rollmodel36
Ex-Bluelighter
FILM: Cursed: I want my money and my 90 minutes back. Dammit!*POSSIBLE "SPOILERS"
Just saw it earlier today. Damn. Where to begin? A fortune teller in the beginning says that she sees blood in a couple of character's futures. Lot and lots of blood. Well,that was before this film was butchered and given a PG-13 rating. No blood,lot's of cutaways. The first part of this movie reminded me of Spider-Man. Just what you'd expect from a supposed horror movie about werewolves,right? The lead guy(played by Jesse Eisenberg)starts off so mousy and seemingly spooked by his own shadow,I think Peter Parker would even pick on his ass. After being "cursed",and you will hear it put like that about 20 times,his strength and senses are hightened to the point where he becomes a super high school wrestling champ. He also becomes more sexually appealing to others. One guy included. That scene plays as funny as it sounds. Meanwhile,Christinia Ricci gets the sexually appealing power and........the power to bend bathroom stall doors. She really got the short end of the curse.
This movie is basically Scream,with werewolves. Just replace the ghostface killer with a werewolf,Henry Winkler(the Fonz) with Scott Baio(the Fonz's nephew) and interesting characters with,well,these people,and this is what you're left with. The whole mystery is who is the original werewolf. It's obvious within the first 15 minutes. They throw in a few wild herrings,but trust me when I say that the person you think it is,that's the mother-fucker. Oh yeah. There is another and when that person is revealed to be the murderer,it's just plain stupid. There's a scene involving someone giving the bird that made the similar scene in Constantine look Oscar worth.
The film itself was almost complete two years ago,when they decided to reshoot 90% of it. Goddamn,does it show. And the special effects? Not so damn special. When I saw the creature for the first time(a man in a suit,obviously) all I could think was,"You've got to be fucking kidding me!" I've seen creatures on a Sci-Fi Channel original make this fuck look like a fake head on the end of a stick. The transforming effects were even worse. The special effects in The Lawnmower man make these look outdated.
So,in summary,fuck you Kevin Williamson! Fuck you,Wes Craven! Damn it man! You made A Nightmare on Elm Street and The Last House on The Left for fuck's sake. What happened? When a movie goes so wrong that you have to reshoot 90% of it,cut your loses and go spend the reshoot money on lots of drugs. They can only help you two come up with something,dare I say,watchable. If this movie was a man,I would beat it's fucking ass! Yeah you,Cursed! I'm calling you out,bitch! Let's go! Oh yea. And a big Fuck You to Pacey! Yes, David Schwimmer will always be know as Ross and you will always be Pacey. Sucks to be you,fool. Bright side. I was high as hell when isaw it. Darkside. Completely killed my buzz.
Just saw it earlier today. Damn. Where to begin? A fortune teller in the beginning says that she sees blood in a couple of character's futures. Lot and lots of blood. Well,that was before this film was butchered and given a PG-13 rating. No blood,lot's of cutaways. The first part of this movie reminded me of Spider-Man. Just what you'd expect from a supposed horror movie about werewolves,right? The lead guy(played by Jesse Eisenberg)starts off so mousy and seemingly spooked by his own shadow,I think Peter Parker would even pick on his ass. After being "cursed",and you will hear it put like that about 20 times,his strength and senses are hightened to the point where he becomes a super high school wrestling champ. He also becomes more sexually appealing to others. One guy included. That scene plays as funny as it sounds. Meanwhile,Christinia Ricci gets the sexually appealing power and........the power to bend bathroom stall doors. She really got the short end of the curse.
This movie is basically Scream,with werewolves. Just replace the ghostface killer with a werewolf,Henry Winkler(the Fonz) with Scott Baio(the Fonz's nephew) and interesting characters with,well,these people,and this is what you're left with. The whole mystery is who is the original werewolf. It's obvious within the first 15 minutes. They throw in a few wild herrings,but trust me when I say that the person you think it is,that's the mother-fucker. Oh yeah. There is another and when that person is revealed to be the murderer,it's just plain stupid. There's a scene involving someone giving the bird that made the similar scene in Constantine look Oscar worth.
The film itself was almost complete two years ago,when they decided to reshoot 90% of it. Goddamn,does it show. And the special effects? Not so damn special. When I saw the creature for the first time(a man in a suit,obviously) all I could think was,"You've got to be fucking kidding me!" I've seen creatures on a Sci-Fi Channel original make this fuck look like a fake head on the end of a stick. The transforming effects were even worse. The special effects in The Lawnmower man make these look outdated.
So,in summary,fuck you Kevin Williamson! Fuck you,Wes Craven! Damn it man! You made A Nightmare on Elm Street and The Last House on The Left for fuck's sake. What happened? When a movie goes so wrong that you have to reshoot 90% of it,cut your loses and go spend the reshoot money on lots of drugs. They can only help you two come up with something,dare I say,watchable. If this movie was a man,I would beat it's fucking ass! Yeah you,Cursed! I'm calling you out,bitch! Let's go! Oh yea. And a big Fuck You to Pacey! Yes, David Schwimmer will always be know as Ross and you will always be Pacey. Sucks to be you,fool. Bright side. I was high as hell when isaw it. Darkside. Completely killed my buzz.
