RxVeritas
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Jun 14, 2023
- Messages
- 175
Hello, friends.
I've been lurking hard and long for fifteen plus years. I'm a man in my mid 30's, and although I've dealt with generalized anxiety disorder and OCD tendencies (mostly dermatillomania) throughout my entire life. I wasn't diagnosed until the age of 20 and let me tell you; the first time I took a benzo I had the immediate realization that not everybody is scared shitless most of the time. I was prescribed clonazepam 6mg/day, but probably averaged more like 3mg or 4mg/day, and this went on for about 5 years. I stopped taking it, and all my other psychiatric medications because I wanted to reevaluate my baseline. The withdrawals were insanely bad for 3 months, still sucked for 3 more months, and I had PAWS for over a year.
Fast foward ten years.
I just recently got a prescription for alprazolam ER 1mg after finding an actual MD psychiatrist, which in itself was a task, but he's a nice old dude, who seems understanding and is willing to work with my on medications. He started me on xanax ER because he said it "lasts all day", but also said we can try clonazepam if I don't like it, so I'm very optimistic. I get very little effect from the Xanax ER 1mg, but just the fact that I know he is willing to work with me and I'm pretty good at talking to doctors at this point. I also take duloxetine 60mg, mirtazapine 15mg, and gabapentin 2400mg daily, and occassionaly 50-100mg hydroxyzine for sleep. I also use phenibut, 2-3g, a few times a week in order to use less (or none, but rarely) xanax those days. My history of recreational drug history is extensive and has included periods of dependency on meth, kratom, and suboxone (at different times), and although I now have medical, I've been using cannabis fairly consistantly for the past 15 years for anxiety and chronic lower back pain that I've developed. That's not an all encompassing history of my substance use, but it gives an idea to anybody who's curious.
I haven't used social media, in any form, since probably 2008. I realized early on how detrimental it was to my mental health, and made the decision to simply read and research various topics because I figured that would be a much better use of my time, and I think I was invariably right.
This website has been the most amazing resource for me throughout the years. Today while I was lurking, something inside of me said, "You should really just make an account, you've been there everyday for the past decade plus" so I listened to voice, and here I am.
I just wanted to thank you all for the wealth of knowledge I've gleamed from bluelight up to this point, and I look foward to engaging with you all!
I've been lurking hard and long for fifteen plus years. I'm a man in my mid 30's, and although I've dealt with generalized anxiety disorder and OCD tendencies (mostly dermatillomania) throughout my entire life. I wasn't diagnosed until the age of 20 and let me tell you; the first time I took a benzo I had the immediate realization that not everybody is scared shitless most of the time. I was prescribed clonazepam 6mg/day, but probably averaged more like 3mg or 4mg/day, and this went on for about 5 years. I stopped taking it, and all my other psychiatric medications because I wanted to reevaluate my baseline. The withdrawals were insanely bad for 3 months, still sucked for 3 more months, and I had PAWS for over a year.
Fast foward ten years.
I just recently got a prescription for alprazolam ER 1mg after finding an actual MD psychiatrist, which in itself was a task, but he's a nice old dude, who seems understanding and is willing to work with my on medications. He started me on xanax ER because he said it "lasts all day", but also said we can try clonazepam if I don't like it, so I'm very optimistic. I get very little effect from the Xanax ER 1mg, but just the fact that I know he is willing to work with me and I'm pretty good at talking to doctors at this point. I also take duloxetine 60mg, mirtazapine 15mg, and gabapentin 2400mg daily, and occassionaly 50-100mg hydroxyzine for sleep. I also use phenibut, 2-3g, a few times a week in order to use less (or none, but rarely) xanax those days. My history of recreational drug history is extensive and has included periods of dependency on meth, kratom, and suboxone (at different times), and although I now have medical, I've been using cannabis fairly consistantly for the past 15 years for anxiety and chronic lower back pain that I've developed. That's not an all encompassing history of my substance use, but it gives an idea to anybody who's curious.
I haven't used social media, in any form, since probably 2008. I realized early on how detrimental it was to my mental health, and made the decision to simply read and research various topics because I figured that would be a much better use of my time, and I think I was invariably right.
This website has been the most amazing resource for me throughout the years. Today while I was lurking, something inside of me said, "You should really just make an account, you've been there everyday for the past decade plus" so I listened to voice, and here I am.
I just wanted to thank you all for the wealth of knowledge I've gleamed from bluelight up to this point, and I look foward to engaging with you all!
