fucking hell.....

[Lysis]

Yeah you can't do that in the US either. US is geared towards the mothers too. It's better to do it the proper way, because if you do anything rash, it can be used against you.

 

[eireann]

Yeah you can't do that in the US either. US is geared towards the mothers too. It's better to do it the proper way, because if you do anything rash, it can be used against you.

yeah i also dont want to be taking my child away from his mother either,over the last week it has actually worked out well for me,i dont think its likely that i would get two nights a week off a judge as my sons so young so i can live with the situation for now.

the little fat head was way too loving though i hated having to give him back haha,i had him two nights this week and just today the ex rang me to take him sat night too.as shes going out so that will be 3 days out of seven...booya

 

[Gizmo101]

wow thanks for the long post gizmo,i have guardianship i went to court in kilkenny for it,the judge gave me one hour on a sat and sun,the law in ireland is geared totally towards the mother,but i have him two nights a week due to me begging my ex for it!!!!,people in ireland are homeless everywhere we have on of the highest homeless rates per-capita in europe,i dont qualify for emergency rent allowance we are in ireland in 2012 dude,any funds available to the welfare officer are allocated to single mothers or families etc,i was told to stay with my family and giving the number of a hostel as for work i have cv's posted all around kildare,there just isnt any work available. for example a new tesco just opened in kildare town and every one working there have 3rd level educations and they are packing selves,ya need to wake up to the new ireland gizmo the celtic tiger is over. i was working up until last year so i didnt realize how bad its got,but its a disaster,thanks for the post i wish it was that black and white.....im happy though i just had my son and we had a ball.......cant to wait to get him again next week

ps...i argued in on the social thread because people were condoning a mother for buying herself good heroin...thats why i stay away from that thread now the whole heroin issue infuriates me as a former addict i was hoping i would see people posting on the dangers of drug abuse...not celebrating it...

serious question gizmo how long did it take you to get used to not living with your kids and are your kids happy with the situation?

Yes eireann this is 2012 + that is exactly why rent allowance does not take 3 months to come through - the social welfare know that no landlord in the world is going to wait 3 months to get their rent - so they dont leave people waiting that long - there would be public out rage if that was the case - if people had to wait 3 mths for rent allowance then no one would ever get as far as getting rent allowance because they would get evicted before it ever came through - if something doesnt make sense then it is generally not true - Have you applied for your rent all yet? - because if you have already applied then they would have explained to you that it doesnt take 3 months to come through - my mate works in threshold - have you heard of it? it helps people with housing problems like yours - i will ask her about rent all in killkenny + i will let you know what she says - my daughter is 25 - she lost her job 4 months ago - she was sharing a house with her mates but she wasnt getting along with them so she moved out + got her own flat - a week later she lost her job - so she signed on - she also applied for rent allowance on the thursday - by the following friday (8 days later) her rent allowance came through - she was able to pay her rent - once you apply for it straight away you wont be kept waiting

it good to hear that you have guardianship of your son - you see you do have rights! - how did you get it through so quickly? - the courts normally wait till a couple is broken up for at least 3 months before they hear their case because many couples brake up + then get back together again - so the courts normally give the couple 3 months breathing space - the courts call this the cooling off period - but its good that you have that sorted

the mother doesnt seem to be stopping you from seeing your son - so that is a good thing - it sound like once you dont give her hassle then she wont give you hassle - im sure she just wants wats best for the lad - it takes a while to get over a break up like tat - judging by ur post yous only broke up about 4 weeks ago so its still early days - getting over it all depends on how you feel - if your still in love with ur ex then it will be harder to get over - but you have to let your head rule you not your heart - its hard but trust me it will get easier in time

i saw your posts arguing with every one on the heroin thread - that is what i meant by you been arrogant - wat businesses is it of yours is it if a mother wants to use heroin? - tats like someone calling you a bad father because you dont have a job to support your son - anyway you were on a thread made for people to discuss wat types of b was been sold in their area + you come on telling a woman tat she is a bad mother + telling every one that they are doomed + they should stop using b - tat thread wasn't the place for that - you came across as childish + arrogant - and it wasnt just the mother tat you had a go at - you had a go at nearly every one on tat thread- although it did seem strange tat you had a go at a woman for been a bad mother - there are loads of men on that thread including me that use heroin + yet you never told us that we were bad fathers - you came across as a misogynist - that is why i mentioned it to you - you got to take a step back + respect you sons ma + let her lead her own life now - if you threat her with respect then she wont make life difficult for you - i know tat this is probably hard to hear + im not trying to give you a hard time - but you should take any advice that is going - you dont want to carry on fighting + hating your ex for years to come - dont be so quick to judge people - im sure your not perfect your self

just give your self time + you will feel better - it takes time but it does get easier - the mother is letting you see your son so things seem to be already going smoothly - you just need to step up to the mark now + get a job + give the mother proper help supporting your boy - its seems that she is doing her bit so you should do yours - there is a rescission on but there are jobs out there if you really want one - you mite have to do something that you hate - but for the sake of your son you should do it - being a parent isnt all about going to the park + hanging out together - its about growing up + being responsible - be a good role model for your kid - show your son that its good to have a job - as kids get older they get more + more expensive - its all money money money - school - college the lot - you should see some of the crap jobs that i worked at over the years - plenty of times i held down two jobs at a time so i could provide a good life for my kids - their mothers were great at doing the mother things so i always made sure to be good at doing the father things - also a job keeps you busy - its better then sitting around the house thinking about all that has gone wrong - you need to wake up + stop making excuses for not having a job - a year is a long time to be out of work - you havent worked since you son has been born - maybe that is a reason why your sons mother is pissed off with you? - maybe if you get a job she will have more respect for you - dont be such a defeatist - stop saying i cant find a job - there are no jobs - there are always jobs if you look

yous only split up a few weeks ago so its normal to feel very sad now - but you will start to feel happy again - at least your getting to see your son - give it time + you will feel happy again - you strike me as very young with the way you talk? - so you still have the rest of your life ahead of you - years of happiness ahead of you - time does heal - you wont always feel this down - look after yourself mate

 

[eireann]

thanks for the advice gizmo i didnt no you had kids before you posted on this thread,i hope you can give up the heroin for them.

 

[eireann]

shes after pulling the two night stay overs as she says she misses him....now i have to go back to court...bitch!!!!
i have to miss him all week the selfish..fuck!!!!

 

[Busty St Clare]

Fuck that, tell her to cut the fucking cord. I know you have it rough with the Itish legal system but I would still try and fight for 50:50 and compromise form there.

I am lucky that I have reasonable relationship with my kids mother. I officially have 50:50 but reality is with school and other things, plus the fact they live 100km away I usually have them weekends and school holidays. We are negotiating the oldest high school at present and hopefully she will come and live with me full time then as I pay the school fees and the best schools happen to be where I live. My ex also tries to pull the "I'll miss them" shit but I won't have a bar of it.

My advice is fight hard but never dirty. Always have a smile on your face when in front of the kids and let lawyers take care of the nasty shit. Best of luck, its not easy.

 

[eireann]

Fuck that, tell her to cut the fucking cord. I know you have it rough with the Itish legal system but I would still try and fight for 50:50 and compromise form there.

I am lucky that I have reasonable relationship with my kids mother. I officially have 50:50 but reality is with school and other things, plus the fact they live 100km away I usually have them weekends and school holidays. We are negotiating the oldest high school at present and hopefully she will come and live with me full time then as I pay the school fees and the best schools happen to be where I live. My ex also tries to pull the "I'll miss them" shit but I won't have a bar of it.

My advice is fight hard but never dirty. Always have a smile on your face when in front of the kids and let lawyers take care of the nasty shit. Best of luck, its not easy.

great advice,that is what i am going to do,im in the court tuesday to book the case in,im sick of this,i cant believe i ever loved her what kind of person behaves like this the selfish fuck,she has him all week,i wouldnt mind if i was a dead-beat dad she would be the the one taken me to court,she should be able to put our child first she is robbing me and my family our rites,he needs his dad and the rest of his family.