Mona, I like both of your big posts. To the first one, I say, "I can relate". It's been happening to me for over a decade and I'm not sure why. I think it might be something at the "soul level" actually. Like, we were put on this earth to help other people out of their misery.
To the second post, I say "YAY!!!" I really like your attitude. Keep it up, no matter what happens.
Oh, and I agree ... "Fuck" is unbecoming. And it actually makes you sound angrier than I think you are. I think you intend to put forth a conquering attitude, but it feels kinda angry with all the "fuck"s in there.
PLHS,
TimeTwister