Endless Benzo/z-drug PAWS

[PainGodTodd]

I used prescribed z-drugs (ambien, lunesta) and benzos (temazepam) for insomnia for 16 years. My doc never told me that these drugs were problems and I was so naive.

I stopped using them 6 years ago.

Been in hell ever since. Burning skin. Tight painful muscles. Out of control anxiety.

Can't take this any more. Been everywhere looking for a solution and tried everything I can find. I think I'm fucked for life at this point. Anyone got any out of the box ideas? It's starting to dawn on me that I probably ain't coming back from this one.

 

[MikeSS]

what are the negatives associated with taking benzos or their close relatives (etizolam) for extended periods, even for a lifetime? I've noticed in my own life a mild tolerance developing which reaches a mild level and stabilizes (once a night before going to sleep and very occasional daytime stress reduction when encountering a stressful day for some reason).

Other than the hassles of getting them, especially since Customs has cracked down on packages from India - a clear and obvious collusion between U.S. pharma companies and U.S. enforcement minions - I have never experienced any negatives from my use of these anioxlytics - over 40 years. My blood/kidney/liver/etc. tests always come back fine. This campaign against the druggies who overdo whatever they get their hands on is not my responsabilities nor yours, yet we are asked to pay the price and are treated like criminals. Doctor's appointments with attendent fees, cost of the medication itself - a magnitude higher than what they cost in India. The paranoia of wondering if Customs is going to "do" something, thus putting us in a state of infantile defensiveness and wariness.

So . . . why are you concerned about this?

Oh . . . I just noticed you said Ambien and Lunesta. I've got no experience with them but really, the same logic applies. It's your body, your consciousness . . . not anyone elses'

 

[burn out]

I'm in the same boat, been off benzos since 2009. Never fully recovered, life has been hell ever since. I tried all sorts of things to help but even the most help-full thinggs only brought a small amount of relief. A while back I realized my only options were suicide or try to live like this until I die a natural death. I'm working on the second option, every week I try to somehow find it in me to live another week.

 

[SpiralusSancti]

What about simply therapeutic doses of benzos for a lifetime? Plenty of people with decades of use with relatively good life no matter how shitty benzos are they are still way better for most people than decades of getting drunk daily.

 

[PainGodTodd]

Unfortunately regular benzo use is associated with developing cognitive deficits and dementia.

But, since my quality of life is nil, that's on the table as well. I was just hoping to find another solution. I've watched a several people go through dementia and I have no desire to end up on that path.

 

[SpiralusSancti]

True that but it’s all gamble as so is living with stress/anxiety/depression also known to fuck up brain and don’t even feel good so..

Life of hell vs. dementia in old age seems pretty easy decision.

I was addicted to big amounts of benzo for years and no matter how hard it was in the beginning nowadays I do only minuscule amounts and when I do other stuff usually not at all.

Trick is to work on repairing brain & body and it takes years after initial hell lasting months.

When I get back into weed & psychedelics & dissos & sex & so on I’ll fuck them off totally for good.

I could easy be without benzos and switch to pregabalin if I wanted in a matter of days but that’s rather recreational gabanareic and sooner or latter it would be as bad as with benzos.

One of worst mistakes of my lifetime is taking benzos/gabanerics in general, and trust me, I’m an mistake expert †!

 

[PainGodTodd]

Well, was just hoping there is a third option.

These fucking pills ruined my life.

 

[PainGodTodd]

I'm in the same boat, been off benzos since 2009. Never fully recovered, life has been hell ever since. I tried all sorts of things to help but even the most help-full thinggs only brought a small amount of relief. A while back I realized my only options were suicide or try to live like this until I die a natural death. I'm working on the second option, every week I try to somehow find it in me to live another week.

What issues are you left with?

 

[SpiralusSancti]

Well, was just hoping there is a third option.

These fucking pills ruined my life.

There are millions of other options.

Some good for me, some good for you.
But I think getting brain chemistry to normal as much possible is good idea for everyone, no?

Even “brain chemistry imbalance is cause of <something>” is more of a concept than acknowledged fact you sure do feel when you fuck it up and when you repair it; how much of it is mind (whatever that is?) and how much of it is excitatory and calming and all kinds of magic chemicals bumping around brain is still water unknown. But if you can function just fine without surprisingly big chunks of brain taken out be it because of cancer or whatever, you can also function just fine with a bit fucked up GABA system for sure. I’ll that far and say that you CAN unfuck up your brain from most of stuff if you stear away from bad synths of mCPP, cloro-amphs, fat lines of drugs active in mg range etc..

 

[PainGodTodd]

I don’t take any drugs besides lamictal. No fat lines of anything. I’m still so fucked that there’s not many day I don’t feel ending the whole thing.

If someone knows the secret of even halfway fixing what these pills did to me I’d love to hear it. Been trying to fix this for years.

 

[SpiralusSancti]

There’s no secret. You used drugs that were involved in one of basic functions of body for too long. You chemically induced sleep for years and were probably treating underlying anxiety/depression and when you stopped it caused rebound issues in various ways.

What exactly you tried to repair yourself? What exactly caused you to even stop benzos and z-drugs? Did they still worked for insomnia when you stopped them? How old you were when you started?

 

[nznity]

This is the reason why I'm never gonna quit clonazepam till I die, I don't ever wanna experience benzo wds.

 

[Juniper Bruhmomentius]

This is the reason why I'm never gonna quit clonazepam till I die, I don't ever wanna experience benzo wds.

I already did, and as Im back To them... Never again. Even the low potency benzos help me a load so I see only positives To using them.

 

[psychnauticmage]

True that but it’s all gamble as so is living with stress/anxiety/depression also known to fuck up brain and don’t even feel good so..

Life of hell vs. dementia in old age seems pretty easy decision.

I was addicted to big amounts of benzo for years and no matter how hard it was in the beginning nowadays I do only minuscule amounts and when I do other stuff usually not at all.

Trick is to work on repairing brain & body and it takes years after initial hell lasting months.

When I get back into weed & psychedelics & dissos & sex & so on I’ll fuck them off totally for good.

I could easy be without benzos and switch to pregabalin if I wanted in a matter of days but that’s rather recreational gabanareic and sooner or latter it would be as bad as with benzos.

One of worst mistakes of my lifetime is taking benzos/gabanerics in general, and trust me, I’m an mistake expert †!

Pregabalin works by blocking VDCC receptors (voltage dependent calcium channels), It is not gabaergic. Also very different withdrawal to benzos, I'd consider the pregabalin a safer option honestly

 

[SpiralusSancti]

Well that might explain a lot. I must admit I’m both very ashamed for myself not knowing that and pissed I wasn’t informed by medical specialists. I literately asked for it cuz I wanted more uplifting GABANERIC to replace my benzo habit. I just tried it a few times relationally before that and stupidly concluded by it’s effects that it gota bit gabaneric.

This also explains why I have seizure on it? First and only time in my life I had seizure from something and I guess thing is I might have seizure from lack of benzos and not too much of pregabaline, what’s the likelihood for that?

LESSON LEARNED: I’ll behave with doctors like ignorant pushers from now on!!!

Now I’m seriously considering giving pregabaline another chance.

 

[psychnauticmage]

Well that might explain a lot. I must admit I’m both very ashamed for myself not knowing that and pissed I wasn’t informed by medical specialists. I literately asked for it cuz I wanted more uplifting GABANERIC to replace my benzo habit. I just tried it a few times relationally before that and stupidly concluded by it’s effects that it gota bit gabaneric.

This also explains why I have seizure on it? First and only time in my life I had seizure from something and I guess thing is I might have seizure from lack of benzos and not too much of pregabaline, what’s the likelihood for that?

LESSON LEARNED: I’ll behave with doctors like ignorant pushers from now on!!!

Now I’m seriously considering giving pregabaline another chance.

Pregabalin won't give you seizures, but withdrawal from benzos will.

I'd be careful about tapering off them. Do it slowly and take your time.

Some doctors are incompetent but not all of them. This is true with any profession. You just have to look around for the good ones. It can take a while sometimes.

Also, it's not gabanergic it's GABA-ergic. There's no N.

 

[SpiralusSancti]

Well, it is in my country so I thought it’s GABA-neric on English but thanks for correcting me.

I’m done with tapering benzos a long, long time ago. It’s been years since I stopped abusing them and started sorting out my life and getting back into things I love.

I thought I read somewhere on BL it does lower seizure threshold. Time I got seizure it was if memory serves me well at least 15 – 20 days after my last dose of benzo but I took a lot of pregabalin. I don’t remember how much exactly, I might have died from suffixation (not right word?) if I was alone. Seizure started moment after I took a hit of weed, is that pure coincidence or might be connected somehow?

 

[psychnauticmage]

Well, it’s GABA-nerik in my country so I thought it’s GABA-neric on English but thanks for correcting me.

I’m done with tapering benzos a long, long time ago. It’s been years since I stopped abusing them and started sorting out my life and getting back into things I love.

I thought I read somewhere on BL it does lower seizure threshold. Time I got seizure it was if memory serves me well at least 15 – 20 days after my last dose of benzo but I took a lot of pregabalin. I don’t remember how much exactly, I might have died from suffixation (not right word?) if I was alone. Seizure started moment after I took a hit of weed, is that pure coincidence or might be connected somehow?

Ah interesting. What country are you from?

I'm glad to hear you were able to get off the benzos and get back to doing things you love.

Well, pregabalin is actually given to epileptic patients in order to stop seizures so I don't think it caused your seizure.

I'm not sure about the marijuana, I suppose it's possible that it could have caused a seizure if you took enough of it but I think that's a rare side effect

 

[SpiralusSancti]

Yes I know that. In fact up until lately it was only way to get it prescribed here but I think it was about lowering threshold seizure during alcohol WD’s or when taken in big enough dose or in some combo or something..paradoxical effects like it happens with some chems..

I know one doctor almost lost job cuz prescribing 1600mg/daily (400mg more than normaly allowed) to SO who got seizure and almost died (that’s what I’m told but he was hospitalised 100%). I’m not aware of other drugs were involved but can conclude he was on some opiod and that it’s unlikely he experimented with something wild because I know his friend (when I see him I’ll try to find out more details as when he told me that I wasn’t surprised as it happened to me too and just concluded it’s from too much pregab). And I know one more example of seizure from pregab at in that case it's someone who I know personally, only other drug involved was weed and it happened to person who was never benzo addict, he was addicted to heroin and coke but that was many years before he was prescribed pregabalin If it ain’t for things like that I wouldn’t think twice before getting pregab at least for occasional “free fun”. 3 cases of pregab seizure, 2 of which required hospitalization from relatively new drug makes me wonder if it’s really safer than benzos...hm… I also had that feeling when I first started using it but after seizure more or less discarded that idea as my wishful thinking as it’s much more recreational than benzos.

Well, had to give it a bit thought how precisely I’m ready to pinpoint my location publicly.
I’m from one of most beautiful EU countries

 

[psychnauticmage]

Yes I know that. In fact up until lately it was only way to get it prescribed here but I think it was about lowering threshold seizure during alcohol WD’s or when taken in big enough dose or in some combo or something..paradoxical effects like it happens with some chems..

I know one doctor almost lost job cuz prescribing 1600mg/daily (400mg more than normaly allowed) to SO who got seizure and almost died (that’s what I’m told but he was hospitalised 100%). I’m not aware of other drugs were involved but can conclude he was on some opiod and that it’s unlikely he experimented with something wild because I know his friend (when I see him I’ll try to find out more details as when he told me that I wasn’t surprised as it happened to me too and just concluded it’s from too much pregab). And I know one more example of seizure from pregab at in that case it's someone who I know personally, only other drug involved was weed and it happened to person who was never benzo addict, he was addicted to heroin and coke but that was many years before he was prescribed pregabalin If it ain’t for things like that I wouldn’t think twice before getting pregab at least for occasional “free fun”. 3 cases of pregab seizure, 2 of which required hospitalization from relatively new drug makes me wonder if it’s really safer than benzos...hm… I also had that feeling when I first started using it but after seizure more or less discarded that idea as my wishful thinking as it’s much more recreational than benzos.

Well, had to give it a bit thought how precisely I’m ready to pinpoint my location publicly.
I’m from one of most beautiful EU countries

I suppose it's possible. I'm not a medical doctor so I can't say for sure. It just seems like a rather unlikely outcome.

I personally have experience with gabapentin and pregabalin (they both work on VDCCs) and have never experienced anything like that. And I've taken quite a lot of pregabalin plus weed plus a bunch of other stuff all at once without issue. I've had some friends join me and they all enjoyed the experience. Everyone's brain chemistry is different though and you cannot predict with absolute certainty how someone will react to a drug, hence the situation with your doctor losing his license.

Gabapentinoids like pregabalin are only mildly recreational anyhow (at least in my experience) so I don't see too much value in them except for their therapeutic potential in treating certain conditions.

Hmm, I wonder what the best country in the EU is.

Take care of yourself spiralus.

I'm out~