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evoking enough emotion to kill five cows.

supersonic

Bluelighter
Joined
Nov 2, 1999
Messages
270
Location
Lovely Michigan
Comes to this
As is always it comes to this, more damage between a momentary bliss. I start so fresh
so new, I end so tired, so weak. It’s always the same, create build higher, higher collapse
start again. When will I stand back and ask the question what is being accomplished here
where will anything get me? To live and feel how awful goodness is, to start so one can
end. And everyday at the end of it all it comes to this. Life it seems is built so one can
suffer for their bliss. To bite hundreds to attain a kiss. To try again and again but miss.
Sometimes it just feels useless to do anything whatsoever at all and doing nothing is
almost just as bad. Everything begins to smear. If only, if only one could make sense of
the game again like they did before. But when you change you can’t do the things you
did when you were who you were before. Faith then dwindles what are you left with? A
hole that cannot be filled, not by love, not by drugs, not by TV, not by sex, not by
anything. Everyone has a hole, everyone needs their fix. And I’m beginning to make
myself sick. They have a name for people like me a title to be classified and dissected
by, apathetic they say, because they have beliefs they have a rage and we are just cold
lifeless forms that care not for our surroundings. Oh and they think that change really
means something. And that’s the reason for my inertness, because every person thinks
they’ll have a dramatic effect, but do stones that fall in the water, though they create
waves, change the chemistry of the liquid? Do buildings that fall stay down, because
none bigger and higher take their place? But keep fighting they say, the spiral we march
in has to end somewhere. Silly silly a spiral is nothing but a cleverly hidden circle, and
have known that it was a circle then we’d stop for fear of never getting anywhere. But
spirals confuse pretend the landscape changes, but in the deep soil the composition is the
same. Imputent idealistic we try to fight processes that have lasted forever, because we
are based upon reason, and reasoning creatures can think their way out of it. But we’re
fools hiding behind reason when instinct runs like a disease in wars, in material
dominance, in spiritual power struggles, even in practices of reason we find one another
squabbling like animals screaming for the loudest philosophy to be right. Who cares? no
one will ever be content with one answer so why list the possibilities? In the end its
about power, whoever has the control. And one wonders if those who have it are even
happy. So when I lay my head down and let my mind go away and I don’t care, don’t for
one second tell me how fucking easy it is to be this way because every night I have to
accept the fact that it all comes down to this.
 
you know whats weird is that I'm happy, everyone seems to think that what I write is unhappy, and depressing, I think its uplifting oh well.
 
Describes life exactly. Hey, you got people to notice your work. It was amazing. Loved every single word of it.
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TREE-LIFE
 
aaaaww i feel like this sometimes bout a certain relationship i have aaaah wat ta do eh??
u write well darl keep up the good work
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i thought it was you i needed nevertheless i have learnt thru the pain i needed me
 
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