Have you ever been addicted to something that makes you mostly feel like shit?

[nznity]

Iv cocaine. Most def.
the high feels like you're about to die, massive comedown and horrible side effects.
Yet I couldn't stop doing another dose once I started, at the end I was mostly doing it to harm myself. It wasn't for fun anymore.
I nearly died on multiple occasions consuming that crap, never try it kids.

 

[jasperkent]

Was it like that for you with alcohol -?

I did medical detox + rehab (inpatient & outpatient) seven times over the years, with varying degrees of true sobriety that lasted from a few days to six months to 1 year, 2 years, and 3 years, not necessarily in that order.

This last time something was different. It was not the lowest bottom I'd hit, far from it. Something just clicked. I'm done and I know I'm done and that's that.

I cannot explain it. I wish I could-- I wish there was some trick I could share. If I could, I'd save countless lives and prevent a lot of suffering...and I'd be a very rich man. But for whatever reason I simply got to a point where I'd had enough.

What I  can share with anybody who will listen is this: Never give up. If you are still breathing, you still have a chance.

I was convinced that I was a hopeless case, yet I never stopped trying.

 

[Babygirl25]

I did medical detox + rehab (inpatient & outpatient) seven times over the years, with varying degrees of true sobriety that lasted from a few days to six months to 1 year, 2 years, and 3 years, not necessarily in that order.

This last time something was different. It was not the lowest bottom I'd hit, far from it. Something just clicked. I'm done and I know I'm done and that's that.

I cannot explain it. I wish I could-- I wish there was some trick I could share. If I could, I'd save countless lives and prevent a lot of suffering...and I'd be a very rich man. But for whatever reason I simply got to a point where I'd had enough.

What I  can share with anybody who will listen is this: Never give up. If you are still breathing, you still have a chance.

I was convinced that I was a hopeless case, yet I never stopped trying.

That's exactly how it was for me with heroin. Something just clicked and I knew I was done with it. Although having said that I did lapse on the odd occasion, but not everyday, full time use. If that makes sense? Heroin is a very easily lapsable drug when emotional shit goes down. But today I don't even consider it an option whatever is going on in my life. I've still got my recreational stuff, but again that's not a daily thing. More like nowadays I use a drug to enhance a pleasurable feeling, not smother or numb emotional pain.

Do you think that has something to do with it? You get to a stage in your life where you're more able to deal with trauma that occurs in your life than you were say, 20 years before? Hence the less you need to smother pain, emotional pain. Plus I've found that most traumatic experiences today don't even come close to what I'd consider trauma in my life, decades ago. I've usually already dealt with far worse than shit going down now. This today is a piece of piss, by comparison.

Babygirl. X

 

[Robi]

Thc,alcohol,fent,benzo,nothing makes me feel good but shrooms

 

[brokedownpalace10]

Do you think that has something to do with it? You get to a stage in your life where you're more able to deal with trauma that occurs in your life than you were say, 20 years before? Hence the less you need to smother pain, emotional pain. Plus I've found that most traumatic experiences today don't even come close to what I'd consider trauma in my life, decades ago. I've usually already dealt with far worse than shit going down now.

I think possibly that you get to a point where, getting high you are numbed to the pain but still think about it and focus on it, whereas if you don't get high and do something about it you actually feel better.

 

[Babygirl25]

That does make a lot of sense.

Babygirl. X

 

[jasperkent]

Do you think that has something to do with it?

I think possibly that you get to a point where, getting high you are numbed to the pain but still think about it and focus on it, whereas if you don't get high and do something about it you actually feel better.

For me, it was that it didn't work anymore.
I could not numb the pain, no matter how much I consumed. So my problems multiplied as I got more & more ill, both physically and mentally. There was no plus side anymore, not even for a few minutes a day.