Have I exchanged one addiction for another? Kratom for Subs?

[Cnjones]

Well this is my first post. I've been addicted to opiates the last 11 yrs & have been on suboxone, off & on, the last 3. Today makes day 15 w/o sub, although I am taking Kratom. It's from a local headshop so it's not potent, & I take a VERY SMALL amount- never exceeding 3 grams in one day. I was taking 3 and a half to 4 strips a day when I quit. I wanted to avoid taking Kratom altogether, but it was too hard. I've battled this demon way too many times & didn't have the strength to do it w/o a little assistance this go round. Anyway, I'm confused as well as terrified. I realize that everyone & every case is different, depending on dosage or whatnot, but I'm wondering if I'm taking enough Kratom to become addicted to it & scared of taking it for too long. Im not looking for any kind of high, just wanting to take Kratom long enough to get me through the worst of it, but at this point im having a hard time decifering what is still sub withdrawals or what might possibly now be Kratom. The fatigue & depression is immense. The last thing I want to do is exchange one addiction for another though. Any advice or suggestions are greatly appreciated. Good luck to all who are fighting the monster of addiction & God bless.

 

[belfort]

yep you pretty much have, kratom is weaker than other opiates but its stil in the family..im a former opiod addict and ive thought of going to kratom as well but its simply doing the same thing i was doing before, replacing a stronger opiate with a lesser one..u are still hitting same receptors and tolerance will go up and withdrawals will occur once u stop..

yes, the fatigue and depression from quitting opiods is agonizing and went on for months with me..i couldnt do it again tbh..

 

[belfort]

my advice is get off the kratom and start exercising, maybe go to meetings..i have no magical wand to wave, its a long battle my friend, i know..

 

[Cnjones]

Thank you for responding. Just having someone to talk to who gets it helps a lot. Today I took a third of the Kratom I usually take & it has been pure hell! I swear opiates are the devil! Such a love hate relationship. It's sick. I will no longer be taking Kratom. I'm a 29 yr old mother of 3 & want more than anything to get & stay clean for my kids. I want to know what it's like to be of sober mind, living life without a crutch as an adult. You say you don't think you could go through it again- does that mean you're back on them? Today makes day 17 & I feel like I've wasted all this time by taking the Kratom. That's a devastating blow but I figured I was just swapping one substance for another. I have went through this a few times and was successful but I honestly feel like I've about run out of fight. I did well the first week. I was still able to go to the gym every morning and handle life fairly well but within this past week I've honestly went nuts. Drinking & driving, which I know is retarded, & even sat on the ledge of a bridge thinking about jumping. I feel like an alien when I'm around ppl. I see everyone else enjoying their lives and it breaks my heart. I just want to be healthy & strong. For myself, my kids, for God. I just want a simple, drug free life. I'm
scared I'm about to give in though. Sorry for the whining & I realize I'm all over the place. It's the only way I know how to cope right now.

 

[crsmclaren]

I understand its tough, pretty much the first week is physical, the second is extremely mental and the third through fifth are the healing stages. I would give it 1month to start feeling better. When i was on oxy (alot daily) for a few years, I went CT and it was about two weeks until i was able to leave myhouse and walk around the mall, and about a month until I was able to return to work.

 

[Cnjones]

Yea I realize that its going to take time to heal. A person can't abuse drugs the way I have for so long w/o suffering for awhile. Although awhile feels like an eternity right now. I wish I could find something to help ease the RLS, but I've tried everything. None of the symptoms are pleasant, but that's one of the worst to me.