Erm hi

[Nightmare:3enigma]

New here kinda, I've googled things to see what to expect many times over the years but never registered (I'm hella shy).
I legit was just reading a post and was like these people seem awesome soooooooo here I am, being all brave and making an effort to socialize (sorta).
Anyway this is enough to spark a panic attack soooooo if you have questions ask away! I'm open minded and an open book I just suck at actually starting convos or talking about me without a nudge *waving* byeee

 

[Jabberwocky]

Good day Nightmare:3enigma,

Being open minded is all that we ask for on Bluelight. Being shy is just part of your personality - I would hope it doesn't prevent you from asking questions or contributing in other ways on this site but if it does, that's OK.

So, on to the questions! :

What is your drug of choice?

Do you have any hobbies outside of drugs?

How did you come up with your username?

Welcome to Bluelight

 

[Nightmare:3enigma]

I wrote a response MY PHONE ATE IT ������ now I'm butthurt this will ramble sorry
Ok so fine trollingtons McGee (actual name I gave it)
DOCs methamphetamine addys opioids (except percocet higher than 7.5s) I guess benzos (I actually need them extremely often so it looks like overuse thanks to some mutant gene and 7,000 forms of constant anxiety and/or rage) and my migraine meds fioricet (APAP/butalbatal/caffeine) and soma yes I legit need them but they're kinda bomb AF as a bonus
Hobbies I had stripped away for 16 years so I'm working on em they were reading gaming (console board and card) so far I can swing pokemon go lol and what ever article I happen to find mildly interesting on my phone I was a HUUUUUUGE raver buuuuut being above 30 and single mommin' 2 minis plus living in bumfuck that's a nahh now MUSIC MUSIC MUSIC in so many ways
My username is what if I ever get going with this pipedream my stage name would be it came from a dark week of crying and self loathing I ended up on the text version of suicide hotline...
Me: my fraking life is a shitstorm nightmare
SH: *generic validation with passive it cant be that bad line*I then proceed with a tangent that threw us both
SH: i can't dx but multiple personality issues seem possible
ME: bruh...naaaaaafekinuhhhh *passivagresive reaming* followed by me saying I'm up & down I'm my own =&OP reaction I study psychology for fun I know what is disorder and illness in my head but because I'm as I call bihypocritacic yin+yang lost upside down in the woods personality type just cause I'm happy and sad or pissed and sad and laughing no reason to call me sybil mmmmmkay?
I got a restricted call right then (its 2am Its 1 of 2 things) me: kiki's road kill cafe you kill em we grill em chef Jeff has a half off leg of guy tonight
Them: *stifling tears* you miss are an enigma
Me hold up who TF is you????
Them we just spoke for 3 hours and I'm breaking so many rules
Me that blocked # yours??? Cause is isssssh not blocked well 574 68* ****
Them proof of what I said and you're right no you shouldn't die but yes enigma your world is a nightmare and you own it
Me dafuq??? U high?
Hours of reflection and visions (not drug induced) I has new handle
Ok your turn��

 

[Jabberwocky]

thank you, I love your introduction!

My DOC was meth and weed, I've since been sober.

My hobbies include video games (also card games), long walks in the city, trollololing, snow boarding, snowmobiling, hunting and hiking.

My username is the best description of myself I could think of. And since you study psych, i'll give you a more specific label - Bipolar and antisocial.

I love the passion in which you write. Don't change that!

Hope to hear more from you,
madness00