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Fulcanelli's triumph

rollinboyo

Bluelighter
Joined
Mar 29, 2009
Messages
49
Location
New York City
tomorrow gravity failed
and all the doe-eyed children began to float
dancing to the sound of Brazilian guitars
and swallowing clouds like great scoops of ice cream

their prozac zombie mothers
bloated on Oprah and guilt are
stuck to their recliners like old gum
so numb they don't even notice the empty cribs

with surprise the enlightened scientists stare upwards
feeling like the wind has been knocked out of them
puzzled and ashamed they weep
in front of the large hadron collider

just then an electric surge
crackling and flashing like an exploding star
sweeps across the earth
and all of the mainframes crash

on Wall Street the bankers scream
stripped of their Brooks Brothers costumes
they run uptown in ugly nakedness
a greedy ravenous stampede

Nietzsche's horse chuckles in Union Square
tells the Goldman Sachs shills that he is God
bewildered they stop
then hungrily rip the beast apart

above the chaos Blake in brazen glory rises
riding his chariot sunward with the children in tow
all shouting boisterously with tummys heaving
“whither Voltaire, Rousseau?”

on the tired green of Harvard University
where the atheists fuck in angry orgy
a student sighs and the clock stops
the pen of every professor runs dry

while down a dim corridor 'round musty tomes
in the forgotten library of Alexandria
Fulcanelli in his alchemists robe
transmutes the Principia Mathematica into gold
 
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Fascinating analysis...the clueless youth unknowing of the hell outside their reality.
 
very interesting indeed. nice technique of weaving all of the different historical figures and concepts together. I can't say I understand Sam's comment though..that's not really the same message I took from the poem....
 
"nice technique of weaving all of the different historical figures and concepts together."
i agree thats what i liked the most too.

what do you mean "critique"??

okay...it was fucking terrible.
lol jk but seriously.

it is very well written. nice build up and theme - direct prophecy of the end times (present times?). but there is too much apparent personal opinion/prediction mixed in, for example the anger at people who sit around watching oprah. i like poetry thats more "international" flavoured personally. but a fuckload, if not most/all, people would disagre with me.

otherwise my best advice is not to cram too much personal logic/theories/opinions/whatever, think of it as one message (..or two...maaaaaybe three;)) and stretch that out using your aesthetic ability. dont preach in poetry (remember you know NOTHING). i mean you can of course, but i hate it when poets do that, classics or modern nobodies ! ;)tl me art is meant to be more of a mystery that hints'teaches you truths...not directl saying those truths...thats why i stopped liking the band Tool. they eventually just started stating their message/attitude blatantly
 
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