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Festivus in Jail

Bardeaux

Bardeaux

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SANTA ANA, Calif. — A Festivus for the rest of us? A convicted drug dealer in California thinks so. He cited his adherence to the holiday celebrated on a famous episode of "Seinfeld" to get better meals at the Orange County jail.

The Orange County Register reported Monday that Malcolm Alarmo King disliked the salami meals served at the jail, so he used his devotion to Festivus as a reason to get kosher meals reserved for inmates with religious needs.

Keeping kosher is not one of the tenets of Festivus, which was depicted on "Seinfeld" as celebrated with the airing of grievances and the display of an aluminum pole.

Sheriff's spokesman Ryan Burris says King got salami-free meals for two months before the county got the order thrown out in court
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http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/12/14/festivus-in-jail-inmate-g_n_796292.html
 
That is a very old trick in the US. Seeing as how Orange County has a large Jewish population I am suprised that he was able to get over. Usually, as in New York City, they have a permanent system in place and the food is atrocius. I actually had relatives begging administration at Rikers Island to stop feeding me kosher because every day for months both lunch and dinner were the same soybean meatloaf. I am sure that it is merely negligence but it really seemed like a form of torture. What is worse is, it isn't an option. As you are booked- in my case at the Tombs in Manhattan- they non-chalantly ask you your religion without explaining why. Answering Jewish gets you a special identification card (blue with orange stripes vs orange for non-Jews). Then, at Rikers, you are automatically served kosher.
 
the trick is this=allergies. when booked into jail you tell the nurse you are allergic to tomatoes(most everything in jail is tomatoe based)that way you get the alternative meals which are better for sure(in the counties i have been) they just have less meals on rotation, like 3 diff meals instead of 6. and you can allwys find someone to trade with so if you get sick of it you can trade up. oh and i learned not to tell them i am in w/d in the counties that dont provide methadone(only one in my state does and you have to already be on it) because they will involuntarily put you on a liquid diet which is fucked.
 
stivsmegg said:
the trick is this=allergies. when booked into jail you tell the nurse you are allergic to tomatoes(most everything in jail is tomatoe based)that way you get the alternative meals which are better for sure(in the counties i have been) they just have less meals on rotation, like 3 diff meals instead of 6. and you can allwys find someone to trade with so if you get sick of it you can trade up. oh and i learned not to tell them i am in w/d in the counties that dont provide methadone(only one in my state does and you have to already be on it) because they will involuntarily put you on a liquid diet which is fucked.
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damn I forgot all about the liquid diet lol. Clevelands jail used to bus everyone that was in for misdemeanors and others not at escape risk down to the clinic in the morning for methadone daily. they stopped doing it for some reason that I forgot :/ probably the "nicest" thing I've heard of a jail doing. here in st clair county they'll give you narcotic pain killers if you are on a script for it. a guy came in with a major fucked up hand and was getting 10mg vics 3-4 times a day. he was trading 1-2 a day for trays from the junkies who were dopesick.
 
that reminds me, I have to take care of an active warrant($100 cash bail)not a real big deal but i didnt do 30 days of sentence to service (community service)so i have to pay the bail to get a new court date and hopefully they will understand i was strung out then and i have been clean the longest i have ever been(only methadone and pot, but they wont know about the pot) for over a year and hopefully give me the chance to do it again instead of some workhouse time(probably weekends and i could take my doses)which would suck but not so bad with my dose cuz every other time there i was sick. jail sucks. cops fuckin' suck. prohibition is bullshit.
 
stivsmegg said:
that reminds me, I have to take care of an active warrant($100 cash bail)not a real big deal but i didnt do 30 days of sentence to service (community service)so i have to pay the bail to get a new court date and hopefully they will understand i was strung out then and i have been clean the longest i have ever been(only methadone and pot, but they wont know about the pot) for over a year and hopefully give me the chance to do it again instead of some workhouse time(probably weekends and i could take my doses)which would suck but not so bad with my dose cuz every other time there i was sick. jail sucks. cops fuckin' suck. prohibition is bullshit.
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you said "workhouse" and getting your 'done while locked up. you don't happen to be from the st Louis area do you? (our city jail is the work house and they give methadone to a select few people)
 
no, minneapolis. i think that is pretty common, the whole workhouse thing. i live in the "twin city" area which is minneapolis and st.paul(capitol). minneapolis(hennipen county) is the only county that gives you methadone but they only give you a 3 day detox(used to be 10)makes me wonder why they even bother(oh yeah, lawsuits). but the workhouse here is an old federal prison they use for people doing up to 3 years (back to back as you can technically only do a year and a day in the workhouse, a day more and you have to go to prison)so if i go it will be an out of custody thing and i can do their week end thing where you book yerself in every fri night until sun night(probably have to do 5 weekends)and since i get lots of take home bottles it wont be a problem cuz i can bring my meds(i.e.methadone). although if you turn yourself in at the county jail they will call your clinic and you get the 3 dy detox even if you have a months worth with you.
 
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