Getting rid of drug paraphernalia

[PortalFloyd]

It's been a long time since I've been here, but long story short I relapsed last summer and finally got my life together a few months ago. I have 104 days clean but I'm moving across town and have yet to get rid of my extensive collection of drug paraphernalia. I think that because I had works within reach this most definitely contributed to my last relapse. I'm very attached to my addiction and my past though so letting go is naturally really difficult for me due to past traumas. I really want to move forward and enjoy my clean sober life without this reservation and I want a fresh start in a new place that isn't plagued with memories of using. Hoping there's others here who have experienced similar situations and may have some advice to offer.

 

[ExInMil]

Well it seems that moving to a new place and getting rid of your works and what not seem to go hand and hand. Why take the old bad to the new good? Eh?

 

[herbavore]

I think that I would make some kind of ritual to it. Say goodbye to all the stuff in a very intentional way. You could begin by recognizing what you got from it when you used--because after all it was a response to some kind of pain and in the beginning it must have worked. Then move on to recognizing that it was pretty much an illusion that it "worked". How many hours did it work for and how many hours of misery followed? Then make a big deal out of letting it go--whether you destroy it or just trash it, make it count. I think it can be good to mark passages in our lives--whether it is an old relationship that was not healthy or a drug habit or whatever. Let the past be the past.

 

[ExInMil]

I think that I would make some kind of ritual to it. Say goodbye to all the stuff in a very intentional way. You could begin by recognizing what you got from it when you used--because after all it was a response to some kind of pain and in the beginning it must have worked. Then move on to recognizing that it was pretty much an illusion that it "worked". How many hours did it work for and how many hours of misery followed? Then make a big deal out of letting it go--whether you destroy it or just trash it, make it count. I think it can be good to mark passages in our lives--whether it is an old relationship that was not healthy or a drug habit or whatever. Let the past be the past.

Think the ending of Half-Baked, on the bridge, with the joint-chick talking to Chappel.... Not a bad idea.

 

[neversickanymore]

I think it can be really hard for some people to dump the stuff. i know a woman that has been clean off the pipe and needle for a decade.. she still keeps some old used bullshit in her room. I asked her why she did this.. she said what if I need it.. I said do you ever plan on useing again, she said no. I gave up trying to figure that out.

But I think this is what's going on.


When we get rid of the paraphernalia it puts a problem that will need to be solved by the problem solving part of our brain in between instant use, the addicted unconscious doesn't like that idea.. so it can throw emotions at us to try and prevent us from getting rid of the junk.. apprehension, fear, anxiety, sadness, etc.

Plow through and dispose of that stuff in a manor that's safe for everyone.

 

[LilbabiC]

When I finally accepted that I was clean and never going to use again I was able to get rid of my paraphernalia. I wrote a Dear John goodbye letter and placed it in a box with my paraphernalia (I made sure to break the needles off). Then I took the box and burried it in the woods. It was very liberating and exciting to start fresh.

 

[T. Calderone]

I like that idea, Lilibabi! I'm of the opinion that when a person is done with the drugs, they should dispose of paraphernalia that goes with it. I have a friend like nsa's who quit smoking crack back in the 90's. Got a sponsor, worked the steps and celebrated every year anniversary. She's moved house many times over the years and recently told me she's held on to her pipes all these years.

I asked her why and she explained that it was "just in case." I told her man get rid of that shit.

 

[neversickanymore]

right TC.. it does not make sense.. like any paraphernalia is in any real sense hard to obtain at any point.. its not, but it will require some planning and minor problem solving... which flips the advantage to the conscious mind.

 

[THECATINTHEHAT]

Getting rid of paraphenalia and numbers can be a good ritual but the problem is I know I can just walk in to the chemist and get more and find a link to some gear really easily (junkie radar, sure I don't have to explain that) if I want to. Getting rid of it is definitely a useful symbolic thing though. If you're prepared to get rid of it all and get rid of your numbers it shows a commitment to moving away from old patterns of behaviour.

 

[Jean-Paul]

it is more of a real step two of being done in areas when its harder to obtain works or drugs.

and yes...try to store them properly if you can...i always remember that scene from joe's apartment (bad mtv film) with the little kid playing with syringes in the park.

of course if you lead a life as grand as myself you might end up with a jackass of a friend who takes photographic evidence of your (opened) sharps container...for...what? storytelling time? guy was a fucking cunt. i don't even remember where i saw that photo, it's like a discombobulated memory due to being so shitty i didn't want to believe it.