Finding Feelings

I've never used a Blog before, which your prolly gonna be able to tell in oh a sec.
I've had more free time on my hands lately and I've been rereading the things I've written. More so the old journals and It's bringing up feeling I really don't want to think about. Since coming into the program I'm in I've been having to look at myself and be honest to everyone I come in contact with and myself. It sucks.

*I've come so far to feel so lost* Before my addiction the night used to calm me* I'd sit outside for hours listening, watching the sky and just being okay with myself* Why am I lost when I've gained so much* "just for today", right?* But deep inside I need to know* Will there be a happy tomorrow* Or am I simply hurting everyone around me* This book says we were insane, so what now* I still feel insane* I'm scared to feel anything for someone* I'll either hurt them, they'll hurt mw or in the end I'll still lose them* I can deal with nothing lasts forever* I already pasted that test* I didn't do so well, I always sucked at tests* Emotional ones - the wrost*

 

Welcome to Blogs, honey.
Sometimes when you realize that you haven't been honest with yourself it can be like a ton of bricks landing right on your face It can be hard but once you ARE honest with yourself, and learn to grow from the experience, you will feel alot stronger.
I look forward to reading more from you here in Blogs- as well as in TDS

 

Thanks, the hardest part on being honest is the having to back up and say, "um yeah about that". Fixing the lie right aways is best but hard as hell.