I get seen by a Phych in a drug clinic for that sort of thing so I wouldn't need to self medicate my own taper, but I should not be in that centre I should be in another centre near by for people who have genuine mental health issues, I'm only there because following a W/D seizure that hospitalised me I told a bunch of lies in hospital in a desperate attempt to get help because where I live unless you're a junkie nobody listens to you,
So in hospital I told them I had been taking 50 street blues a day and stuff and so they released me after a week under the supervision on a drug centre and on a Valium script,
When in actual fact I was only ever taking 5 (max 10) blues a day, and the reason for the heavy seizure was because they had 10mg+ Diaz in them and fucknows how many mgs of Phenazepam it was a dodgy batch,
The 1st Diazepam tablet I ever took was prescribed from a GP at about 17-18 yrs old who told me I had severe anxiety, I have been suffering from this as well as symptoms of paranoid psychosis from a very young age, tried anti-depressants and anti-psychotics and all that shit, and the only thing that relieves me is benzos,
Cut a long story short I have admitted to the drug clinic that I told them a bunch of lies to get help and told them about my childhood, when I begged everyone for help telling the truth I got nowhere so now they are thinking about transferring me into the centre I should be in who deals with people who are NOT addicts but just have issues,
So I don't plan on any sort of taper at all, just sensible use, I know my mgs and limitations, but if the day comes that I DO need to start tapering them I told the Psychiatrist that it should be done using 2mg tablets cutting me down by 1mg per month,
Problem is the script I'm on (25mgs Valium P/D) isn't even enough as it is, so the day the doses start going down I don't even want to imagine what my life will be like, I'll probably end up not leaving the house at all, it's anxiety inducing for me just to leave the house now never mind benzo free, don't get me wrong it would be great not to be tied to a chemist but that's the hand I was delt...
And as far as Etizolam is concerned, that is something I would only ever take at night time once in a blue moon, it's a thieno, and thienos are not day time drugs as far as I'm concerned, not for my body anyway, plus I get that eye twitching shit from it, my ideal script would be 6mg Clonaz per day with 2mg Xanax as and when required
