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heart break and insanity

dazedraver

dazedraver

Bluelighter
Joined
Mar 27, 2000
Messages
3,012
Location
Bahrain
I sold my soul to school,
I sold my soul to my dreary routine,
I sold my soul to the woman I lost,
I sold my soul to the government,
I sold my soul for my parents hopes and dreams,
now my heart is tattered and torn at the seams,
I lost my mind for that sad girl's love,
I lost my heart to that bright girls eyes,
I lost my sanity for that final kiss,
I lost my love and source of bliss.
I had no faith so I carry no cross
I have no hope so all is a loss.
I once had a dream but then it was false,
I lost my imagination and found all hope is lost.
I lost my soul because of worries and strife,
I lost my mind because of she lost her life.
I lost my love to that cylindical fiend,
I only hope her soul has been redeemed.
my mind is muddled and heart is broken,
alas I know now I should have spoken,
I saw the subtle changes in her face,
but I possesed her no more so it "wasn't my place."
so I sit and stew inside my mind,
hoping it's my santiy and soul I'll find.
No more guilt or prejudice
My sins are of indifferice
through meditiation and review
I'll wonder if there was there was a way I could construe
my love and devotion that you outgrew.
sorry about the depressing subject matter, but recently an old wound has been opened fresh and this drivel is what came forth
 
well, to stick to the depressing things, i feel i know where you're coming from, and its a shame that people go through this sh*t that life can sometimes seem.
the following is something i wrote last night, and im not sure if you will get much out of it, but this is from the perspective of me. the girl who loved so much, but it was'nt returned, and i just had to let go.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
one day the hurt will go,
one day my soul will glow
one day i will find love
one day i'll soar above
one day you might see,
all that i am, all that i be.
and one day, maybe you will realise
the mistake that you made,
by letting me go out of your life
and realise the price you payed.
i am god damn fucking beautiful.
i hate it how you cant see me
but thats something that perhaps,
one day will fade.
and i wont have tears
over memories of regrets.
how is it that i feel your loss,
more then you yourself could feel?
how is it that i see all that i AM
all that i could have been,
and feel the regret you might never feel?
can i call it an un-told past?
or future?
how many lives must pass us by
before we are both ready?
how many times must we meet and love
before it becomes what i know it could be?
how can you NOT see me?
im standing right in front of you.
i guess its may be the wrong lifetime.
i hope you never see me for what i AM.
i hope you never love me.
i hope you never expereince this.
i hope your love is never helplessly lost
i hope your heart is never un-seen.
i hope that you live your life in total innocence
of everything i have potential to be.
i hope you NEVER turn around.
and realsie that i am the one.
i hope you can never say,
that i was the one that got away.
but know this, i will die loving you,
and you know that our stars exist side by side.
and you know that everything that i am,
and even though the realisations havent hit home,
one lifetime we will be together.
and lay, under the stars
with the knowledge of our love.
if we were without love, there would BE no universe.
so take your life beautifully
and have an excelent journey.
i wll see you somewhere in the cosmos
where will will dance on the blaze of a comet,
i know that our love is the purest.
and even, if not in this life time,
we will find each other yet again.
and love will be the binding conclusion.
the force that can not be denied.
just fall asleep knowing i love you.
and as i kiss your forehead goodnight,
as i walk out of the front door,
as i pass under the street lights,
and out into the great unknown,
the love will never die.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
peace to you daze, i hope that someday, somehow, in whichever coner of the universe, you find your peace, and KNOW that your love is so big and beautiful and strong, that it can be seen like a cluster of stars, and even through all the pain and hurt, be tahnkfull that you are ALIVE and that you are finding the peace in yourself to deal with the pain.
also, i wnat to apologise if im out of line here in anyway.
but we find strength in the carried burden, and hope in new perspectives.
much love.
xox wiSdoMiKaL
------------------
be, simply, YOU...
and love, eternally, yourself :)
 
hey sweetie,
Sorry for you re-open turmoil,, but please keep your chin up !! you know you are loved !
call me if you need too,!! you know my number !
------------------
Just takes one angel to change a life
~~~~CHERUB~~~~
Aka: Mommyhen
 
thanks guys
wiz - thanks alot and i wish you the best, glad to see someone elses has been here
cherub thanks babe you know i luv ya sweety and I'll call when i can i just need to muddle though this shit again.
smilez
jj
 
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