Man before I get into that topic, I am happy to say that I have a serious interview for a serious business job in about 9 hours. This will mark the six month or so I've been unemployed as hell, and goddammit this job is coming not a minute too soon. I have about enough money for another month and then I would really have to declare bankruptcy (like really, as in I should have declared it last May. I checked out my tax return, which cost like a billion dollars to prepare because of all the options trades, and my total capital losses were much more than I expected. I thought it was only 25,000 but it was actually 35,000. Bad news bears. Good news is that I'm not going to pay a lot of taxes for 09 unless I get really good at my job really fast. I really just need like 20k in the bank to feel secure after what I've been through. I was on the verge of committing suicide every day with a real live shotgun for a while there, and I just recently started talking to my friends again after a four month period of being basically catatonic and worthless, and they're being really cool and understand that I was super depressed and all of that good stuff.
Anyways, I didn't know what to do with myself for a while there so I started working toward completing the hours necessary to become a CPA and was recruited by the IRS for some really great job but I just couldn't do it. It was an expensive lesson but I figured out that I may not be too stupid to be an accountant, but I really just don't give a flying shit about the subject, and if there is something interesting then I'll get my accountant to tell me about it when it comes up. It's great they can feed all of that information into the information chain. Without them man I guess the world would fall apart, and I have a lot of respect for them and can speak their language but the subject has a habit of turning my brain completely catatonic. I hate fucking around with SQL, I hate fucking around with building any sort of database. I just want to use the damn things, not buy them wedding rings and have kids with them. To each his/her own I guess.
So I continued along the path this semester, and I didn't go to class, failed more than anyone has failed before because I didn't even open the books, and didn't even try to drop the classes after scoring 20% on all my tests just by eenie meenie minie moeing my exams, and didn't even bother showing up to the final or justifying any of it to the professors or even to myself. Fuck accounting, end of story. Lessons cost money, and I still have transcripts that show I can be good at it but no one will ever see this semesters grades. If they ask I'll just tell them the truth - fuck accounting, fire me. Why would I get another masters just to kill time. That is so pussy, and I just couldn't do it. All it would do is overqualify me for every entry level position in the world, and once the economy swings back I'll be hanging around a bunch of people at work that I would like to see impaled on a really long query or smashed by a giant box of audit data that for some reason wasn't imaged. But I really like them. I always got along with accountants, science guys, architects, and otherwise obsessive and happy people the best.
Lawyers are great to do coke with, but their family lives are seriously fucked. There's this one in Houston who has made all kinds of case law and is captain awesome according to Saudi Royals (who dual wield planes into the twin towers) and newspapers around the world but godammit he has seven kids and has had 5 wives. He is always sweating like he could never figure out the mixture of cocaine and liquor that is not destined to make his heart stop one day. I like him just fine, but Jesus Christ it's like he needs to visit the make-up room every time he goes anywhere. I just hope he doesn't go and die on me because he's full of useful beans and I've got at least one finger one of his pies.
I can't really judge. No one takes more pills than me, true story. I switched up the order of consumption one day and went to a taqueria afterward. For about an hour after that I seriously thought I was having a heart attack. All I ate was a milanesa torta and a chicharron taco, for christ sake. I look great on the outside, but there is definitely something wrong on the inside just like that lawyer who I will probably never really know, as in really, really know. Some people keep it locked up their whole lives, but the proof is in the pudding since you have to interact with other people. He spreads a large amount of professional and political win, but it doesn't take a microscope to see that he's miserable as fuck and his family probably is too.'
Longest post ever, brought to you by the guy who is going to put on a suit tomorrow and walk into an office and literally have a gameplan that involves nothing more than playing politics until I max out my money and secretly get people ahead of me fired or demoted like the company is a video game. And yeah it's just a first interview but it's the same chick that interviewed me before a year ago when I turned the job down. We'll most certainly end up having sex in her office, as is evidenced by the fact that I accepted her job offer a year ago and didn't show up to my first day at work because I hedged my bets and actually started working for another company that same day. And she still calls me lol, the day after I run into her, for an interview. I'm staying up all night tonight and I'm going to be James Bond wasted during the interview and still get the job. Jesus it will be nice to have some money again.
Anyways, I didn't know what to do with myself for a while there so I started working toward completing the hours necessary to become a CPA and was recruited by the IRS for some really great job but I just couldn't do it. It was an expensive lesson but I figured out that I may not be too stupid to be an accountant, but I really just don't give a flying shit about the subject, and if there is something interesting then I'll get my accountant to tell me about it when it comes up. It's great they can feed all of that information into the information chain. Without them man I guess the world would fall apart, and I have a lot of respect for them and can speak their language but the subject has a habit of turning my brain completely catatonic. I hate fucking around with SQL, I hate fucking around with building any sort of database. I just want to use the damn things, not buy them wedding rings and have kids with them. To each his/her own I guess.
So I continued along the path this semester, and I didn't go to class, failed more than anyone has failed before because I didn't even open the books, and didn't even try to drop the classes after scoring 20% on all my tests just by eenie meenie minie moeing my exams, and didn't even bother showing up to the final or justifying any of it to the professors or even to myself. Fuck accounting, end of story. Lessons cost money, and I still have transcripts that show I can be good at it but no one will ever see this semesters grades. If they ask I'll just tell them the truth - fuck accounting, fire me. Why would I get another masters just to kill time. That is so pussy, and I just couldn't do it. All it would do is overqualify me for every entry level position in the world, and once the economy swings back I'll be hanging around a bunch of people at work that I would like to see impaled on a really long query or smashed by a giant box of audit data that for some reason wasn't imaged. But I really like them. I always got along with accountants, science guys, architects, and otherwise obsessive and happy people the best.
Lawyers are great to do coke with, but their family lives are seriously fucked. There's this one in Houston who has made all kinds of case law and is captain awesome according to Saudi Royals (who dual wield planes into the twin towers) and newspapers around the world but godammit he has seven kids and has had 5 wives. He is always sweating like he could never figure out the mixture of cocaine and liquor that is not destined to make his heart stop one day. I like him just fine, but Jesus Christ it's like he needs to visit the make-up room every time he goes anywhere. I just hope he doesn't go and die on me because he's full of useful beans and I've got at least one finger one of his pies.
I can't really judge. No one takes more pills than me, true story. I switched up the order of consumption one day and went to a taqueria afterward. For about an hour after that I seriously thought I was having a heart attack. All I ate was a milanesa torta and a chicharron taco, for christ sake. I look great on the outside, but there is definitely something wrong on the inside just like that lawyer who I will probably never really know, as in really, really know. Some people keep it locked up their whole lives, but the proof is in the pudding since you have to interact with other people. He spreads a large amount of professional and political win, but it doesn't take a microscope to see that he's miserable as fuck and his family probably is too.'
Longest post ever, brought to you by the guy who is going to put on a suit tomorrow and walk into an office and literally have a gameplan that involves nothing more than playing politics until I max out my money and secretly get people ahead of me fired or demoted like the company is a video game. And yeah it's just a first interview but it's the same chick that interviewed me before a year ago when I turned the job down. We'll most certainly end up having sex in her office, as is evidenced by the fact that I accepted her job offer a year ago and didn't show up to my first day at work because I hedged my bets and actually started working for another company that same day. And she still calls me lol, the day after I run into her, for an interview. I'm staying up all night tonight and I'm going to be James Bond wasted during the interview and still get the job. Jesus it will be nice to have some money again.
