Recently all I can think about is suicide...i have no plans to kill myself, but the thoughts are forever present..I feel like I have a thousand thoughts in my head, not a one is good, and I just want it to stop..I know i should be on medication, but I have no insurance.I'd become a pill zombie, if I could. I'm miserable in my life, I have no friends and a boyfriend who is practically out the door..if i did do it, with him gone, it would be one less thing to hold me back..i know i should be thankful for what i have because people do i have it worse, but that doesn't help me in the slightest..i look for some kind of relief but it never comes, only gets worse..I have recently been experiencing panic attacks as well, although no one knows about it, no one would care if they did...my life is forever spiraling out of control and i have no way to stop it.
no one cares what happens to me, and if they do, and i took my life, they would move on from it.
I hear how selfish suicide is all the time, i personally don't feel this way..living with chronic pain and having no escape from it, well some people just don't understand it..when there is no one to talk to to get these feelings out, just make it so they keep building up..I have urges to cut, but i haven't..anything to escape..God im lonely..I wish there was an escape! when will it end, if ever? FML!
no one cares what happens to me, and if they do, and i took my life, they would move on from it.
I hear how selfish suicide is all the time, i personally don't feel this way..living with chronic pain and having no escape from it, well some people just don't understand it..when there is no one to talk to to get these feelings out, just make it so they keep building up..I have urges to cut, but i haven't..anything to escape..God im lonely..I wish there was an escape! when will it end, if ever? FML!
