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Ever wish you never tried it

W

WAY2CREZY4U

Bluelighter
Joined
Jul 10, 2004
Messages
58
Location
Florida
I feel as if I'll never be myself again. Meth is one thing I'll never recommend getting into. Since Ive tried it .. feeling depressed alot. Im kewl and feeling good on it. But when i start to get sober and think im just like what the hell am i doing with my life. I work and what most would consider goal oriented living life to its fullest. But Im a fake .. I have to make myself smile and carry on conversations. When all i want to do is be alone . I've got 2 sets of friends that dont know each other from jack shit. Non user and user ... Sometimes its like I live 2 different lives.

Just ranting im all geeked and alone with my mind going 90 to nothing ...


some drugs are worse then others and meth/ice is bad



blah blah
 
I wish I never tried heroin, or maybe I wish I never shooted it.

Thank GOD Im no longer involved in that scene. In my personal opinion Heroin is a one way street and 99% of it is very dark.

shals! :D
 
I always wonder what would have ended up happening these past 3 years if i hadn't started anything. If i never would have smoked bud, done adderall, done coke, smoked ice, DXM, etc... I just wonder what i would have ended up doing instead of drugs. Lately, all my allowance has been going towards my habits. I don't really have a problem with that, seeing as alot of my friends do the same thing, and cuz im doing what i want with my money. But sometimes, i just get sick of all the lying im doing to people. Im lying to some of my best friends, people ive known since i was wee tall... only 1 of my friends smokes ice... hes the only person that i can smoke ice with and the only person that i can tell. I told one of my other friends that i smoked ice once... and he flipped out. He got really mad and told me if i did it again that hed be really pissed off and shit... so i cant tell him what im doin... and thats my best friend... i cant even tell him what im doing.

Just makes me sick of all this lying... i dont like to lie. And i have to lie about everything i do to one person or another.

I mean, of course i enjoy doing what i do, but then it comes to the point where i think about everything, and it hits me. I dont know about yall, but sometimes i wish i had never started any of this. Sometimes, i just wonder what everything would have been like if i would have gone down the other path.

Well im done with my tweaked rambling.

Those are my views.

Later.




... i think this is the reason why i dont visit the dark side much... kinda scary...
 
after i do pretty much any drug in high dosage i think about my life and all the things i dont like about it. it makes me wish i could never stop doing drugs. when im fucked up on something, i am perfectly happy. but when im not, i am never happy. i dont understand what this life is for. spend so much time working to be able to live in comfort that most of life just sorta passes by. the only thing in life that i feel matters is personal relationships. friends, family, significant other. drugs help me escape the fact that i have very few personal relationships.. small family(most of them not around where i live), few friends(not even a handful(most of them are busy with work or thier girlfriends alot), and no significant other(probably the biggest reason i am unhappy). i dont like my current job, but i dont totally hate it. i just dont like it cause its a job. i am unsure of what i want to do in life, as far as career goes. i wish i knew what would change how i feel about life, and i wish i knew how to go about accomplishing it. working and doing drugs when im not is not making me happy, its just giving me something to do in the meantime because i dont know how to get happy. i have always been a very shy person(im 22, last girlfriend i had was in 10th grade), but the drugs have made me a lot less shy. im rambling..

to answer the question, i sometimes i wish i never tried any drug. i sometimes wish i never experienced how you can feel when doing them. but also i know, that without doing drugs, i would never be happy(at least temporarily from the effects of a drug), i would be bored alot, i would still be so shy that i literally cannot talk to a person that i dont already know. i dont think i would have done anything better as far as career goes without having done drugs. i am not as emotionally stable as i would be had i not done drugs(this isnt only a bad thing... i am more thoughtful of other peoples feelings than i used to be). however before using drugs i had never had a single(serious) thought of suicide. after drugs, i have.
 
Meth is definately a drug i wish i had never tried, I did 2 years ago, and i'm still doing it to this day.
 
Cocaine for me. It seems to know everything personal about me and knows just how to make me feel perfect. It scares me because I hear it echoing from the ghetto reminding me about all of my emotional scars and it promises to fix them.

I need it to be fixed.

It's really hard to resist but I'm being stubborn about keeping a tight schedule with it. I only use it once a month! :)

but if I never tried it before, I never wouldve had to worry about a dumb schedule! I wouldn't have to worry about breaking the strict schedule and feeling bad.

Some things are better left undiscovered.

~Pixie
 
throwitallaway said:
Why do you all wish you never tried cocaine?
Click to expand...
cuz i can never say no to the shit. i like it alot while im high, but i fucking hate the comedown. this stuff is everywhere i go. cocaine is probably the number one abused drug around where i live, well weed to, but im talking about narcotics.
 
I wish I had never done ex. I wouldn't know how wonderful it is and it would be easier to say no to it when it's rears it's ugly head! Will power! :( Easier said than done, but I'm doing well...2 years going strong!
 
I still crave heroin every once in a while. This is almost a year after I dropped it cold. I didn't even do it that long, and only snorted it. :\ scares the pss out of me.
 
Why do I wish I never tried coke? Well because I have no willpower in turning it down.. like uumpaloompa said. I go to college at Southern Illinois University which is a HUGE party school, and they have these "afterhours" parties that me and my 2 best friends go to every weekend. The afterhours parties are the kind of parties that I actually *like*, I mean they play trance, they roll on MDMA... etc

The only problem is coke is always everywhere at afterhours. And once I see it... I have to do it.
 
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