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EADD Heroin thread v.XXV -- a quarter centuary of threads if not yet a full decade since the 'drought'...

dsd said:
Am I right in thinking that you live in Ulster?
I always thought heroin or crack dealers get battered or occasionally killed there? Remember DAAD.
Although I find it hard to believe it ain't being sold there.
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you might mean RAAD? republican action against drugs? gives people drugs with one hand to deal and knee cap them with the other hand after they have made them a few quid, same with the other side with the likes of UVF or UDA drug gangs but they stuck to coke, e's, weed, steroids and benzos and zops n pregablin/lyrica whilst the republican gangs mainly done brown, spice and coke but mainly stuck to the londonderry/derry and ballymena areas so brown rarely made it to belfast but when the russians arrived they flipped it all up in the air and flooded belfast with high purity brown and (at the start atleast) very quick, 10am shop open and 10pm closed but you could fone them and wait from anywhere from 5 mins to 2 hours in the rain on a street corner with 5 other customers. thank fuck thats long gone from my life
we didnt have crack dealers really when i was using as the russians only did brown, if you wanted crack, you bought a gram of coke and made it yourself and i heard after i quit they started doing 'white' which was apparently just meth/cathinone a-like and 'spice' too, nearly every dealer i used to go to moved onto selling spice alongside instead of crack
 
matt<3ketamine said:
10am shop open and 10pm closed but you could fone them and wait from anywhere from 5 mins to 2 hours in the rain on a street corner with 5 other customers. thank fuck thats long gone from my life
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even though its been close to 3 years since it was a regular fixture in my life, every time the weather is bad i'm relieved i'm not scoring '10 minutes mate, 10 minutes.... he's just left now....' at least we mostly had 24 hours a day except sunday morning cos apparently dealers are all religious or something.
 
Urgh nothing worse than when the guy with the best stuff gets "powder power" and goes on like they're doing you a favour by selling you hard, addictive drugs...
 
Never understood that mentality. They’re bringing the money to you, if they were even five minutes late, my money walks.

If everyone else had the same approach, the dealers would be Johnny on the spot.
 
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LoginNotSecure said:
Never understood that mentality. They’re bringing the money to you, and they were even five minutes late, my money walks.

If everyone else had the same approach, the dealers would be Johnny on the spot.
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aye but when they are your last resort, you pretty much gotta wait if you dont want withdrawals
 
chinup said:
even though its been close to 3 years since it was a regular fixture in my life, every time the weather is bad i'm relieved i'm not scoring '10 minutes mate, 10 minutes.... he's just left now....' at least we mostly had 24 hours a day except sunday morning cos apparently dealers are all religious or something.
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haha they stopped on sundays, that is both weird as fuck and hilarious at the same time
 
That light brown babania that you get in the darknet that says its "straight off the brick" (housebrick more like) - what kind of purity are we talking? I just snort it - what kind of cut do they put in it?
 
Most likely caffeine, cause you can't smoke it straight off the brick
 
Ismene2 said:
That light brown babania that you get in the darknet that says its "straight off the brick" (housebrick more like) - what kind of purity are we talking? I just snort it - what kind of cut do they put in it?
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Someone was telling me just the other day about someone sniffing the H.
I thought you can't sniff the H #3 we get here in the UK?
 
@steewith2ees @F.U.B.A.R. @chinup

I've been totally clean for nearly a week & a half now & ended up with some random "street guy" I kinda know by face yesterday (you know all too well what the street heroin life is like) anyway his homeless & had been robbed a few days ago so had no phone & hence no numbers. He asked me to go score for him & he would sort me, at the time I truly was 50/50 on it & usually I'd be getting that butterfly feeling in my gut knowing some tasty b & maybe some white was coming my way but I felt flat tbh, it simply didn't give me that spark anymore.

All the times before I've not had something & the first chance I get to score I'm all over it, I'd been folling myself thinking I had finally turned my back on the fucking gear but I hadn't if you know what I mean here?

Anyway he ended up scoring 3 times (6 bags & 3 white, the usual 3 for 20 score) & though I had both for sorting it out I really didn't get that true opiate joy from it, I honestly think next time I am paid I'm NOT gonna score & it honestly felt to me like something had changed this time around in my MENTAL STATE which IMHO is over half the battle with gear, I have a theory which I won't go into but it's along the basis of a addict can actually THINK theirself into a rattle, I'm NOT saying folks don't get sick as the bad stomach, cramp, not sleeping, twitchy legs & diarrhea PROVE THAT plus I ALWAYS start to rattle by sneezing & yawning for hours then comes the shitting.

How did you lot cope after getting clean? How you fill up your time?
 
Zopiclone bandit said:
@steewith2ees @F.U.B.A.R. @chinup

I've been totally clean for nearly a week & a half now & ended up with some random "street guy" I kinda know by face yesterday (you know all too well what the street heroin life is like) anyway his homeless & had been robbed a few days ago so had no phone & hence no numbers. He asked me to go score for him & he would sort me, at the time I truly was 50/50 on it & usually I'd be getting that butterfly feeling in my gut knowing some tasty b & maybe some white was coming my way but I felt flat tbh, it simply didn't give me that spark anymore.

All the times before I've not had something & the first chance I get to score I'm all over it, I'd been folling myself thinking I had finally turned my back on the fucking gear but I hadn't if you know what I mean here?

Anyway he ended up scoring 3 times (6 bags & 3 white, the usual 3 for 20 score) & though I had both for sorting it out I really didn't get that true opiate joy from it, I honestly think next time I am paid I'm NOT gonna score & it honestly felt to me like something had changed this time around in my MENTAL STATE which IMHO is over half the battle with gear, I have a theory which I won't go into but it's along the basis of a addict can actually THINK theirself into a rattle, I'm NOT sayin g folks don't get sick as the bad stomach, cramp, not sleeping, twitchy legs & diarrhea PROVE THAT plus I ALWAYS start to rattle by sneezing & yawning for hours then comes the shitting.

How did you lot cope after getting clean? How you fill up your time?
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That's amazing mate, sounds like you've passed a milestone there (metaphorically speaking). Are you maintaining on methadone or have you literally had nothing until now? Either way, you've done brilliantly. I agree with everything you've said about that change in mental state. It's hard to put your finger on, but some switch eventually trips inside your head and the 'magic' is lost. Relapses are normal, but use them wisely and they can reinforce your new found dislike of that state of consciousness.

As for how to cope after getting clean?

It's circumstances mate. For me, it was finally finding a job I wasn't prepared to fuck up (again). But at the end of the day, it all boils down to resolve and determination....
 
Coping with life is the hard part. On my phone with almost no Internet reception so rather than write a long post that might get lost in the ether I'll just say we'll fucking done man and I'll write more later.
 
Zopiclone bandit said:
How did you lot cope after getting clean? How you fill up your time?
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When I first cleaned up properly with it holding, it took the help of a complete but slow re - invention, with my fun time still accessible through using normal drugs and getting back into going out and getting fucked, but with more moderation. It took a girlfriend who, being someone I had been friends and partying with (and prior to my getting addicted to heroin, chasing) who approved of this, being a caner herself, notwithstanding heroin which she developed a particular hatred after seeing what just 2 years of full on addiction had done to me. It took getting back into work, making do with a couple of shitty jobs before I landed my first real one since I stopped nursing for everything to fall into place but it finally came unstuck 6 1/2 years later as soon as I started losing alot of these things I have gained back, having only quit in the first place through necessity rather than choice, the anchors described above thankfully coming into place after spending 6 months clean.

This was after 2 years and at this stage it will take not just a detox but a total rehabilitation period followed by the real motivation to get back into the rat race. I don't know where that will come from but don't let my failures be any indication of your chances of success.
 
If you ever get bored or tempted Stee, and want something to do, drop me a line if you wanna fanny about with some wood and tools and make something. You can do two things, lose a finger or arm, or make something beautiful. You ran the same risk before mind.
 
LoginNotSecure said:
If you ever get bored or tempted Stee, and want something to do, drop me a line if you wanna fanny about with some wood and tools and make something. You can do two things, lose a finger or arm, or make something beautiful. You ran the same risk before mind.
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or, you could injure yourself and also make something completely shit too (which would almost certainly be the scenario if it were me)
 
ageingpartyfiend said:
or, you could injure yourself and also make something completely shit too (which would almost certainly be the scenario if it were me)
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this was my problem with art therapy. like how is it supposed to help you in any way if you just make something shit?

@Zopiclone bandit how you doing man? when are you getting paid? have you got any plans for how you're gonna deal with the temptation that may arise?

when i got out of rehab i filled up my time with literally every option going. i was doing meetings daily, sometimes 2. gym, going to the buddhist centre for meditation weekly, seemed to spend my entire life on a bus tbh, but i jut did not give myself time to score. i had very little time at home and the time i did have at home i spent practisiing my bass, drawing, or reading mostly.

finding out who i actually was was a bit difficult. like most adults have been an adult for a while and know what they like etc. i'd been on something or other every day from the age of 16 so genuinely didn't know what i like doing or how i feel about things, all i'd cared about was getting fucked up. i mostly reverted to the interests i had as a teenager- i.e. punk rock, cats, and being a nerd. luckily for me those are pretty cool interests even as an adult.

in my first ever NA meeting i said 'i just want to be able to have interests again' cos the drugs had made me completely one dimensional, as they do everyone who takes it far enough. somehow in my crack addled brain i'd hit on some wisdom, turned out it was a pretty important for me.
 
After 40 years of hard drug abuse I finally went into detox and rehab 3m ago and am loving being clean. Detoxed using subs fu$kin amazing stuff tapered over a month a d though a little weary and sleepless so much better than mdone. Thought I'd check In just in case there are those that still remember me...hope yaarl doing well. See you in another year
 
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