skuby dew
Bluelighter
I thought to myself today and had been for awhile until I came up w/ the guts to write this down.
I have always been a person who's always been up for tons of fun. But just awhile or few days ago it hit me really hard! People always seem to come off as a friend to me, but truly they aren't nor were they. Yeah I go hang out w/ them I do things w/ them but there not a friend.
I also realized that a friend is someone who doesn't take you to get cracked out just b/c they wanted to see you cracked out, a friend is someone who's gonna be like let's do it again!
But the wierd thing is it's when you ask to hang w/ them again it's like they come up w/ all these dam excues that you wish they wouldn't and just be straight forward w/ you, and be like hey I'm doing stuff w/ so and so. Don't make up bullshit reasons.I'm one person that always ask you to be straight forth w/ me.
The reason for this believing and thinking is b/c I don't have that many ppl I can trust. This has been a thing that has always happen to me. Why I don't know. I have very high self esteem for myself but when it comes to friends I have no one to really turn to.
I wish that I had a friend that I could be like hey guess what blah blah blah happen to me today. But it's not like that, it's more like the ppl who I hang w/ now I'm scared shitless to tell them hey guys I do E, b/c they'd be like your so cool now b/c you roll. yeah skuby good one. But for the ones I go raving w/ it's like you can tell when they give you a fake vibe like they care when you know they don't.
It piss me off when you try to give your heart or let someone into you heart. It hurts me more when they act like your one of there coolest friends, when they know deep down that your not. Why fake shit? I at one point in time use to never have a gulity lil voice in my head telling me that things were wrong, but now I do and in some ways I wished it leave but I think now it makes me feel more alive!
So as I try to end this w/ being happy
I say I'm the one you always kick 'em when there up and kick 'em when there down thanks for making me feel like shit!
skuby dew
------------------
~*~Be true to yourself & you shall never fall.*AdRock!
~*~Big Ups VA/md/dc ~ I see yeah babies ShAkEn ThAt AsS
*skuby dew & groove armada
~*~Everything u want isn't everything u need Vertical Horizon
[This message has been edited by skuby dew (edited 28 April 2000).]
I have always been a person who's always been up for tons of fun. But just awhile or few days ago it hit me really hard! People always seem to come off as a friend to me, but truly they aren't nor were they. Yeah I go hang out w/ them I do things w/ them but there not a friend.
I also realized that a friend is someone who doesn't take you to get cracked out just b/c they wanted to see you cracked out, a friend is someone who's gonna be like let's do it again!

The reason for this believing and thinking is b/c I don't have that many ppl I can trust. This has been a thing that has always happen to me. Why I don't know. I have very high self esteem for myself but when it comes to friends I have no one to really turn to.
I wish that I had a friend that I could be like hey guess what blah blah blah happen to me today. But it's not like that, it's more like the ppl who I hang w/ now I'm scared shitless to tell them hey guys I do E, b/c they'd be like your so cool now b/c you roll. yeah skuby good one. But for the ones I go raving w/ it's like you can tell when they give you a fake vibe like they care when you know they don't.
It piss me off when you try to give your heart or let someone into you heart. It hurts me more when they act like your one of there coolest friends, when they know deep down that your not. Why fake shit? I at one point in time use to never have a gulity lil voice in my head telling me that things were wrong, but now I do and in some ways I wished it leave but I think now it makes me feel more alive!
So as I try to end this w/ being happy

skuby dew
------------------
~*~Be true to yourself & you shall never fall.*AdRock!
~*~Big Ups VA/md/dc ~ I see yeah babies ShAkEn ThAt AsS

~*~Everything u want isn't everything u need Vertical Horizon
[This message has been edited by skuby dew (edited 28 April 2000).]