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Friend shot emself.. not feelin too great.

V

VandiLLisM

Bluelighter
Joined
Feb 1, 2011
Messages
74
I ran away a year ago and met my friend ishmael who everyone called smoke. He was the funniest most thug mother fucker in this city. He was big as hell, didnt take shit from anybody, had a baby on the way and hustled to make his money due to a felony drug charge messing up his chances for a job. He also went to school. He was doing his best to make something of himself coming from a crazy family and lifestyle. He never turned his back on me or took advantage of my abundance of weed. We hung out everyday for a long time, and then didnt see each other for a while then just in these recent months we started hangin out again. Well last night he got into a fight with his girlfriend who called the cops on him. He is felony probation with weapons and drugs in his house and in a drunken rage shot himself.. He is in ICU on lifesupport right now and odds are greatly against him to survive and even if he does, he is facing life in prison. Im high on meth right now trying to mask these feelings, and I am simply looking for a little support. Im still in shock really.. Im hoping to be able to see him and his girlfriend tomorrow. Not sure why I typed this, mostly just to vent. Any responses are appreciated.. Ill be on all night.. Thank you
 
I completely understand where you're coming from. A close friend of mine (and occasional BLer phenyl1) took his life last friday. Haven't had the fortitude to start an "in memoriam" thread for him yet. Sorry for the unnecessary info, I'm drunk as fuck, in mourning, and needing to get this off my chest

Wish you and your friend all the best
 
Thanks so much man feel free to pm me if you want to share any stories or just talk and help support each other.. I know I would appreciate it. Keep your head up man its what he wouldve wanted and thats the best way to honor him. Thats whats keeping me semi up at least.. stay strong brother the world is a shitty place we gotta do what we can to benefit it. Iv never been spiritual but I cant help but pray and hope that Ill see him again one day. I shouldn say that yet tho, because I cant give up hope! he can still pull thru it and wel be able to laugh about it one day even if its through some glass on a phone..
 
Sorry to hear that Vandill :( Meeting someone you can genuinely trust and can connect with, can sometimes be a rare-occurence in this world. Really hope he gets through this, fingers crossed for all of you who care about him. <3

Also my heartfelt condolences Egor :(, look after yourself. <3
 
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I can't imagine what it must be like to be on the other side of a suicide attempt and in egor's position, successful one.

Like what was said before me, these are heavy issues, but it's important to take care of yourself, no one else will. And keep the memories. I believe that's the only way to remain connected with those who have passed, or those who are apart from us.

I am truly sorry for your losses and wish you strength.
 
I'm sorry to read this this morning dude. :( I hope things turn up not only for your friend but for yourself. It sounds like you're in a tough spot. Be safe, be smart.
 
I hope everything turns out alright for him and that he's able to pull through. Just do what you can to support him - visit him in the hospital, and if he recovers and all, do what you can to support him then, too. You, your friend, and everyone who cares about him are in my thoughts and prayers. I'm really hoping he'll be okay - it sounds like he was trying to get everything back on track, and I don't want that effort to be wasted for him. :(

Also, Egor, my deepest condolences to you for your lost friend. I don't know the circumstances of it all, but things were obviously overwhelming if he took his own life. Just know that he is at peace with those things now.
 
Ohhh man, I know that feeling man. 3 of my uncles and my grandpa died waiting in a bed. It's hard waiting, and waiting, and waiting. If I could give any advice right now, its to go see him. I never got to see anyone of my uncles or my grandpa for the last time since they all lived in mexico. Go be there for him. And be there for yourself as well. Even if he's not awake. Go.

Edit: I just want to say, that Im praying for your friend. My other uncle is in the hospital right now. He's a priest and I havent prayed in years. But he asked me to, so I did. Im saying that its gods work or anything. But he's been getting better. Maybe its placebo or something, I dont know. I can't even say that it helped at all, maybe he would have gotten better on his own. I dont know how religious you are, but If i were you, I would pray for him.
 
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VandiLLism I am so sorry to hear this. I can imagine it is a huge shock for you. Have you got any friends or family who you can talk to about all of this? I think if you can keep talking to someone about your feelings you will cope better. The next few months will be hard but can be made slightly easier if you have a lot of support. And of course there are always a lot of people right here on Bluelight to talk to if you ever need to. Kipo also made a good suggestion above, if you can, go and see your friend in hospital. Take care man <3


egor I am also sorry to hear about phenyl1's passing. It is always heartbreaking when someone takes their own life, and it's so hard for the loved ones left behind. How are you coping?? <3
 
Yeah thanks everybody sorry I havent been on in a few days. He was taken off life support at noon on friday officially. Unfortunately the family didnt want me in there when he was taken off, which I didnt take personally. His pregnant girlfriend wasnt allowed in either. I kicked it with em for the whole day that it had happened so im happy about that at least. I just wish I called em up that night to see whats up. gotta be positive I guess, though im not sure how much good that does anyway. Also to whoever had asked, it was his ex girlfriend that had called on him not his current pregnant one. Im sure the fight was over money or something. She lives across the street and he used to come over when they were fighting.
 
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