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Enough is enough (heroin)

daytryptr

daytryptr

Bluelighter
Joined
Aug 5, 2012
Messages
915
Location
terra
I'm deleting this post, at my roommate's request. He calls me paranoid, then the next day accuses me of stealing money i lent to him. Accuses me of incriminating him in MY mess. Tells me he trusts me, but wants to put a lock on his door, says i fucked with his phone, computer, after i make one phone call to our ISP asking about an outage since my cell was having issues.

I'm still trying to end this addiction, but i need to start over here, and deal with this issue with him first.

I'm on 10mg of methadone, 5mg 6 hours ago, and 5mg 30m ago. Cut my Herion usage daily in half, and am considering taking your advice and just getting rid of it. I'll taper with clonidine and methadone, and deal with it.

I'm just in a really rough emotional place right now, trying to get clean, and out of the blue having someone i trust the most act like this to me, and treat me like this.

He doesn't understand all the illegal things i've done, are on me. He's paranoid about legal ramifications against him, when everything legal except the lease on the house is in my name.

I'll try and update as soon as possible, but i need to deal with this issue with him first. I think he's assuming my addiction is a justification for him to asssume im an asshole, thief, liar, untrustworthy person, when i've helped him out so much, trusted him so much, its just really tearing me up emotionally. Especially when i've been so honest to him in the last few days.

Don't worry about me turning to drugs to numb these issues, i'm going to sit down and talk to him, and if he doesn't realize my addiction has nothing to do with my charachter or respect for him and his posessions, responsibilities, i can't live with him anymore.

I help him out so much financially, and he has the nerve to accuse me of all these things, simply because i open up to him and am honest about my problems. I'm not going to take that. My charachter is what it is, and if he's going to call it into question simply because i am honest with him, then fuck him. He can find another place to live, and somebody else to pick up the slack at the end of the month when rent and bills are due.

Sorry about the venting, i'm going to end my post here. I need some time to think and compose myself before he comes home from work tonight.

I'm still comitted to being sober, but all this bullshit he's bringing into my life right now is very counterproductive. And i won't be the nice guy and help him if thats the attitude hes going to take towards me.

Thanks for the love and understanding, i only wish there was more of it irl right now, especially from someone i trust as much as i do him.

I have a vacation from work at the start of october, i think i'll go a bit south for a while and stay with family if this is the attitude hes going to take. Its counterproductive to my soberity, insulting to my charachter, and uncalled for. I won't live with someone who says they trust me, but accuse me of all those things, and say he wants a lock on his door.
 
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Yeah taper or not is kind of beside the point. I've never heard of a taper involving H going successfully....then again I'm in no mood to say anything to anyone about anything.
 
Hey Day=D.. good to see you.. sorry that you are in this spot. An addiction like this is a great time to make much need changes in your life and thinking. Given the posts I have seen from you and really enjoyed I dont think than changing your thinking will be that hard for you.. I have always seen a special brightness to you.

I would not think of going back on the herion for any reason.. as others have stated you are pretty much through the acute withdrawal.. If i were you I would loose the kratom. I am not a big fan of tappers unless the person has a huge habit... even though they MAY lessen the withdraws somewhat I think the keep you in them for way longer.


Here is the best detox plan in my opinion. first dont even think about the methadone unless you are unable to stay clean.. methadone has a very long half life for most people and will not aid you in your withdrawals.. I am actually against suboxone or methadone used to withdraw people from opiates that have a shorter half life. and frequently I put out the option of a person switching to morphine from suboxone or methadone to facilitate a quicker withdrawal.. the half life of morphine is around four hours... the half life of methadone is at average is 37 hours but as i varies wildly from patient to patient it can be as low as four hours and as high as 140 hours. When we go through acute withdrawal we need to get all the drug out of the system and all drugs that work at the opiat receptors and then wait about three three and a half days for the initial miracle to happen. If the opiat receptors are stimulated at all they will relain active and the process starts over..

This is why I almost always recommend staying of the kratom, lope, etc etc.. as well as why I have no damn idea why they use opiates with long half lifes to try and detox people..


The medications I would explore the use of fror detox would be:

>Clonidine< DOSED EVER FOUR HOURS..

one of either
>NEURONTIN< >HERE< >HERE<
OR >Lyrica<

>A BENZO BUT JUST AT NIGHT<
>a nsaid<
>melatonin<
tylenol

Addiction Guide


How long have you been using the H and what else you been using.. if you want to share.. the reason I ask is that the acutes are what everyone always focusses on but the real battle is the addiction not the physical dependence and the PAWS.. so I can help you out better for the real battle i just asked.

YOu really are an amazing person.. but remember intelligence is not usually your friend in this and your addiction lives in your own mind.. and is more powerful than your conscious mind..

You can do this and we can give you allot of advise on how to to this in the most peaceful and successful way possible.

Nice work on coming to this decision day. Ist hard but you can do this<3
 
This is why I almost always recommend staying of the kratom, lope, etc etc.. as well as why I have no damn idea why they use opiates with long half lifes to try and detox people..
Click to expand...

Yes, the answer is because they do not give a flying fuck.....people who are on subs or methadone and honestly believe they are "clean"........its just a lie. And a lot of them I am sure are tricked into thinking this way because of the system in place.

Methadone is a hard drug. Suboxone is a hard drug. And I'm glad I've never gotten addicted to these (call it a taper plan, maintenence drug, whatever its all a bunch of BS imo). Now, I'm sure some will disagree with me so just be warned this is my opinion and I am in a shitty mood anyway, I'm sure I could say this all with a little more tact if I wasn't. So don't take my opinions personal anyone.

It just blows my mind, driving home the point that this world really does run on bullshit about 95% of the time. lol I should probably not even be posting right now, we need a "Ozekat's bitching and ranting thread 101" somewhere lol.......

Oh and another reason for this.....you can't rule out the money !!! If they can make money off some synthetic opioids they call maintenence drugs or whatever you bet your ass they will!
 
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i can understand doing a methadone taper, but you can't do a heroin taper really, you will just wake up the "memory cells" in your brain and it ill remind you how good heroin can make you feel. I would sell the H and keep the methadone to taper.

However if you've cold turkeyed 2 days, you only have one or two more days until the withdrawls get significantly easier, i would still advise a low dose of methadone to help you kick, depending on the size of your habit 5-20 mg methadone every couple of days diminishing the dose every couple of days would be better than a mix of valium, etizolam, mxe and kratom (which has a far shorter half life than methadone).

Are you addicted to the benzos, or is this sporadic use? You do not want a benzo addiction replacing your current one...

" Bon courage l'ami" !
 
Edited my first post to reflect some current changes in my situation. This is rough, and i don't know what to do at this point with my roommate.
 
I'd personally try to just "jump off" from your current dose, use clonidine for twitching and restless legs, use a benzo for anxiety and sleep (not too much though!), tylenol/advil for aches, imodium (for the diarrhea), drink lots of water and gatorade, flush your system, try to eat (I know it can be hard when detoxing), and just bang it out it's a bitch but, it's going to suck no matter when you do it and your dose is so low might as well deal with it now!! I did a "medical detox" at a treatment centre and they did a sub taper with me and I wish I never did it, just made me feel shitty in detox, then they took me off it and sent me to treatment and I was detoxing from the subs in treatment which took another 7-14 days if I could do it again I would refuse the subs they just prolong the detox
 
lman_15 said:
and just bang it out it's a bitch but, it's going to suck no matter when you do it and your dose is so low might as well deal with it now!! I did a "medical detox" at a treatment centre and they did a sub taper with me and I wish I never did it, just made me feel shitty in detox, then they took me off it and sent me to treatment and I was detoxing from the subs in treatment which took another 7-14 days if I could do it again I would refuse the subs they just prolong the detox
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+1 couldn't agree more.. also neurontin and lyrica often work miracles with the RLS and aches and pains.
 
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