The drugs: Two pink elephants
The duration: Approximately 12 hours
***
The kids were picked up Saturday afternoon. It had been raining all weekend which meant there were no qualms with attacking the house in a cleaning frenzy. Bathroom, floors, bedding was all cleaned and sparkling. I packed the back pack with the usual supplies; picnic blanket, 2 charged iPods, valium, lip gloss, mini speakers, water bottle, and watermelon lollies. We were in bed by 9 o’clock whispering excitedly about what tomorrow might hold.
6am:
I woke up and trimmed and painted my nails – a nod to my special lady. I tried a dark blue but decided on silver - I didn’t need the added head fuck of everyone looking at a guy obviously wearing nail polish no matter how crazy it made her. I whipped up some breakfast of avocado and haloumi on toast and we settled on the couch together to relax.
Breakfast was a sight to behold. A brand new culinary invention that set a positive tone for the morning ahead. We wanted something sustaining yet not too heavy – this was the perfect solution.
After eating I started gathering the things I would need. Lip-gloss, water, etc. My stomach was in knots I was so nervous and I was visiting the ladies room every 5 minutes.
9am:
More fucking rain, it was like fucking Noah was next door building his ark.
As I cut our 2 Pink elephants in half and wrapped them foil we debated the plan to head into the city. For 15minutes we consigned ourselves to staying home and scaring the neighbours for the rest of the day.
I was watching the sky with trepidation. I didn’t really fancy being stuck in the city flitting from one busy public building to the next trying to avoid frequent downpours for the whole day. I didn’t know how my body or mind was going to react to these goodies, and I certainly didn’t want to jeopardise my chances of enjoying myself.
I looked him in the eye and he read my fears. He smiled and told me we could stay home if I wanted. I let out a sigh of relief and sat back down on the couch acutely aware of my coarsely knotted stomach.
9.15am:
Fucking brilliant sunshine! I pushed for the city. She was hesitant and insisted on packing the umbrella. Suddenly I had become a pack mule.
We locked the house and started to stroll down the road to the ferry, each chewing on our half an elephant. I had secreted the other two halves deep in my pack with the horrible thought creeping into my head that these tabs that were discovered by a chance meeting at a pub the week before my be nothing but old xmas cards..
We settled on the ferry and slowly slipped up river towards the city, watching the mansions from a distance and listening to the benign jabber of Mr and Mrs Joe slob around us.
We walked the short distance to the ferry in blazing sunshine holding hands. He was practically skipping from excitement while I was trying my best not to vomit the contents of my jumbled stomach onto the pavement.
I chewed my small piece of cardboard and shoved it around my tongue with my mouth. I announced loudly once I managed to swallow it and resigned myself to my fate.
Whatever happened I was just going to have to deal with it.
We entered the ferry quickly and I immersed myself in silent thoughts and observations. The middle-aged group sitting ahead of us were talking of murders and rapes around Adelaide compared to Brisbane. I tried to ignore them thinking that was the worst way to herald the beginning of a trip. I struggled to make conversation as we passed the many waterfront Mc Mansions until we finally reached our stop.
10am
As we approached Southbank I looked across and raised an eye brow. It was met with a “Meh”. A little floaty, a little ripple patterning beginning in ernest but no real effects. We stepped off the ferry and wandered through the gardens. A sudden boom from a busker blowing his didgeridoo caused a brief giggle. We waded pass countless Asian tourists and discussed taking the other half. Maybe “5, 10 minute” became the catch phrase of the day.
I could tell what he was thinking before he even looked at me and raised his eyebrow questioningly. I wasn’t feeling anything. Elevated heart-rate and a slight sense of anticipation, yes, but hell I can get that from pure excitement. It seemed to me that things just weren’t working.
My limited experience in psychedelics meant I had no idea how long these things take to really get going. He certainly didn’t look pleased, so I imagined it was nearing the supposed regular time of ‘lift-off’.
We decided we would take the safe option and wait ‘Fi, ten minute’ to see if things improved. I was cynical but also desperately scared that he was too eager and expectant. Drugs have a way of kicking your arse if you lose any kind of respect for them.
10.30am
We approached the Nick Cave exhibition only to find that it was closed Sundays! As we sat on a bench and checked our watch nothing seemed to be working. The floaty feeling of earlier has subsided and we decided what we needed was the other half.
Chewing and walking we squeezed into a glass elevator with a family of 4. The short ride up became a battle of wills between my mind and my laughter. We finally reached the art gallery and strolled through a few rooms. A couple of landscapes started to shimmer and a few of the marble busts began to follow me with their eyes. We decided to trek across to the Modern Gallery to see its latest exhibition.
We crossed through the “Whale mall” attached to the museum, a large concrete cavern with life size blue whales strung from the ceiling. High pitched whale calls were piped through speakers that seemed to echo for ever as we left them in the distance. I was finding it more difficult to walk; steep stairs down to the next promenade suddenly took on Everest proportions. I briefly stopped to give two old tourists directions, struggling to sound human.
His voice turned to a hush as he said the words. “I think we need to have the other half..” We stopped and I looked into his eyes. I sighed deeply and nodded.
The sense of excitement was still lurking but nothing else was even remotely affecting me. The contact we had used was literally a stranger in a pub – it would not have been far fetched to think they might be bunk.
I took a deep breath as he reached into the backpack and handed me another slice of cardboard. I munched it down hoping against hope that it did something. Little did I know my prayers were to be answered in a matter of minutes.
My vision began to get sharper and more pronounced. Colours started to change and I watched the grass surrounding us take on a liquid ocean-like quality. Waves seemed to crash within the grassy expanses and I watched the edges of my peripheral vision cloud.
The elevator to the gallery was the funniest experience of the morning. We were squashed against several families as what can only be described as ‘elevator music’ piped through the invisible speakers. I pressed up against him and laughed into his chest as we rose. The glass and his t-shirt began to curl under my gaze.
We were walking again when we passed two tourists clearly confused by some signage. I tried my best to control my giggles and walked straight past. To my horror, he stopped and approached them asking what they were looking for. Thankfully they were after a building only a few metres away.
We checked our bag in and got out our iPods. I tried to search for matching albums so we could wonder in tune together. My fingers felt as tangled as the head phone cords as each artist that matched we seemed to have different albums! I finally reached C, and Coldplay - Viva la Vida matched! As the first burst of the violin introduction flowed into my ears, a calm wave spread over me. I searched for her hand and we floated through the gallery gasping as each new song or lyric seemed to explode with each new room we entered. It felt like we were sharing a waltz around the gallery looking into each others eyes and smiling, seeming to know what each was thinking.
As we started wandering through the gallery things began to catch my eye. I was transfixed by an Arthur Boyd landscape of all things – I’m usually never impressed with those – and conveyed my shock to the boy. It was a real effort to try to keep my urge to giggle in check. I paid close attention to the volume of my voice and laughter terribly conscious of the people surrounding us enjoying their normal un-acid-affected Sunday morning.
He pulled me aside to set up a simultaneous musical experience with the iPods we had bought along. They poured over our hands in a mass of wires and it was all too much for me to deal with. I dropped them in his lap and stared at the massive paintings of Chinese people surrounding us. Their expressions seemed to come alive and some of them were even winking at me. Soon enough he had somehow managed to separate the ear-buds. Now we had to find matching albums.
It took a good few minutes but finally we realised out of 8 gig of music each we had *one* of the same albums – Coldplay, Viva La Vida. I was quietly beaming as this one an album neither of us had really listened to with any great reverence and we were unlikely to have any associations with the music.
We plugged ourselves in and pressed both play buttons simultaneously. The music rose and filled the cavernous room we were standing in in an instant. We held each other’s hands and swam through the people, stopping only to stare at amazing pieces of art that seemed to leap out from their positions on the walls. I squeezed his hand every time I saw something that struck me. I could feel the waves begin to crash gently into me as the acid ramped up – everything was shimmering and my body felt tingly and often numb. I concentrated on my breathing and let the music take me away every time another wave hit - each time bigger than the last.
11.30am
The colours were becoming too much. Some rooms bathed us in a sea of pink or yellow adding to the confusion. We picked up our bag and headed down to the river front. I grabbed the watermelon lollies. The sudden burst of fluid and flavour surged through my mouth. We decided to head toward the man made lagoon as by now the sun was hot and we were both sweating.
The waves were now crashing with incredible speed and intensity. My body was almost all numb – my mouth, my jaw, my arms, my legs, my feet – I couldn’t feel anything except for a wonderful buzz that seemed to emanate from deep inside of me. I clutched his hand and motioned to the outdoors. I was having trouble standing and the colours were moving so fast I was beginning to get a real sense of sea-sickness. We travelled down the escalator with some difficulty and he collected the bags, me staring with amazement as he negotiated the crowd.
As we fought through the crowded markets I finally found the Fruit man. Four bananas with chocolate ribbons piped through them were some how exchanged for $10. We then found a cool grassy patch directly behind another busker who played a didge with a hippy backing track and drums. The sweet fruit again exploded in my mouth and I calmed as I watched the crowds pass us by.
We walked outside into the blinding sun, the heat hitting us both quickly. I wiped my brow and suggested we take a sit for a minute to compose ourselves. I looked down at the wooden slatted seat built into the walking track bridge and couldn’t believe how large it looked. I sat myself down not feeling my legs touch the wood at all, but knowing it felt good not to be fighting the sea-sickness that threatened to topple me over.
He reached into the backpack and pulled out a watermelon lolly which I quickly popped into my numb mouth. “Oh my GOODDDDD!” I exclaimed. “It’s like my tongue is a giant serpent!” I felt my tongue snake its way around my mouth and teeth and blinked in wonderment.
I suddenly remembered the sweat on my brow and pulled out my water bottle. I dribbled it over my arms and legs and took a deep swig before threatening to drench my singlet. We giggled and decided to head to the man-made beach lagoon for some splashing around.
He held my hand tightly as we navigated the growing number of people in the marketplace. I was busy concentrating on staying upright as he somehow bought us four chocolate bananas. I squeezed his hand and advised I was once again about to fall over.
We quickly found a grassy expanse to spread the blanket out and sit down.
He opened the banana for me and let me take a big bite – my eyes were wide and I laughed hysterically. It was the most amazing tasting thing I had ever had, except maybe for the watermelon lolly. The flavour seemed to explode in my mouth and the banana seemed to fill my entire consciousness. We sat listening to some amazing tribal didgeridoo music until my experience progressed again and I felt it was time to flee home to safety.
12.15pm
I gently squeezed her hand as we headed towards Grey Street in search of a cab. She was struggling to walk now and the added weight and concern made it difficult to navigate the streets. Crossing the road was an over cautious exercise until I tagged myself to a man and just followed his lead. I found a cab and some how managed to squeeze into the back seat and give the driver directions home. The giggles raised their head again and I tried to look out of the window but that made it worse. I closed my eyes only to be confronted by and explosion of colour. I looked across and saw she wasn’t wearing her seatbelt, but it was too much of a struggle to talk without bursting into fits of laughter. Instead I squeezed her hand and will the ride to end.
I held his hand with such strength that I thought it might be hurting him, but it was all I could do to stop myself falling over onto the road and sinking into the colours. Everything was shimmering and moving around me. The concrete, the people’s faces, the buildings, the trees – even the boy. I felt unsteady on my feet and still noticed that I didn’t have any feeling from my mouth down to my feet. I could hardly believe that I was capable of putting one foot in front of the other. My senses were in absolute overdrive.
We ran to take ownership of a cab that had just pulled over 20 metres ahead. I groaned as everything swum into a big mess before my eyes. He opened the car door and I fell inside, the contents of the cab spinning and lurching the same as the outside was.
I looked around as the stench assaulted my nose. It was a mixture of body odour, sweat, dust and cigarette smoke concentrated to such an extent that it made me gag. I lay back against the seat and clutched his hand as he sat adjacent. Every few minutes the waves subsided just enough for me to see the humour in the situation and giggle uncontrollably, but then as soon as clarity had come confusion took over and I was once again a boat bobbing on an fierce open sea of colour and sound.
12.30pm
As we rolled out of the car I threw $20 at the driver with a “Merry Easter” and tried to carry her through to the lounge. By now she could barely stand and drifted in and out of reality saying she was going to pass out. Part of me knew that she had no hope in hell. As soon as she closed her eyes, another world exploded, making sleep impossible.
I struggled to set the scene. Music, air conditioning, food. Nothing seems to make a difference. By now I was mentally strained. I went for a piss and was grateful we had cleaned the bathroom earlier. The bowl pulsed and melted to the ground. It was as if I was trying to piss into a Venus fly trap. The walls slid and pealed away. I would come back to the lounge and try to get her to sit up but her limbs were unresponsive. Every now and then she would clear her eyes enough to laugh and giggle before slipping back into her mind. I struggled to maintain control for 20 minutes before I realized I was doing myself more harm than good. I decided that as long as she was still breathing I will have to assume she was in a happy place and leave her to it.
I switched on Gardening Australian and marvelled at the joys of organic gardening. I suddenly became aware of a muffled bleeping noise outside. I stumble around for a few minutes before I realise it was the car alarm from her car. It seems I had left the boot open last night and drained the battery. I struggled to pop the hood as a swirl of engine leapt up at my face. I somehow managed to disconnect the battery (god knows how) and crawled back inside to grab a drink.
I barrel rolled out of the car and onto the grassy nature-strip out the front of our house. Everything was lurching and swimming harder and faster than ever. I swayed on the numb feet and legs and clutched for him as I keeled over. I repeated over and over that I was going to pass out. He seemed worried and led me into the lounge-room to lie on the couch.
At least it was cool in there. I lay on the leather couch, my body listless, a broken twig on a flowing river completely taken by the current. A world of colour and movement was constantly swimming all around me. I clutched my stomach as the motion jolted my vision around. I was silent when the waves were their most fierce, letting the force overtake me and fighting to keep up regular breathing. Then they would dissipate ever so slightly so I could once again appreciate the sheer insanity and sensory amazement this was bringing me. We giggled then I would slip back into a half consciousness, fighting for every breath.
1.30pm
By now I was worried for her mind. I sat her up and sternly demanded that she give me some sort of direction as to how I could help her because I was not enjoying how things have panned out. I suggested we retire to the bed room where I could switch the air conditioning on and lie next to her and hope that I could talk her into the land of the living. She slowly got to her feet and I half carried her through the house.
As I lay her down she began to remove her top and lay under the fan feeling the cool breeze against her nipples. I couldn’t help my self, and leaned over and gently kissed her breast. Her eyes shot open, as if given the antidote. I lean in and kissed her on the lips as she clawed at my pants. I slid down and swiftly pulled down her knickers and kissed my way up to her mouth. She was alive! As I slid inside her she cried out and inhaled my tongue. Every thrust was met with just as great thrust back. As if a demon had awoken she dug her nails into my flesh and her serpentine tongue search every opening of my body.
She came several times before I couldn’t contain myself and I exploded deep inside her with a groan. As I lay inside her it felt like two colours of moulded plastic had cooled into a single form. I felt her heart beat as if it was pumping my own blood and my sweat cooled under the swirling fan above.
As I rolled off, her eyes opened and I could see she was suddenly alive again and ready to play.
I was feeling extremely floaty and was coming in and out of severe sensory overload when he led me into the bedroom. Every few steps I could feel my legs giving way and my eyes rolling back into my head. I was ready to pass out then and there, but I knew I had to try to hold it all together.
I lay face down on the doona and took a big mouthful of material into my mouth. I spat it out and lay sprawled for a few moments before lurching myself upright and dragging my limp body so I was lying with my head on the pillow.
It was at this moment that I looked down over my body and felt my clothes against my skin. Things were melting around me at a rapid rate, but my skin was electric. I reached down and pulled my orange boob-tube down over my hips and let my unrestrained breasts fall against me. I glanced his way and he smiled and took my left nipple in his mouth. I cried out and almost fell back into the bedding as the sensation exploded within me.
“Oh.. this feels incredible..!” I moaned and managed to somehow unbutton my shorts and pull them over my legs and onto the floor. By this time he was reaching for my underpants but I removed them before he had the chance to even touch them. I pulled him over so he was crouching above me and kissed his lips hard with purpose.
My eyes closed in a moment of pure ecstasy. It felt as if I had developed highly sensitive fingertips on every part of my body and every time they came into contact with skin they would erupt in a molten wave of pleasure.
He was rubbing his hands over my body as I licked and kissed his shoulder and arms, moving up to his neck. The world was slipping away from me and it was only he and I rolling around in an acid playground of sex and sweat.
I pulled him closer toward me and reached for his hard cock guiding it to my wide open thighs. He pushed against me as I whimpered and felt another thousand explosions from within my crotch. I was wet with anticipation and the tension was palpable. I pulled him inside of me and immediately began to push hard against his strong hips. He answered with gusto and soon we were pumping in unison, sweat beading on our skin.
I opened my eyes every few minutes to see his half-open mouth uttering moans of intense pleasure. My breaths were heavy and fast and I could feel our skin touching in so many different locations, each spot erupting again and again with the same mind-blowing sensual fire.
2.15pm
I went down stairs and turned on the shower. As she washed I set up the sofa bed flat next to the computer and created a cocoon of pillows. By now she was laughing and singing in the shower as each droplet splashed against her body. I sat at the computer desk and marvelled as she rubbed soap over her tanned skin. “This is the best shower ever!!” she cried and I had to admit it looked inviting.
I tried focusing on the internet and check the latest football scores but the colours flowed down onto the desk making it illegible. I grabbed a towel for her and helped her out of the shower where she was trapped. I gently dried her and sat her down onto the pillowed throne where she could watch me from while I had a quick shower. As I dried myself I could sense she had that look in her eye again. I took her hand her we ran up to our bedroom.
I lay her down and slowly kissed my way across her stomach. The scent of her soap filled my face as I rolled my tongue into her vagina. As I searched for her clitoris she quickly began to heave and thrust her hips up into my face. The more I licked the stronger she thrust, until it almost felt that she would break my front teeth. Finally she clamped her thighs around my ears and shock for almost 30 seconds. I stuck my tongue out to find a poppy seed on the end. This resulted in fits of giggles.
I eventually extracted myself and lay next to her as she nibbled and kissed my neck and shoulders. As she dug her nails into my chest she ran her tongue over my cock, giggling as she attempted to suck me off. My erection would spring across her face, causing fits of laughter, which were cut short as her mind regained focus and she craved cock. I had a sudden fear that she would bend it too far back in her uncontrolled state so I guided her up onto my chest and entered her again. The rhythm increased until we both came simultaneously. I lay inside her again, with her heart beating strong against my chest.
I let him lead me downstairs to the bathroom where I deliberated for a few minutes. I was sweaty and I felt sticky so the decision to shower was made relatively quickly. I stood under the water in ecstasy. I could feel the water drops on my skin as if I were another person watching it all happen but was still feeling it. The water felt like it hit my skin metres above me – it was as if my body was somewhere else feeling this amazing sensation. I pushed the soap over my body and marvelled at the soft bubbly lather it created. It felt soft against my skin and soon I was entranced by the shower walls and door. My consciousness was clearer now and I could see snippets of reality through the peeling and dancing colours. I was laughing and smiling as I tried to navigate my way out of the small shower stall and find a towel to dry myself.
He helped me out and gently wiped the towel over my trembling body. It felt so cleansing and gentle. I lay down on the converted futon now fashioned into something of a day-bed with pillows and stretched myself out. The fan blew air gently over my skin and awakened the fiery sexual beast inside once again. I let my hands travel over my breasts to the points of my nipples and marvelled at the sensation of my fingers gently tracing their way between my legs. I looked over at him and smiled biting my bottom lip. He scooped me up and we ran into the bedroom.
3pm
The visuals were beginning to ease so I grabbed the bulberator and we each had a nitrous bulb (or two). I stumbled down to take a piss, again finding the bowl and floor tiles flowing around my feet. Over come by hunger I heated a bowl of left over lamb curry and let the different tastes of the prunes and pumpkin explode in my mouth. I settled in front of the television and turned on the match of the day. The interplay between the commentators had me yelling at the screen and then falling into small chuckles as I realised what I was saying. Each crunching tackle still had the effect of jumping out into the lounge room. The curry turned uneasily inside… I had buyers’ remorse.
I was lying next to him breathing heavily as a smile crept across my face. My body was buzzing with incredible energy, even though my eyes were aching and I was ready for sleep. The room around me looked as if it were made up of a series of graded paint chips. I looked at the door and cupboards and they looked similar.
He was now offering me a balloon filled with nitrous. I accepted with a giggle and proclaimed for the 10th time that day, “Those were the droids I was looking for!” We exploded in a fit of giggles and he made himself up a balloon.
We inhaled and I drifted off into a thick groggy world of disassociation. I began to come back slowly, laughing and smiling as he loaded another. “This is amazing”, I exclaimed.
I wandered out to sit on the cold black leather of the couch. I concentrated on each of my senses and realised that I could feel my skin resting atop my skeleton. I finally understood this strange sensation I had had for most of the day as my skin resting on my muscles resting on my bones. I could almost feel gravity itself holding everything together.
We laughed as I drifted in and out of waves of visual confusion. Things were starting to become more reasonable and I was able to talk and walk around when required.
4pm
We climbed into the hammock together then I had an urge to ride my bike. I donned my helmet and took off around the block. Cars seemed to come at me a little to fast so I stuck to the footpath. As I sped past a neighbour’s house, a large dog leapt up at me then proceeded to chase me along his fence line. I felt no fear, just excitement as I stared into the dogs eyes and taunted him by weaving closer to the fence. I arrived home a sweaty mess, had a shower and then finished the last of the nitrous in front of the television.
I wandered outside to sit on the hammock and enjoy the gentle rocking motion it would bring. I was amazed and delighted when he mentioned riding his bike around the block to burn off some ‘nervous energy’. He was intent on going in my dark grey boxer-like dressing gown until I advised against it. “What if it gets stuck in the spokes?” I laughed, “Then everyone would see your bare naked ass and you’d be raped!”
He finally dressed in some shorts and a t-shirt and put on his helmet. I watched him ride down the drive-way from my vantage point on the hammock and laughed as the bike wobbled. I lay blissfully content yet expectant. Looking forward to the tales he would bring home to regale me with.
7pm
Feeling as close to normal as I could, I had a valium washed down with an icy Gin and tonic. The subliminal advertising on the television had me craving a McDonald’s cheeseburger, but my smarter and much prettier conscience sitting next to me insisted I survive on biscuits and chocolate bananas instead.
Once he returned, we began to wind down for the night. I was still viewing everything from a large over-sized perspective and I was becoming tired of the constant movement from the corners of my eyes.
I asked the boy to please cut me up some pineapple in an effort to bring my body back to its normal functioning state, and it seemed to make all the difference in the world. We sat musing about McDonalds cheeseburgers before we both decided we were way too exhausted to move.
8.30pm
Took another valium and drifted off to sleep.
I took a valium and curled up underneath the whirring fan, secure in the knowledge that everything would look normal in the morning.
