much crack. That was much harder to kick, but once I got over it - I was over it for good. Also had a lesser problem (still a problem though) with snorting cocaine later. That was hard to quit because I'd get drunk and walking home took me right past the corner boys with the 20 bags and I'd want to get high to keep the night going. But eventually I found an easy way to quit snorting cocaine. Heroin. Once I started doing it every day I lost interest in cocaine. Wow! A cure for cocaine problems? I've discovered a wonder drug!

Yeah. So I've been doing the thing where you take suboxone to get through heroin withdrawal and then maintain on it for a while and then go back for a run on heroin and then back to suboxone and then back to heroin and then....

Seems like life was easier when my drugs of choice were pot and acid. I remember laughing at my cocaine using friends in the eighties turning down pot because it would mess up their buzz. Actually I would have gladly stayed a pothead but something changed inside me. Pot started making me paranoid. Even then it took me a while to realize that it was the pot that was destroying my good time with paranoia and anxiety.

Ok, so that's my intro. Hope you enjoyed it. I feel like I have a lot to say here. I'll try to do so in the proper way.

On a final note, let me just say that I'd be happy enough if they just fully legalized dried opium poppy pods. Poppy straw tea might actually be good enough for me to maintain on that instead of heroin. But with the law being the way it is - nebulous - prices of dried pods over the internet are astronomical. Wish I had some land to grow my own. Wish there were no drug laws so at least my dope shooting friends wouldn't have to die because of unclean inconsistent black market dope. Or me. I might die that way. And if I do, I hope somebody will have the prescience to blame the drug laws. And not just me. Because... well, you know.

They really seem to hate us, don't they?
 
Welcome aboard, SaF :)

Have you ever tried or looked into Kratom?
You may get some use from it.
 
That's a great intro. Very intruiging. You should come check ot The Dark Side (link located in my signature), it's a great community for addicts and recovering addicts, and overall a wonderful community :) I really hope to see you there.
 
Welcome to the light man!

Any questions? Feel free to to ask :)
 
Thanks for the kind replies. Never heard of that Kratom stuff. My eyes lit up when I read the word agonist on the wiki page. And, ok badfish, I'll check out your dark side. Sorta feel like some existential whining today.
 
Questions? How about this one: What is the easy and best way to keep track of threads I post in? Preferably without having to get email notices (which could blow my whole double life scene if seen by the wrong eyes).

Oh, and Laika, I just ordered some Kratom. From what I'm reading I can't understand how I never heard of this stuff before. I'm hoping the Kratom will arrive in time to help me avoid yet another ill timed and ultra expensive run on heroin. Thanks.
 
Anytime man, Glad it's going to help you. I must also recommend you stay away from the extracts as they don't work as well. :)

Also if you go to your settings, On the left you will see General Settings, choose that and scroll down to the Subscriptions options. Choose the one that says "Through my control panel only."
Now whenever a thread you posted in has a new post in it, the thread will appear in your "Settings"
You can also see a list of all subscriptions you belong to on the left of your Settings.

If you would like to subscribe to a thread without posting in it, then at the top of the thread you will see a drop down menu that has "Thread Tools" on it. The last option on that list is to subscribe to the thread.
Hope this helps :)
 
Glad I could be of assistance :)

So are you finding your way around the forum pretty well?
 
Yeah, I'm finding my way around pretty well. My only problem is that my posts tend to be eaten by my awful net connection before they reach bluelight. I'm going to have to remember to start saving them in a text window before I try submitting. It's actually been sorta comforting to read through some of these threads. Maybe it reminds me that I'm not the only intelligent person going through such things. I'm awfully isolated where I live now in the midwest USA.

Also, I'm not exactly sure why. Maybe it was the small amount of pod tea, but I seemed to have graduated from nasty PAWS to low level but actual withdrawal symtoms this week. Or maybe it's all in my head. I can't wait for my kratom to arrive. At the moment I'm very thankful to my best friend here who called in a favor from one of her friends which put some pain pills in my hands to get through the next couple of days.

Oops. That's probably off topic for an into, right? If so, sorry.
 
I have a brilliant idea just for you!

Sleep and Fall said:
My only problem is that my posts tend to be eaten by my awful net connection before they reach bluelight. I'm going to have to remember to start saving them in a text window before I try submitting. It's actually been sorta comforting to read through some of these threads. Maybe it reminds me that I'm not the only intelligent person going through such things. I'm awfully isolated where I live now in the midwest USA.
Click to expand...
Do you have Firefox? Because you need Lazarus!
 
Welcome!!! Glad you finally were able to complete your intro! I know how frustrating computer problems can be! :)
If you would like to help Bluelight in a big way,you could take a few minutes and complete the Inflexxion Survey,which provides much needed support for Bluelight.
I provided the think for you. Just click on the link in the previous sentence and you are there. it is quick,easy and anonymous!
If you have any question,don't hesitate to PM me or ANY staff member. We are here to help!!! :D

Much peace and love...............................skillz =D
 
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