God save your daughters ; Wrote while I was in inpatient for my eating disorder..

[mini sari]

Could be a survivor
With a heart, Oh so strong
I'm making things better
that has been very wrong

I've won many battles
But the war, Still within
Will take much more power
In the end I will win

It's no longer my weight
I'm happy as I am
It's not about looks
It's not about some man

It's about an eviction
Of something that once felt so right
Something that seems so much stronger
Everytime that we fight

Like a child, I'm eating
Picking each tiny bite
Not able to hide
Too many people in site

I know what must be done
Not jsut for me, But all
Pick myself up
Each time I fall

So much love, I could offer
So much truth, I could give
So much beauty around me
So much reason, To live

Dear Lord, I'm not begging
For answers from you
I'm not saying you caused this
I'm not asking what should I do

Each challenege you've given, To me
As a lesson to learn
You've given me much
Since the day I was born

My prays are for this
That this heart, So strong
Can beat one more day
So someone can learn

My stroy, The truth,
My ending could be near
Because I believed he world
When their words were insecriere

To starve, To hurt, To cry, Feel pain
All the hurt that I've suffered
And so little I've gained

The truest beauty isn't in body
It rests deep inside
It's that special little sparkle
That shows through your eyes

To be thin, I'm now close
To tasting my death
Never knowing when my inhale
Will be my last breath

I know I can win this, Dear lord, I do try
I now rest on my knees and beg for you to hear my cry
Not one more girl, No more of this, To suffer in such a way
Dear lord, My only request, Please hear me today

---

Wrote in my final hours at childrens hospital medical center, I was discharged that afternoon after reaching my ideal weight of 108 pounds.

 

[E-girl]

good for you!

you should read I can be beautiful too by Sweet-e... it was always one of my favorites.... you might be able to relate.

 

[harraser]

^ says it all

 

[neverwas]

To starve, To hurt, To cry, Feel pain
All the hurt that I've suffered
And so little I've gained

with that few lines...you made me cry.

 

[cherub]

Eating disorders are never something you get over, but each day you can get stronger. keep your chin up.

Big Hugs

 

[Raz]

This is really beautiful...I've never been there in quite that way, but have hurt myself in the past to try and become some false ideal. These lines in particular I love...

So much love, I could offer
So much truth, I could give
So much beauty around me
So much reason, To live

The truest beauty isn't in body
It rests deep inside
It's that special little sparkle
That shows through your eyes

A lot of the time I think this kind of stuff comes off really cliche and shallow, but it's because it's generally standard hallmark stuff--this doesn't sound at all cliche because it sounds like it's coming from someone who really truly knows what a wonderful achievement it is to be able to realise these things are true.

This is really great work, thanks for sharing.