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Faced with the possible loss of a father?

Dante- I understand your struggle to come to terms with this, but I think that your relationship with your father will be elevated from here on in, which is a very positive thing.

*much empathy*
 
Dante
everyone has pretty much said everything that could possibly make you feel better, but all i can say is tell your dad that you love him every single day, even if you dont say it do things with him to show him you love him. 8 years is a long time, but if he only lives for the next 8 years at least you can look back on it and remember it with no regrets for somethintg you didnt say or do....
 
that sucks dante :/

but, as others have said, eight years *is* still a long time, so just make sure you make the most of it. remember any of us could die at *any* time, really, so always make the most of the time you get to spend with him. i can't really think of anything else to say, i guess i'm no help, but my thoughts are with you (and same to you, haste).
 
at the very least you get a chance to make sure everything's in order between you and your father. i'm sure you'll put extra effort into your relationship now that it seems like it's got a time-limit, even if eight years is quite a long time. that extra effort is a good thing, and it will ease the sadness when the inevitable eventually happens. it's a sad fact that most of us will have to see our parents die. the real tragedy is when it's the other way around.

in a way you're lucky to have advance notice. not all of us have been so lucky. this sort of thing is a reminder that death is always around us, and we can lose loved ones at any time. that's why it's so important to let people know how you feel about them, because you might not get a second chance.

also i think there are no right or wrong emotions to be feeling. just be careful not to let your frustrations impact negatively on your life. there's no point in tearing yourself up over something you have no control over.

good luck.
DQ.
 
Dante,

Although we've already replied to the thread, we just wanted to check in to see how you were. S (Mr Samadhi) dad's funeral was yesterday, but it's still not really sunk in yet.

Much love to you and your loved ones. Cherish the time you have with him, definitely make the most of it. We only had a shortish time to prepare (December 02-March 03) but he was at our wedding 2 weeks ago (we moved it forward), and that means THE WORLD to us...

S & K
 
Big hugs.

I lost my father when I was 15, it was a very quick illness, so I did not have to face the watching and waiting that you may. But it was a huge shock, and it took all of our family a long time to come to terms with it.

There is no easy way to deal with something like this.

If you want to talk about anything I am available.
 
I'm going OK now, I've been so busy with school work and actual work that I haven't had much spare time to think about it, which is good. It's somewhat settled in, and I always now notice myself making that extra effort for my Dad, which is going to turn me into somewhat of an anti-social person over the next little while.

mr & mrs samadhi: danke very much for your concern, I hope the two of you can cope with this painful time as well. I'm sure I don't know quite the amount of sadness you must both be feeling, and I sincerely hope over the weeks and months to come that you can come to terms with your loss.

B
 
All i can really say is NEVER GIVE UP HOPE!! I was told my mum had very little chance of living (there was very slim statistics mentioned). It was touch and go for a while, but im am glad to say she is fully recovered and happily getting on with her life now (i live with her and can hear her laughter as i type).
No matter what anyone tells u, anything is possible...

ABout the mood swings, I shudder at the thought of what i was like, but good friends will see you thru (they were wonders for me). Never hesitate to call a friend and never fear them misunderstanding your moods, they know what your going thru and are there for you.
^^^ especially when you are feeling depressed!!!

Best of wishes

J
 
well, rather than post a whole new thread and fish for sympathy, i think i'll just hide my thoughts in here...

i found out last night my dad has been rushed onto the emergency list for heart surgery.... which wouldnt be so bad if he hadnt had open heart surgery last year to replace a valve in his heart.. which nearly killed him..

its sad, not only because i am faced with the loss of my father (again) but it reminds me of my own mortality.... my granddad died from the same thing... and my dad is facing this, but 20 years earlier than my grandfather... and dad has been having heart problems since 30... so i guess i'm worried about myself too... which is maybe a little selfish i dunno...

but yeah, super scared and worried at the moment and just needed to get something out....

thanks for taking the time to read....

:( :( :( :( :(
 
I'm sorry to hear that bro :(

I'll be wishing the Muzby family good luck
 
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to muzby.

this is so sad to hear dude...hopefully your dad's condition improves.

i'm sending good thoughts your way
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Muzby,
I am hoping and praying that your dad's operation will go well and that he will recover. My thoughts will be with you and your family. I hope that people who love you will give you comfort and strength to help you through.
 
Ahhh dammit Will. I'm sure he'll be fine. If he's anything like you he'll hang around to spite the government and get a pension till he's 112. <3

Thinking of you though.
 
Different, but... I haven't had any contact with my dad since I was 12 years old (almost 10 years now). To me he is dead, and I will never have anything to do with him again. About the same time, my real father figure was diagnosed with cancer. I felt like you feel now, and I know it's not a nice feeling. Trust me, there is no point thinking so far into the future. In the years from now that you get to share with him, you will have many good times that will mean a lot to both of you. You should take each day as it comes, enjoy life with your father, and do your best to make sure he is happy, and also keep him on track with his diet and treatment. Best wishes, enjoy life.
 
Dante and Haste..........any updates guys? I hope things are going well for your families and yourselves.........Im sure there have been many many positives.


Muzby........ Im sorry to hear that mate and my thoughts are with you.........Drop me an pm if you want to chat although I get the impression you have a magic circle of mates around you down there.

Of course its OK to be thinking about yourself........actually its a sign of your exteme honesty with yourself and others that you can admit that.

Maybe it would be a smart thing for you to go and get some check ups and then continue doing so on a regular basis.

But Im sure a bright lad like yourself would have already realised that and the fact that fore warned is fore armed.

Keep smiling champion.

Maz.
 
My mum had Cancer which is now in remission. She went though Chemotheraphy and the doctors told her she would never have children. The Chemo had destroyed her oravries and womb. A year later I was born. I guess I always think about that and appreciate my life. I think about what my mum went though and how she may have never had me.

I am so sorry for people who loose their parents before their time. I think about how close I got to loosing both my parents at various time of my life.

Hugs and stay strong I guess is all I can say.
 
Muzby so sorry to hear this, I know how you feel dude - hang in there and hope things improve... best wishes to you and your family :)


MazDan said:
Dante and Haste..........any updates guys? I hope things are going well for your families and yourselves.........Im sure there have been many many positives.
Click to expand...

Dad's condition is slowly worsening and its like a time bomb waiting to go off - its a grim reminder of how deadly smoking is :(
 
Haste...........My own Dad is getting on now and while its not something I dwell on, Im aware that the innings may well be declared at any time.

I have just spent a weekend with him, took him four wheel driving........which scared crap out of him.......lol...........and spoke with him at length about how much I want him to write down the story of his life.

Now my Dad is not a big writer but I was very pleased with the reaction...........It was almost as if he had been waiting to be asked.

I sort of impressed on him that i really wanted to know stuff like who his friends were and what sort of trouble he got himself into and what sort of things he did etc etc etc.

Maybe you could be doing the same.
 
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