The warmer weather and oncoming summer months have me both excited and ambivalent. I'm ambivalent because lately I've been reading and listening to a variety of feminist literature and discourse. A common thread running throughout is that of the "heterosexual male gaze." From what I understand this means the way our patriarchal, male dominated systems encourage objectification and sexualization of the feminine form in unrealistic, distorted and unfair ways. In relation to magazines, advertising, and other media sources, this makes perfect sense to me. However, there also seems to be an implicit suggestion that heterosexual males simply looking at females is reason enough to accuse them of sexual objectification - or safely assume they are looking at them through "dominating," objectifying eyes.
My ambivalence centers mainly around going to the beach. If I'm at the beach and I see a woman wearing a bikini and I find them attractive, how does looking at them automatically mean I'm being sexually objectifying? There's a loud feminist voice which might say, you are doing the wrong thing; she didn't visit the beach today to be ogled by the "heterosexual male gaze-" but I find this position confusing. In one sense it's expecting males who find females attractive by nature and instinct to repress and deny the fact they find women attractive. Secondly, there appears to be a very clear double standard. Many times I've been at the beach with female friends, even my sister, and heard them swoon out loud about the six pack on this guy and the shoulder muscles on this other one. This suggests that sexually objectifying people you're sexually attracted to is completely normal and needn't be meticulously "kept-in-check" by some method of though-policing.
What I want to ask feminists is this. What do you suggest I do when I go to the beach this summer, and I see a woman in a bathing suit who I find myself sexually attracted to? Immediately avert my gaze in fear of potentially objectifying her? Stare at my feet? Look only at men so I don't get sexually stimulated? Stay at home? I'm feeling lost here. Perhaps someone could clear this up for me. No years previous to this have I ever sat at a beach and thought perhaps I was re-enforcing the patriarchal, dominating power imbalances feminists speak of simply for having a pair of eyes and working genitals.
My ambivalence centers mainly around going to the beach. If I'm at the beach and I see a woman wearing a bikini and I find them attractive, how does looking at them automatically mean I'm being sexually objectifying? There's a loud feminist voice which might say, you are doing the wrong thing; she didn't visit the beach today to be ogled by the "heterosexual male gaze-" but I find this position confusing. In one sense it's expecting males who find females attractive by nature and instinct to repress and deny the fact they find women attractive. Secondly, there appears to be a very clear double standard. Many times I've been at the beach with female friends, even my sister, and heard them swoon out loud about the six pack on this guy and the shoulder muscles on this other one. This suggests that sexually objectifying people you're sexually attracted to is completely normal and needn't be meticulously "kept-in-check" by some method of though-policing.
What I want to ask feminists is this. What do you suggest I do when I go to the beach this summer, and I see a woman in a bathing suit who I find myself sexually attracted to? Immediately avert my gaze in fear of potentially objectifying her? Stare at my feet? Look only at men so I don't get sexually stimulated? Stay at home? I'm feeling lost here. Perhaps someone could clear this up for me. No years previous to this have I ever sat at a beach and thought perhaps I was re-enforcing the patriarchal, dominating power imbalances feminists speak of simply for having a pair of eyes and working genitals.