grimmrizzo
Greenlighter
Hello, I go by Rizzo on and off the interwebs. I have been an avid user about 11 years. OP is 26, I started smoking ganja when i was 12, and after finding a website called erowid, OP made it his mission to experience all most frequently used substances by the time he finished high school. Came close to accomplishing that mission (except for heroin and IV use). But lead to 9 months in rehab for cocaine addiction and developed a love for opiates. But was generally known just as a stoner, until OP joined the Marine Corps. Fast forward several years and developed and on again off again relationship with oxy and alcohol, which turned into heroin, but never IV. Then last year while on a job out of state, aquired a pretty heft crystal habit, but maintained it in a more responsible way i believe. I was doing about a g a day, but ate every day (kept my weight up) and forced myself to sleep even if it was just a 30 min nap. But, never really cared for enough to call it my DOC. When someone offered me the chance to IV meth i accepted because i justified that I didnt like the substance enough to get hooked on the needle. And I didnt. But I became comftorable with using a needle. After being gone for 6 months out of state, i came home from my job to find my wife in bed with someone else. I immediatly decided to begin to use heroin with a needle. I was not able to control the sickness, but the emotional damaged i had recived made me not care. After 6 months I became very depressed between being dope sickness and constant battles with my then and still current wife and her boyfriend, and i ended up in jail. The reason why I was in jail in the first place was because I OD'd on some H that i'm pretty sure was cut with fent. In all honestly though it was a botched suicide attempt. OP had a cheating lying wife that drove OP to suicide. Some may call OP a weak person, but to go into detail about what OP's wife of 6 years did to him would bring most to tears. Still thats no excuse for one to contemplate suicide and OP is very thankful for Narcan and hope that people of bluelight arent as judgmental as joe blow on the street. OP hopes that this is a place that he can come and have an outlet to share experiences and maybe find like minded people who have been in similar situations and can discuss things freely without fear of judgement and trolling. Thanks again. The later part of this post is copied from a previous post, thats why it seems a little out of continuation. Well that sums it up in a nutshell. BTW i'm not super depressed or feelling like killing myself. I did 60 days in jail and that was exaclly what OP needed to get out of his feelings. OP just needs to get laid now and would be good to go. lol
