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ever lost a best friend?

matt<3ketamine

matt<3ketamine

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Apr 15, 2010
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have any of you's felt like you's have lost ur best friend?
i have and its killing me inside, i dont think he knows i even feel this way.
i tend to spend nights not really being able to sleep properly jus thinking over at how he has just left my life, im not gay, dont get me wrong but its just i have taken so many drugs with this guy, every drug we took, we made the decision together at wether to take it or not, have had some of the most amazing times of my life with this guy, he is just a class guy and now he just isnt there for me now, he hasnt got the time for me now it seems, he has gotten into a relationship and seems to be taking it seriously which is great but he has left me behind as a mate, i become quite skizophrenic when thinking about the situation, first being like 'hes one of my best mates, i should give him a text and see whats up' then the next second im thinking 'fuck him, he has ditched me, he doesnt care what so ever'
im just a little fucked up at the minute, every drug i now take doesnt seem to be as fun or enjoyable, i also keep reminising on the good times and then remembering i cant get them back then becoming slightly depressed about the whole thing.
has anyone any advise that could help me?
 
get some other friends.

man up... it could be worse, he could be dead.
 
i have other friends, its just this guy was such a mate to me, think if ur best mate decided to stop chilling with u, u would b pretty upset by it, its just the mates i have at the minute havnt shared some of the experiences me n him have, its just annoying me lately
 
i had a best friend die more than 3 years ago. i still cry pretty often over that, especially for pretty much the entire month he died.

not too long ago, i kinda went through what you're going through with another best friend. i cant even remember how long it took me to recover, but we're talking again now, so it kinda doesnt even matter.

just do your best to hang in there. try to find things you can do to occupy your mind (movies, books, video games, etc) so that you dont dwell on the situation, until enough time passes that it doesnt hurt so much. hopefully he'll come around, but you cant count on it.
 
I sorta know how you feel...I was very very close to someone, and she kept taking me for granted. She felt like anything nice I did for her, she deserved, and never did anything nice for me. Since we usually got stoned together, and I had been the one with the weed for about a week already, I ran out and figured she would pack the bowl. She got pissed off, and said, "just because you share your drugs with me doesn't mean I wanna share mine with you." That was several years ago, should have known something was up at that point.

I'm very glad the person is out of my life actually, but at first it felt sorta strange. I don't have many friends that I hang out with very frequently, and now even a year later, spend a lot of time by myself. I've had more than one close male friend get a girlfriend who felt "threatened" by me, even if the guy and I had been friends for years and it was as super platonic. So since they are whipped by the new girlfriend, they would stop talking to me to not piss them off. Othertimes, they just started spending ALL of their time with the significant other, and even if I called in tears with an absolute emergency situation, they would not cancel plans/change their agenda to spend any time with me. I've been shit on a lot, to the point that I'm very wary of who I give my time to, since on too many occasions I have also been ditched or forgotten about.

matt, you aren't alone...the only advice I can give you is, find something else to do. I'd just wait until the friend comes around...if he really cares about you, he'll probably remember you exist when they have a fight or break up, unfortunately...because right now he most likely wants to spend all his time with the girl, and there's not really anything you can do to fix that.
 
I would say talk to him.
The worst thing that could happen is he confirms your fears and he doesn't care anymore....yeah, it would suck but if he is your best friend and you don't try, you will always wonder. And for myself, it is better to know the truth and be hurt. AND maybe he will tell you he felt YOU were ditching him, who knows!! So, try talking to him in a non confrontational way.......
Hope it works out for you!!
 
i have been in the same situation as you only my best friend and i are both female. i also have laid awake on numerous occasions wondering wtf has gone wrong, we used to be so close.

truth be told you and your friend may be drifting apart and you have every right to feel a little pissed off about this but how do you know he is not feeling the same way and you are both just stubborn? i took the stand and sent a text to my friend saying hi how are you doing and she replied instantly. when we took drugs together the next time we discussed all these feelings and it turned out she was in the same boat.

trust me, your best friend will never forget about you. he may not wanna spend everyday with you cos he has other friends and commitments but believe me, if you get the confidence to text him and ask him to hook up my guess is he will make the time for you.
by the sounds of things he is very lucky to have a friend as caring as you. it's hard to find trustworthy honest caring friends these days as too many people are out for themselves. good luck
 
cheers guys, thanks for the advice, he seem to miss the good old days too, got talkin to him today, got good plans made for this weekend so should be good, cheers guys once again, i dedicate my next bong to u's all :)
 
the same EXACT thing just happened to me. I made a dumbass mistake and ended the friendship which resulted in tears and suicide attempts and drugs and all sorts of things. When i tried to tell him i was sorry and i still love him and he shot me down, told me that must suck for me. Dont make my mistake, just hang in there, telll him how you feel.
 
^ broken, no person is ever worth taking your life over. You're only 14...unfortunately I can promise you with reasonable certainty that it'll happen again at some point. Plus, if they don't care about you, what does that prove if you kill yourself? Nothing, and death is FINAL. Please just come here next time, and please don't try to hurt or kill yourself. I've found some solace in even just reading through other TDS posts, realizing that other people were just as miserable as I am or more, and they were alive with no intentions of being otherwise. Tears and non-lethal abuse of drugs are alright...the latter, I would be a hypocrite if I said otherwise.


I'm a little jealous of those of you with a best friend...I do not have a best friend, I have no one that would have my back no matter what, and it's lead to a very lonely, depressed existence.
 
to the op > glad you and your friend sorted it out. usually if you feel that strongly about a friend there is a gut instinct that you have a friendship no one can touch so it's always worth taking a step even when you may feel like your being took for a mug. unfortunately people do drift apart but i'm sure if this friend is as good a friend as you sound to him then you have nothing to worry about. me and my friend only see each other once every couple of months nowadays and we prefer it like that, it makes it more special when we do have a wreck sesh together.
peace =0)
 
I hardly speak to my best friend anymore, especially since we both moved out of our apartment. His friends (also friends of mine) still like going out to bars, but I can't do it because drinking effects my mood big time, I can often have bad depression after one night of drinking. I do miss him, but I just can't keep up with his lifestyle.
 
^^ That's actually damn funny, I know this is a more serious thread but nothing wrong with a little humor (or not humor, I know the feeling).

I've never really had best friend, maybe some short term (3-5 years) close friends. It's probably my own fault, I don't make the effort to get that close to people, I'm not really comfortable with it. Who knows what will happen in the future though, might meet someone that could be a good friend, until then it's lone wolf style I suppose.

So I've never lost a best friend, but I've never had one:\ , so I guess I had no reason to post:)
 
i've lost a best friend. even now, i dont know how i am going to make it through this life.
 
Just talk to him tell him how you feel and see if he can make any time for you and if he dosent then forget about him someone elsecwill come along man
 
yes, i lost my best friend on 1/19 to what was most likely an OD. i still have a hard time with it. she was 1 of those "one of a kind" people. we actually met on this site in '09.
 
like a lot of others said, he could be dead. my best friend hung himself in a tree in his back yard, 5 years ago. it's a pain that will never go away. did i read you're only 14? trust me, you are going to meet so many more people throughout your life that will come and go, it's something you'll learn to accept.
 
Sort of. When I left to go to boarding school, I left my best friend in Jersey. Then when I graduated from highschool, I left another best friend for college. And now I'm in college and I may have lost another one, because I couldn't keep my dick in my pants. It's kind of funny, because I'm a VERY shy guy and not a 'player' or anything at all, and the one time I do some stupid cliche macho move like that, it winds up hurting someone close to me more than I imagined it would. I hope it's not the end forever. Best friends are hard to come by. My condolences.
 
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